Hello everyone,

I been seeing this lovely older women for 3 months. She is 16 years older than me. She sent this email to me today, so I’m anticipating some serious talk between us soon.

“I love sharing things with you. There many things I want to talk with you about especially since things have progressed very fast between us. This has been a challenge for me, because I have been alone emotionally and physically for a very long time. Longer than 10 years.”

Her ex wasn’t there for her physically and emotionally. Right now we’re basically good friends with benefits. We never talked about relationship before. She just went through a divorce 4 years ago and has a daughter. We see each other 3-4 times a month for dancing, concerts, and sex.

Initially we were to be dance partners only, but we became intimate in 2 weeks. She also sent this message to her close friend two days ago. It's ironic I read this message, because she sent it from my computer and didn’t close the email.

“I in the process of needing to do something about my "younger man" as it has progressed more than I am comfortable with and now it is awkward, especially since it sounds like he has had very little dating experience in his life.

Any advice on how to deal with the upcoming situation is appreciated. Thanks in advance.

do you want a relationship with her or just continued sex?

I would like to continue to be FWB with her. We never talked about what we wanted from each other and what type of relationship we're in. We went with the flow and had a great time. She said I was the first man she's been with intimately since her divorce 4 years ago.

It's complicated because we message each other everyday, but this was the first week she didn't respond daily, and now she wants to "talk." It's possible I been giving her too much attention, and she wants more space in her life.

She also said that she was looking for a dance partner without the sex, but our attraction took her by surprise.

Hot daughter?

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LOL I never met the daughter yet, and she's underage. We have fun at my place. I never been to hers possibly because of the daughter.

If you just want FWB then I would ignore most of what she is telling you and just send fun and flirty texts on occasion over the next week or two, then try to re-initiate a meetup for sex. The main thing is dont try to change the context and structure of the relationship or things will not end well.

Detox, that's great advice on not changing the structure of the relationship. It was always light hearted and fun between us. Her pattern of behaviour changed this week and she brought up serious talk. She's just found a dance school school she really liked, so it's possible that she doesn't want a FWB dance partner anymore. I'm quite sure there's no other man in her life right now.

She might be coming over tonight for a couple of hours. I'll be playful and initiate sex. If she wants to talk we'll talk.

sounds good, these type of relationships just tend to have an expiration date on them. The ones that ive personally dealt with I tried to just keep it as playful and innocuous as possible and then, even if it ends, they can comfortably re-initiate when they are /single/horny/feeling less slutty/ again.