You SDL'd her and she has a 6 year old son.

Nothing against girls who fuck on the first day (I love them), but let's be honest being serious about a relationship with them unless it's strictly sexual is a little stupid.

I get the feeling this one seems to have a past too, which may be why she goes hot and cold on you. Just don't go into it with her and get caught up on this.

If it were me, I would stay out of her personal life and just get as much good casual sex with this girl as possible and then find a way to break it off nicely when it gets boring.

She is not one for the long term I can tell you that.

Ok now I just read your last post.

Fuck the sex, it's not even worth that and will probably cause more problems down the line lol

Just get the fuck out of this relationship and move on bro, she has way too many problems that are nothing to do with you.

He needs to go on Jeremy Kyle

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I'm not planning on marrying her and she's not into marriage also but I do enjoy sleeping with her and I will be in the same city as her till February so I would like to continue sleeping with her. Also though not marriage material she is quite fun.

Ever heard of a fuck buddy? Do you know what an LTR is?

Not all girls want to get pregnant and be Facebook official

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We're not FWB but we both know we're not going to be together forever. We agreed to be together as long as we're happy. So when I talked to her she mentioned she's worried about a number of things like work and finding a place to live, getting pregnant again, missing her kid etc. And that she needs space since we've been sleeping on the same bed every night for the last one week.

So is the best move just to wait for her to contact me and move on with my life? Should I expect that it's over now?

So here's an update on what happend next.

So 3 weeks ago she asked me if she can stay at my place for a few days. I said sure. That evening she called me for dinner and a female friend of hers was also there. I was laughing having a good time, teasing her and making friends with her female friend. We have dinner then I take them for some cocktails. Time to go home and she says she's not coming with me and she's going to stay with her friend since her friend just got back in town and is going through some urgent issues she wanted to discuss. I was not happy since it had been 2 or 3 weeks since we last had sex or slept on the same bed with each other. I told her to come with me, she said no so I laughed and told her I'm going to find a new girlfriend and just left.

On my way back home she's texting me saying she's on her period so we can't have sex. I told her that's fine I'll find another girlfriend and I just ignored her. She then calls me like 10 times in an hour and eventually I pick up and told her to come. She comes and we have amazing sex.

That week she invites me for lunch a few days later. I ask her to come to my house since I want to have sex but she doesn't come. I act cool with that and leave.

Two weeks ago she again invites me for dinner with her female friend and tells me she wants to spend the night in my house since she is away for a week. I say cool. She comes to my house but as soon as I initiate sex she says she doesn't want to do it and threatens to leave if I persist. I stay cool and just massage her for an hour and try to get her horny. She says she's scared of getting pregnant again. Anyway she gets horny and we again have great sex. She said I have good skills in bed and seemed happy.

Now last week, I was helping her find a flat to rent so I found something and accompanied her to see the place. We had lunch together. It was fine. Later I texted her to come to my house but she says she doesn't want to come since she is scared of getting pregnant and can't control herself when sleeping on the same bed as me. I'm just getting quite tired at the difficulty it takes to get her to come to my house and have sex. I told her we will use condoms or not even have sex, just do oral etc. I told her earlier that day that I'm leaving our city in 6 weeks permanently so I want to spend time with her. She didn't come so I told her I'm feeling angry.

I didn't contact her much over the rest of the week. On Saturday I invited her for dinner with my colleagues and as usual she says she's busy. She found a flat to stay so busy with that. I just felt so tired dealing with a girlfriend who doesn't make time to spend with me so I decided to end it. I told her I wanted to talk. I told her that I'm unhappy. She asked if it was something she did. I told her I need someone who can make more time to be with me. We only live 10 minutes away and I know she's busy with her PhD, I also did a PhD and no one is so busy that they can't spend a few nights with their boyfriend. I also told her that she acts very selfishly and inconsiderately, hardly gives any affection, highly inflexible about anything and everything. Also I told her I feel that she just uses me to do things for like order things for her, find her a flat etc. I told her I understand she went through a lot with the abortion and I tried to support her over the last 2 1/2 months as much as I could but things don't seem to be getting better.

She said she agreed to the break up and that she's sorry she made me feel that way. She said she doesn't want a boyfriend, having a boyfriend is annoying and her son and ex husband are coming next month from her home country and she doesn't know how she can deal with the situation [She only divorced in April, a few months before we got together i.e. June though she had been living in another country than her ex for 1 1/2 years]. She also says that she is older than me and has a kid and that I can find someone more suitable for me. I said I agree, I told her I'll find someone else and that we're not compatible. I wished her well for the future. I said I hoped she finds someone good. She said that she doesn't want any man.

