ADVICE NEEDED MATES



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 Post subject: ADVICE NEEDED MATES
PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2011 9:32 am 
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MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:04 pm
Posts: 53
Before 2-3 days my gf text me : i wanna tell u something there is no future between us please dont ask me questions and dont call me to date.i will be happy to be friends.
And i agreed her decision and didnt text her or contact and s.o.
BUt yesterday she started texting me calling me but i did not respond and in the end she sms that she realised she loved me and she hopes i love her too.I love her but she did wrong breaking me.I told her i love her too but i dont believe her and she did not respond.What u think about that.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2011 11:56 am 
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MPUA Forum Zealot

Joined: Fri Oct 15, 2010 5:59 pm
Posts: 308
Location: Texas
Pragmatically speaking, it was probably a mistake to respond that you love her as well. It is okay to feel that way, but you don't say it to a person who broke up with you recently. You wait for them to make the move.

It appears as though this is a classic case of:
- girl doesn't want to date anymore
- she then realizes how lonely she is
- she needs ego reinforcement/a sense that someone wants her
- she texts her ex until he caves in and gives her what she needs
- attention=granted, she backs off again

You want her back, right? You want practical advice? Do NOT contact this girl until she starts calling you. MAYBE an occasional and short response to a text message (but do not respond to emotional texts). Then, if you still want to have her when she starts calling, answer the phone, be brief but polite, and be the first to hang up. "Oh, hey, I have to go. It was good talking to you." You can do this 3 or maybe 4 times (don't answer every time she calls, though. You can text back the next day: "Hey, I saw your call from last night. What's up?") If she initiates a meet-up, tell her you can't make that. Then propose an alternative. Ideally, the alternative is something you were going to do anyway ("You know, I'm going to get some coffee at this joint that just opened. We could meet there.") Then meet at the appropriate time and place, have a back-up excuse (I gotta go wash my hair) and be the first to leave. If you like the vibe of that "date," make another one.

That is about as practical as I can get. But you need to ask yourself: why bother with a girl who doesn't want you and strings you along emotionally when you can be out practicing your game?

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -


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