The current situation I'm in is that I like this girl who is in the friendzone and would like to get in a relationship with her.

I've known her for 3 months and recently found myself liking her. She is a party friend who I only see at parties about once every two weeks.

I'm 26 and she is 20

yesterday at a party I decided to make my move and tell her that I had a crush on her and wanted to take her on a date.

transcript of words used when doing this

[at this stage of the night everyone had gotten settled into the party]
me: you want to hear something crazy
girl: yes
me: it's really crazy and could ruin your night
girl: I don't want to hear it

[later on when the party was about to die down]
me: I'm going to tell you the crazy thing and don't care if it ruins your night cause the night is almost over
her: ...
me: i have a crush on you
her: I knew you were going to say that
me: since when
her: since you said it could ruin my night
then the girl goes on to say 2 other guys at the party also have crushes on her. I know these guys are nothing to worry about because they are even more in the friendzone than me (have been friends with her for 5 years) and they are also really beta.

Then I drove the girl home and i go out of the car to say goodbye, she hugs me and I say into her ear
me: remember what I said about you earlier
her: yes
me: we should go on a date
her with a smile: we'll definitely hang out


Now how do you think I handled myself in the situation and what should my next move be? I will definitely see the girl at a party in a week and a half away and just she just messaged me asking if I was going to a party tonight. Should I keep asking for the date or should i just try to touch her more the next time i see her? i think we already know each other enough which defeats the purpose of a date.

I think you did allright from what you describe, even if you could have done a little better. When you said "it is going to ruin your night" you didn't have the right frame, as if you are not worthy her. Instead you could have said "it will be the best thing you have ever heard", with the mindset that you are the shit.

About your next move... Only ask her about the date once more, and when you do, give her a concrete suggestion on time and place. If she declines you have passed the ball to her, and it is her responsibility to give you a suggestion instead.

She seems interested though, since she was asking you if you "were going to a party tonight". If it wasn't obvious to you, that was a hint that she wants to see you again. If I were you I would go out on that date ASAP, because that is what she wants. Obviously.

Turns out you were wrong about that but it's an easy mistake considering its hard to get the full context through an online message board.

OK so what has happened so far after asking her out for a date for the first time:

The girl was more attentive to me and wanted to hang out more and she tried arranging more events where we could hang out. The problem was it was never just me and her, there was always other people

I ended up asking her on a date again and she just went silent.

It looks like we are friendzoned again. I'm guessing the reason the girl wanted to hang out more was because in the past a friend of hers tried to commit suicide over having a crush on a girl and she didn't want to hurt me in the same way. After the girl found out I was an emotionally strong person she told me she wasn't keen.

I guess I'm not her type and it seems like this girl is really independent and dosn't need a boyfriend.

I guess my plan to to try once again and if I fail the best thing might be to just move on however hard that is.

I think you really chose good words but the frame you use is kinda beta...

I mean she has the power to decide where your relationship is going and this should never be the case. She should be leaded. Good thing ist that beside the beta frame you used you still can recover because i think with how you delivered you frame it can easily be changed into alpha. I would not ask her anymore for a date. On the next party you are with here, you should value up in front of her by flirting other girls etc. I think she enjoys your company more than of the other guys that are into her, which you should use to your advantage. With this in mind you definately should use the party to get closer to her and not any "neutral" ground. After DHVing on the party start kino, be cocky funny and neg her. But never talk about your crush.. No more words, just behavior and kino escalation.

Keep us up do date

Cheers

sky
lets-go-skyrocket-vt174976.html

Bad new for me.

One of the betas mentioned above confessed to the girl the he loved her. Now the girl is completely creeped out and definitely does not want a guy. Also the beta has attempted suicide before over a girl so this girl definitely wont be looking for a guy in the near future.

The girl still wants to be friends though and still wants to party with me. How should I act around her? Also how much time needs to go past before I make another move?

Make her geleous, flirt with other girls at the party , and don't txt her!

Never come right out and tell a woman you "have a crush on her" or that you're interested. That instantly kills any chance of her being attracted to you. Instead, relay it with your actions, voice tonality, and body language. These concepts aren't something that can be described in a single post, so do some research and learn as much as you can. Unfortunately things are pretty much dead in the water with this girl, but at least you'll know for next time.

Sounds like good advice. Something to learn for next time.

Does this mean I'm friend-zoned for life or will there be a time when I can go for her again? I know the best option is to move on and I will do but I just want to know all the facts so I can make the best decision

It's impossible to be friendzoned for life as you place yourself in the friendzone, girls will never place a guy in the friendzone. Its ALWAYS the guys fault if he ends up there.

