| Sex the night before helps. It gives you that King Shit spark.
Anyway,
Hot neighbor messages me at my morning coffee. "Do you have coffee?"
Heywood; "Nope, just had last cup!"
Her; "Dang it"
Her 5 minutes later "Any milk?"
Heywood; "For boobs?"
Her; "You know I have a b/f! I just need a little"
Heywood; "Only have a little"
She comes over, with a bowl of dry cereal, helps herself to the last of my milk, plops her ass on my couch (tank top no bra, yoga pants, thong)
Heywood; "where is b/f?"
Her; "Sleeping still"
Heywood; "Take off your shirt then"
Her;Big ass grin "YOU KNOW I CAN"T" Still grinning.
Heywood; "Get out then"
She pouts, finish cereal, and is walking out the door.
Heywood; "Milk ain't free bitch!" Smiling.
She looks over shoulder, grins again, pulls the back of her pants down and flashes her ass.
Where was I going with this........?
Oh yeah, NOW I'm fired up.
1. I have to meet my daughter for "Brunch" To meet her B/F's parents...boring. I even got a stern warning not to be myself! lol.
At the restaurant, the waitress takes drink orders. Provides our drinks.
Takes everyone's food order, I'm last. The final thing she asks is. "would you like anything else?'
Fuck sake they ALL ask that every time!
Heywood; "I'd like a high five please", and assume the position. She gets a giant smile on and high fives me!
I get the best service at the table, always 1st, lots of general banter.
When she brings our bill, I wright "Hi 5" in the tip line ( But still tip 20%).
When she gives me back my copy, boom there is a number on it!
Later......
2. I'm on my way to an open house for a high school graduate.
I stop to get fuel, ($4 a gallon the fuckers) There is an HB7 at the next pump on the other side, about to swipe her card at the same time as me ( Full on DDs long blond hair).
It gave us both the option of a car wash;
Heywood; "They should come out and wash it free by, hand right now!"
Her; "No shit right?"
Heywood; "For $4 it should be a b/j!"
Giant laughter.
I bend into my vehicle to grab something off the seat, when I turned back around I saw she was still looking at me.
Heywood; Where you checking out my ass?"
Her; "Good luck with your car wash."
Heywood; "You were huh?'
Her; "Maybe"
Heywood; "Here wright your number on this."
Open house..........
3. HB8 mousey brown 35ish cougar looking type.
Heywood; "Hi there I'm Uncle Heywood!"
End. .... (Text messaging gas station one just now)
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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.
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