This happend 3 days ago and we haven't contacted each other since. For future information and assuming I wanted her to come back to me:

- If she refuses to come over because she says she is scared of getting pregnant what's the best way to react? I know we need to try to change her emotions rather than use logic? So is the best strategy to create more attraction somehow?

- If your girlfriend is going through a hard time how can you be supportive without being a doormat? I feel I gave her too much time and effort trying to find a flat for her, ordering books etc. for her, when she came to my house I would get her whatever fruits or food she wanted.

- Would it have been better if I hadn't told her why I was breaking up with her instead of blurting out everything and attacking her?

- Was her choosing to go stay with her female friend instead of me a shit test, disrespect, concern for her friend or fear of having sex with me and getting pregnant again?

- Do you guys think I was too needy?

Wait... You want to be with her? Why did you break up then

Sick of these useless therapy threads recently.

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I broke up with her because she's hardly seeing me anyway and I'm hardly getting any sex and it just got too frustrating for me so I'd rather just focus on other women unless she comes back. I'm not planning on contacting her again though. So the ball is in her court.

I want to learn from my mistakes so could anyone give me some advice on the following three points:

- If she refuses to come over because she says she is scared of getting pregnant/ or gives some other excuse as to why doesn't want or can't have sex what's the best way to react?

- If your girlfriend is going through a hard time how can you be supportive without being a doormat?

- When breaking up is it better not to tell her why I am breaking up with her instead of blurting out everything and attacking her (assuming you want to leave the door open in case she decides to come back)?

To answer your questions, I can just tell you what I would do.

1. If I was raw dogging and she had to get an abortion, I'd just stop rawdogging. If it was a condom accident, she'd get on bc. Firstly, if a chick had to get an abortion for me, I would probably be afraid to have sex with her for a while anyway. Call me crazy, I'm just not sex crazed to jump back into fucking after almost being tied to a chick for life due to a kid. After that passed, if she needs some time, fine. If it lasts for too long, then goodbye relationship.

2. Be supportive while doing your own thing. Like dont be needy

3. I'd probably tell her why I'm breaking up. Why break up with someone if you want to leave the door open?

None of this really applies to your situation though. Like for point 2, how could you give her space and NOT be needy when you started off needy. You were already a doormat, with her not seeing your parents and her running things. How could you leave the door open when she wasn't trying to see you in the first place?

It's harsh to say but I'll be honest. You were a bridge. She wasn't that into you. She was in a rough place, needed someone to be there for her. So someone willing to come to her parents house, help her order stuff and move on her schedule, and she'd just give him sex once in a while. She wouldnt come meet your parents because she wasn't that serious about things.

A trend I notice on this forum, is many guys make shit too complicated. You just want to fuck a chick, just fuck her. Don't be texting her all day and doing 10 dates, either you go for what you want or you find someone else. Likewise, you were serious about a chick that wasn't serious about you. If sex was important to you, find a girl without a kid. A phd student with a kid, who lives at her parents? That's a tough sell to have a good sex life with.

Know what you want. If it was sex you wanted, dont be with a chick with a kid, a 33 year old overweight body, no place and who isn't flexible. If you want a relationship, dont be with a chick who is busy all the time, doesnt want to meet your parents or do something to make you happy, or who there is a big age difference with. So you picked badly for sex, and for a relationship. She got the stability she needed, now her ex is probably gonna get back with her. A bridge. Nothing wrong with being a bridge, but get what you want from it. Your emotional and sexual needs weren't met. I mean, do you really think the abortion scare stuff was real? Do you really think she wasn't talking to her ex. 9 times out of 10, she was talking to him for a while, stopped having sex with you so she could fuck him conscience clear and pussy tight when he comes down.

In simple terms, if she aint fucking you, she probably doesn't like you that much. If she aint meeting your parents to make you happy, she's already planning to break up with you. You cant control people but you can control your investment. If she wasn't meeting your parents, she could find her own apartment. For me, a fwb does certain things ie fuck. A gf does certain things, ie fuck and so nice shit etc. If a girl isn't filling one of those roles, I'm not gonna fill the caring bf role. So for your next relationship or fwb or whatever, focus on your happiness. Because as you can see from this woman, she got what she wanted out of it. While you didnt.

She's an alpha female. I date alpha females because I like a confident woman and don't like betas.