I advise removing yourself from her life. Just go concentrate on building your game up as it obviously isn't that good. Go out, meet other girls (THERE ARE A LOT!) get numbers and train yourself to be good at this shit. Then 2-3 months, sling this girl a text that simply says "Hey, we should meet up. I'm going for drinks soon. Join"

If you think you're in the friendzone remove yourself from their lives for an extended period of time. Ignore texts, ignore facebook, ignore everything. If people ask you about her just say "ah shes alright" or something vague like that.

I'm sort of in the same boat, although I feel the way you worded your crush revelation was kind of weak.

I recently revealed to a friend that I just got reacquainted with that I had hoped she was single after she told me she's talking to a guy. She said we have bad luck because when one of us is in a relationship, the other is not and vice versa. I kept my cool, took it in stride, and moved on to the next topic. We're still going to hang out, even though she admitted she has high hopes for this guy.

My plan is to keep her as a friend and maybe have her as a wingman (see my thread in Questions, I need help with this). I'm not going to get my hopes up for her, I will continue my quest for Alpha status, so if she eventually comes around, I may give her a shot with me.

_________________
"You ain't accustomed of going through customs. You ain't been nowhere, huh?"

Yeah my game is pretty bad. Can someone point me to the basic fundamentals in improving my game? I guess linking me to the articles that you found the most useful to you would help.

Make her your wing. That way she's helping you with your game. As you get better at it...she will start to see your value. Then you can be playful with her and say, "that could have been you."

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com

I didn't really read articles just sort of seeked advice and help on this forum and went and practiced it. The more you get rejected the more you figure out it out. Overall personally I just discovered that A) I needed to improve my inner game which I have B) If you want her as a girlfriend then be honest if you want to just fuck her be honest but game her. C) NEVER REACT D) You are the prize, not her. She only becomes the prize when you're banging her.

One of the main problems with your interaction is that you make it into a big deal that your going to tell her you like her. Girls don't like this. What you should have done is had fun with her at the party, lead her around, show her how fun you are then get talking and kino (touch her) as you're talking. Then when you drove her home should have gone for a k-close then said something like "I'm taking you out later in the week. Il let you know when I'm free" or tried to F-Close if you got the balls.

My no1 rule is never tell a girl you like her, show her you like her. My most recent girl told me she liked me (thus why I'm seeing her) and I like her but I still haven't told her I like her, I've banged her, made her scream and such but she still hasn't heard it from my mouth. Thus when I'm not there she'll think about me. "Does he like me? he seems to blahblahblah" a girl thinking about you even negatively is better then not at all.

I know the feeling. As soon as you asked her on a date and her response wasn't yes and instead "yeah, we'll hang out" I knew it was the sign that she wasn't interested. Seen this quite a bit.

At this point, don't give her much attention. Then if she starts showing interest, only turn it up the smallest amount and continue not going out of your way for her.

Also, never say crush as an adult... or tell a girl "you like her". Things should be happening between you two before you discuss that stuff.

You seem to have good game, I'd like to hear more advice from you. What did you mean by if you want her as a girlfriend he honest? Should I go up to her tomorrow and tell her I want her as my girlfriend?

A couple recent developments.

1. I might have taken one step forward and then one step backwards.

- I stopped contact with the girl for 1 week but somehow she found out about a party that my friends were going to and asked if she could go with me.
- Since telling her I had a crush on her we were both trying hard to impress each other but at this party we both didn't care anymore and both just acted sloppy. I ended up driving her home drunk. This sloppyness broke the awkwardness of her wanting to be just friends.
- The next day she texted me asking me to get lunch with her. I gave her a specific time and place to meet. I misread this, she didn't want a lunch date, she was just wondering if I was in town at that specific time and if so join her because she was just about to get lunch.

2. The beta that confessed his love for the girl tells my friend group his story.

- Currently no one knows that I like this girl or that I have asked her out except for me and her.
- All the parties that we go to are set up by my friends. The girl and the beta started as outsiders to the group but have recently become part of the group since we've all hung out enough now.
- I'm the person in the group closest to the girl. Now before every event she goes to, she asks me if the beta is there before she makes an appearance and will not show if he is there unless it is a major party
- The beta today told my friend group that things are awkward between him and the girl because he told her that he loves her and that shes does not feel the same way.
- The girl will probably want to know this piece of information.
- A major party is happening tomorrow and both the beta and the girl will be there even though they know that the other person is also going.

I feel like somehow I can exploit the beta telling his story and the amount of information I know to my advantage with the girl. I'm not sure what my next move is. But I also feel like if I keep informing this girl on whether the beta is at each event or not that I'm her bitch. I also feel like if I don't appear at these events or not message her back that it will be too obvious that i'm trying to avoid her. Another alpha in my group tried to get with her through keno and got shut down and is now not returning her texts. This approach isn't working out for him as this girl has self respect and thinks the guy is a complete douche now.

How do I handle this? Keep in mind, I'm not even completely sure of this but it does seem logical, that this girl probably doesn't want a guy at this time given the situation.