Deep depression



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 Post subject: Deep depression
PostPosted: Sun Jan 24, 2016 12:07 pm 
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My gf just ended our more than 7 years of relationship, I'm 25 years old, we have been together since we finished high school. I posted a topic before this happened on the general topics forum, you can read more if you want here: general-questions/life-stuck-facebook-f ... 94680.html. This time she will not return, because the things have happened in a different way, she has been ignoring me completely, not answering my calls, texts, turning off her phone. She told me that she didn't want to see me anymore, not even as a friend. The last time we talked she told me about all my defects, she told me that I was only a man to fuck her, but not a man for other things such as: surprising her (I'm not sure what she means), telling her to go out on weekends instead of spending time studying, she told me I was not man enough because I do not have a life, do not have work like others, because I was all day on the computer, also that I am anti-social (I do not want to be like that, I actually want to make friends, but it is not that easy, everyone has already made a life).
As I mentioned on the other post, she fucked another guy about 2 years ago, and I had a difficult time recovering the mental pain. When that happened she first told me she didn't had more feelings for me anymore, and that she wanted to try new things. At that time she was like 23 years old and the guy about 30. She was coming back to me after 3 weeks, crying and telling me that she didn't feel good with that guy in the bed because he lacked of the emotional part. So this time, she told me that she doesn't want to know anything about men, and that I should make a life without her. I have a deep depression this time, I can't get a word from her and this time seems to be more serious. I feel lonely, and depressed and need help.
7 years have created bonds between us, I want to recover her. I don't know what to do, what step to take. I'm afraid if stop contacting her and then she fucks another guy again, I'm not sure if she is interested in someone else because she was acting normally the day before we broke up. I do not understand why she changed so dramatically. Please, give me some help, I want to make a life as mentioned on the other post, but also fix things with her because it is not that easy to live without her.


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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Sun Jan 24, 2016 8:17 pm 
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Look.

Harsh truths firsts... Forget about your girlfriend, there are guys who look for red flags in relationship, fucking another dude and then saying that she didn't even like him because he was emotionally unavailable (or whatever) doesn't make a red flag, it's fucking unbelievable you let this slide man.
Quote:
she told me I was not man enough because I do not have a life, do not have work like others, because I was all day on the computer, also that I am anti-social.
This is why she cheated, girls want man who has a desire in his life, women tell you they want to be your n1 in life, but you have to have some kind of a goal, not sitting on you PC all day jerking around. It's weak, women don't go for weak man. I'm even suprised how your relationship lasted this long if you were like this all the time.
Quote:
I'm afraid if stop contacting her and then she fucks another guy again.
Look. Another harsh truth, she probably will. You were like a prison to her, she wants out, chances are she probably cheated on you not only once. You have to get in control of your life.
Quote:
Start developing your hobbies, start going to gym, start running, start reading books about self-help (there IS NO SHAME in that, I read them all the time), start making parties and start participating more often in parties (I'm in college and there is a party 5 times a week), get drunk, get new haircut... ETC.. ETC.. My point is = start socializing.
Quote:
I'm not sure if she is interested in someone else because she was acting normally the day before we broke up. I do not understand why she changed so dramatically.
Rare people really change to their core. She didn't change, you were just sitting in front of your PC all the time and didn't pay attention to her. You were not developing yourself, hence she left you.

All guys whos girl leaves them think "she suddenly" changed, truth is, they didn't.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 12:59 am 
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It's likely you won't think so at the moment, but this could very well be the best thing to happen to you in your life.
Quote:
She told me that she didn't want to see me anymore, not even as a friend. The last time we talked she told me about all my defects, she told me that I was only a man to fuck her, but not a man for other things such as: surprising her (I'm not sure what she means), telling her to go out on weekends instead of spending time studying, she told me I was not man enough because I do not have a life, do not have work like others, because I was all day on the computer, also that I am anti-social (I do not want to be like that, I actually want to make friends, but it is not that easy, everyone has already made a life).
She told you exactly how you were unattractive as a man. Good news for you. You have this as reference, but dig deeper. You now have the opportunity to man up. Go find the knowledge and who it is you want to be in order to be the attractive man you want to be, not for a woman, but for you.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 9:46 am 
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Life isn't always pink rainbows OP. Sometimes you gotta face some situations you really rather not. Of-course it's easier to want her back. And yes it's hard as fuck to push through the pain you're feeling right now.

Bottom line is this. Are you going to endure and become a better man for it, or will you be like 95% of the miserable people out there that choose the easy way and condemn themselves to mediocrity?

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 11:49 am 
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I went yesterday to her home and she was not there. We always met each other after her work hours, and I know the time that she finishes working and I suspect that she is already in bed with another guy. She has me blocked on her phone also. I have been crying like a girl all day long. I know is wrong, I just can't do anything else right now.


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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 3:17 pm 
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She didn't block you out of the blue.

What did you do?

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 4:00 pm 
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Quote:
My gf just ended our more than 7 years of relationship, I'm 25 years old, we have been together since we finished high school.
Yay Bro! I for one am super stoked for your future!

You've been banging the same 'ol tired pussy for 7 Years! NOW remember that hot little red head with the firm titties down at the Pick & Save you've always want to put your dick in? NOW you are FREE to do that....