Sometimes alpha chicks are overbearing because they're used to giving orders at work. But you don't want to become the beta in the relationship.

Alpha females want to feel feminine and they want to be with a laid-back guy who is a humble alpha.

Everything doesn't have to be planned. Tell her you have the evening planned. Take her to the places you want to go. If she complains or objects when you're there tell her she isn't being appreciative. If she doesn't change her tune call her a brat. Tease her. Don't let her get to her.

When you know how to deal with alpha females and know how to handle the power struggle it's a beautiful thing. A guy can't walk on these women (which I love) but you can be her equal.

Damn, I love alpha chicks. They tend to be loyal. And they're often so confident and passionate and can banter. If you need more advice or have questions, ask away.

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Yes she's an alpha female. Everything is on her own terms. She does what she wants, when she wants. She know where she wants to eat, when she wants to see me and will not compromise. There's not much point in asking her to come see me or go eat out with me because if she wanted to do that she would have already asked. She constantly likes to say no. Whenever she wants to see me she expects I'm there for her but it does not work the other way around.

She is aloof but contacts me just enough and gives the bare minimum scraps of affection at random intervals just to keep me around.

The way I handled this was just to let her come to me and live my own life but I don't think I can handle such selfish and inflexible behaviour in the long run. How do you handle such women so that you also get what you want?

No - women want a man to LEAD. And women HATE having to ask or tell a man what she wants him to do. Alpha women want a man with a plan. I quickly learned this when I was 23 and was dating a 29-year-old alpha female. She literally spelled it out for me and told me everything I've been saying.

What do you do? Easy. I'll even outline it in a story. Like you, my ex wore the pants. She played the dominant, masculine role.

I remember one evening she took a shower and we started watching a movie (Mr. 3000 - man, that movie sucked) asked she asked if I would massage her scalp for her. I did, and after the movie she has a fit and tells me her hair is tangled because of me and that I did it on purpose.

I was irate as it was the most ridiculous accusation. I told her off, took my stuff and left.

Driving home she calls me acting like a b-tch and I tell her off again. Her tone changes 100% and she asks me to return to her place. I did and she's seriously waiting for me in her bed, naked. She tells me she wants me to f--k her and c-m inside her. I was so taken aback. At the time it made 0 sense to the point I wouldn't c-m inside her because I thought it was a trap. lol

Looking back, she was merely trying to condition me to take the lead, be an alpha and not take her crap. Women want a man they can respect - and being an agreeable wuss-bag who was passive certainly didn't work.

Roughly a month later I dumped her, discovered Facebook (this was 2004) and began f-cking USC girls to the point of no return.

Again, with alpha females it's all about respect. They want to feel feminine and they want a man who is masculine. Of course, don't ever disrespect an alpha female or try to act dominant. Alpha women tend to end up with alpha males who are laid-back and 100% comfortable in their own skin.

Women follow a man's lead. This is true from the beginning. Through our actions we show them what's going to happen, what we expect, how and why.

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Update:

So since the breakup 2 weeks ago I haven't initiated contact. She messaged me a few times and called once about some random soundcloud playlist she is making. I don't really engage in much conversation with her, just remain polite and concise.

On friday she calls and asks me to dinner with her female friend who is new in town. 2 of my guy friends are in town for the weekend so I take them along. She pays for dinner and I tell the two girls that we're going to see some of my friends (mexican girls) for a gig and that they can come along if they want. They agree so I take them to the gig.

So I met the mexican girl we were meeting at the gig during day game a week ago and I do like her. She's got a nice body but not as pretty as my ex. So we get to the gig and I introduce everyone. The mexican girl has brought 3 of her female friends (one of whom I know) and a guy. At the gig I'm very social, joking around with these girls especially the one I like, there's some basic kino like hugging etc all in front of my ex who is being very dull and quiet behind us.

I enjoy talking and being around the mexican girl so I keep next to her most of the time and pay very little attention to my ex. After a few hours my ex and her friend leave, I kiss her on the cheek and say bye.

I know my ex was a bit upset and my two guy friends tell me I was a complete d*ck to her flirting in front of her with other women. I know it's not nice to hurt people but she's the one who says she's not ready for a relationship and wants to be single and having a boyfriend is "annoying".

I honestly enjoyed talking and hanging next to the mexican girl more than my ex but yeah I acted with the knowledge that my ex would get jealous, childish I know but it was her choice to end things.

My friends think I should text my ex and apologize for not spending much time with her. Did I overdo the jealousy thing a bit too much?