Wow, that is hilarious! I'm definitely going to use that the next time anyone asks me that, regardless of what I think.

I actually think a lot of these lines are good, you just need to say them in a joking manner...here is mine, approaching a girl wearing stripes

Me: Don't stripes make you look fat?
HBStripes: Are you calling me fat?

I literally had nothing to say...and walked away

Wow you cock blocked your own self!

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If you hesitate, you masturbate!

i am the stereotype of the psychopathic desperado who will just shout out anything that comes to my mind, so im really not sure what the stupidest thing ive said is, and i dont think i wanna know what it is.

I'd been watching South Park most of the day when a hot girl from school I vaguely knew came near me. Sensing I had to say something because we'd both acknowledged each other I paused, then said "Howdy ho"

Alarm bells went CRAZY in my head, and all she could do was look at me with a blank look.

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Nothing less.

HS Days!
*breaking up with girlfriend over phone*

Me: "Hey I think we should just be friends"
Her: "Ummm... if that's what you want...(in a hesitant voice)"
Me: "Ya.. at least it was fun while it lasted!"
Her: "Uhhhh...." *hangup*

Her and her friends did not like me much after that...

I got two.

First from high school.

HER: Do you think I'm fat.
ME: Yeah...

The next one was something I tried about 20 times in a single day before I decided it didn't work.

LJ: Hey, what's a better way to start a conversation with a girl, directly - where you just walk up and tell them what's on your mind, or indirectly where you ask them a question about something?
HB: ...directly?
LJ: Ok, let me try that again then. (turning away and then turning back) Hey, wanna come home and have sex with me?
HB: No thanks

So I was talking to an hb9 that I was gaming in a club. This girl was into me and then this happens:

So on tv they were showing models on the catwalk wearing lingerie so she asks me something and I'm like "sssssshhtt I'm watching hot girls over there" so she walks away and I'm like uuuuuuuhhh crap did I just say that?

Should've seen her face , facial expression was priceless

It's a serious problem to avoid saying inside jokes that she won't get or if she does get she might think you're nerdy. Although that isn't always true, some girls really like south park and they will think it's "cool" that you "love" it as well.

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If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

There was this girl I was in love with in high school...

One day I said to her:

"Guided through my animalistic instincts I have noticed that your breast has grown"

Well, her boobies still werent that big and that seemed to be a bit of an issue of her... She didn't talk to me for 3 years... (really...)

Another thing was after the apocalypse opener, the one where you ask relative straight forward: "Wanna come home to me?" - Her answer was maybe, so I was still in the game. But then I said "You're dancing like a clown"

... She was very upset....

this happened at work.

the girl is ugly and we're talking about what to do with the fresh produce which usually gets covered with something before knocking off for the night.
there's a couple other people around

HER - What do i do with the bag?

Me - Not thinking whatsoever. Why dont you put it over your face.

lmao, she never spoke to me after that which made for some awkward shifts

This is when I was really young. I got this line from watching the cartoon secret squirrel and wanted to use it. So this girl was laughing about something and I said "whats so funny fatso?" Needless to say she started crying immediately. I didn't think it would matter because she wasn't fat, guess I was wrong.

on holiday last year i drank a fishbowl of cocktails to myself so i was pretty pissed. I seen my two friends talking to 2 girls on hearing they were from london i walked over pushed my mate outa the way and said "Here whats the traffic like in london" the girls said what kind of chat up lines that and every1 was in stitches and we just walked out lol.

my friend also said to a girl 1 time is it sweet that i wank over you and ended up having sex with her lol.

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Pimpin Aint Easy
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That reminds me of Dave Chappelle!!!! ahhh chappelle. a mans man lol.

No but that isn't a dumb thing to say at all. Good for you for telling her that.

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It don't mean a thing.
Not a goddamn thing!

i think the most stupidest thing i ever said to a girl or set of girs had to be this

we was at a club and there was a 3 set 2 hb9 and 1 hb8 and they were rejecting guys left and right. so i turned to my friend and go

me-" watch this i bet i can get them to talk and be ready to see the expression on there face, its gonna be priceless"


*walk up to the set*

me-" so i notice you rejecting all these guys, but i was wondering.. would you let me poop on your chest?"

HB9-" WTF? no way

me-" wtf you actually thought about it? your fuccin sick"

HB9#1-" me sick, you are the one that asked me"
HB8-" thats pretty gross"
*other HB9 is jsut laughing histerically*

HB9#2-" even thought that was gross i cant stop laughing, that was the most off the wall pick up line i have ever heard"

me-" it wasnt a pick up line i was being serious*makes serious face*

HB9#2-"............."

me-" aww your sick to! you really thought i was serious!"

Now at this point the people around us was just staring at us

at this point i ejected myself

me-" excuse me ladies i gotta go to the restroom"

and when i was turning around trying to hold my laugh in one of the girls said

HB?-" are you gonna find another girl to poop on?

me-" could have been you, your lost!" *waves from behind*


LOL!!! my whole goal was to get them to talk and it worked.

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"Live life to the fullest, never look back, remember No regrets" J.f

lol so what if people were staring? those chicks were into you man!