-The waitress a Shoney's.
-The girl on the bus.
-The girl at the YMCA.
-The girl that makes eye-contact at the post office.
-All the ones waiting to suck that little nubbin of yours at the local watering hole!

I feel like buying you a shot right now!

Congrats!

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 8:47 pm 
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I would suggest you re-read your post. It's titled Deep Depression... and yes I and everyone else here knows how you feel... like you just got punched in the face 100 times over. We get it... it sucked... but now what are you going to do about it is the real question.

Literally 1.5 months ago my GF (HB9) of 2 year broke it off with me. I felt like you did for a solid 1 week haha... I am now seeing a higher quality girl (pretty much dating her at this point, weve been sleeping together for over a month) , happier, and life is amazing. Again, this is just a little over 2 months after a 2 year LTR.

I have gone 100% no contact with my ex... if she chooses to break up... then she is choosing the wrong road. Her loss... and everytime you try and re-connect it just pushes her further and further away.


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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:35 am 
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Please read me!

Do this(because nobody what so ever told me this): get some nice pictures and start online dating.

1)Read on online dating. Today you will find the most attractive girls online, simple because it's less cliché and bigger than ever before. 80% of the users in Tinder, seeks actually a romantic relationship. You will find that percentage far less when you go out(if you want relationship that is)
2)It is so crucial that you get some great pictures. That is where you game starts. You can read guides about this.
3)After few days I promise you that you will feel better, as you learn new people. When you learn new people, you will see how big the world is.

Good luck man.


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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:44 am 
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Read the thread in my signature. The ex one. It contains everything that I just wrote (and deleted) in this post, lol.

PS, do it to move on, not to get her back.

Edit: She makes it 100% obvious that she doesn't want to talk to you, and you go on to call her over and over to the point that you can say "she's ignoring my calls" (plural)? You can't convince a woman to come back to you by calling her over and over again. Infact, you can't convince her with anything. If she did answer, what would you do? Beg? Persuade? Give perfect logical explanations as to why you're such a good couple, and list out amazing reasons why it'll be different this time?

The first thing wrong with that is that it's not entirely your fault.

But the second, and main thing wrong with that is that women aren't like men. Men do things based on logic and reason; they follow their brain. Women do things based on emotion and they live in the moment; they follow their heart. This is why guys get so confused with "Last week she said she really loved me, now she says she hates me and she's already with a new guy?" That's because she loved the guy in THAT moment.

As for making new friends... to be honest I don't have many myself. I have one close friend and a couple of friends at college. My "work" is at home on the computer. I will say though, the fact that people have "made lives" is all the more reason why it's easy to make friends! If you want friends that badly, then do as the suggested article says and take up a new hobby/get back to an old one. Let's say you want to learn Spanish... take a Spanish class - classmates become friends. Do you not have any old friends you could catch up with? Go out with them and their friends, socialise, have a good time and make new friends.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Tue Jan 26, 2016 2:34 am 
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Quote:
She told me that she didn't want to see me anymore, not even as a friend.
Quote:
I went yesterday to her home and she was not there.
You are reinforcing her not wanting to be with you anymore and strengthening her resolve. Your texts, phone calls, and visits are doing nothing but telling her that she was right to drop you in the first place.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Tue Jan 26, 2016 9:35 am 
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You're free bro. This is a blessing in disguise. Time to start pounding some fresh pussy.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 1:48 pm 
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I've recently broken up with my ex after five years, it was a clean brake-up and even though we don't speak by my own choice, I believe we shouldn't speak to our ex's until we are truly free from them. Which will take time, some people say go fuck 5 women and you'll forget about her. unfortunately this didn't work for me, what is working for me is bettering myself I'm concentrating on my body, my education and PUA again. It's taken a couple of months to realise it but there is this great big world with so much to give you just have to go out and get it. I still think of her from time to time even dream of her, but when I first split up I thought that id never find anyone better she was the 'perfect' girl. But after coming on this forum to seek advice, the advice I got was there is always better out there always. Which the more I speak to people the more I understand the advice, I've met/spoken to some amazing women and not just the ones I'm trying to game.

The advice you've already received is harsh but it's true and very much needed. Even your ex girlfriend has told you some harsh truth and you have to respect her honesty regardless of how much it hurt. But the golden thing here you've been given advice from a woman and you've seen what they find attractive, so you have only yourself now to sort this problem out. Start the gym, get a hobby, get even more educated there is soo much you can do and if you enjoy sitting on your computer make time for that also, but it's not healthy just sitting there. Look at it this way, you have one benefit which a lot of men don't you have this community with an abundance of knowledge and experience.

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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 8:09 pm 
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Kind of sounds like shes been seeing someone else already, from what i read. And also if you were living your life the way she described< you can't really blame her. That stuffs cool in high, but I mean you have to live a little bit man. Girls like to be take out, like to be surprised, fucked in the back of your car etc... On the bright side of things you must be laying down some pretty good pipe for her to stick around that long lol. Just work on the other aspects of your life be more social and get someone hotter.


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 Post subject: Re: Deep depression
PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:55 pm 
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Simple advice, forget her for now, grow up and be a man. Meaning get some life goals and pursue them with focus and discipline. That is what women find attractive and what makes you ultimately happy. It's great you had a seven year relationship, but clearly she has left you behind because you didn't grow. I don't blame her.


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