So i've been seeing this girl for a few months or so, and I like her of course.

But any time I show that I care about her, she'll take control of the relationship, ignore my calls and text, and come and go as she pleases.

The second I ignore her, she'll call me non stop, push to hang out with me, when we're together she'll hang all over me, kiss me and try to turn me on.

If I go to a club, she'll make sure she can come over afterwards, and she wants to have sex. If I tell her I'm not in the mood for sex she'll try so hard to get me in the mood.

If I am in the mood and I ask her if she wants to, she comes up with some excuse. Too tired, too cold, feels ugly, etc..

I know she feels 100% comfortable around me.

But I don't want to seem so uninterested all the time, I want to be honest with her, and if I want to hang out with her, I want to be able to call her and hang out. I hate ignoring her, because I know what it's like to be ignored.

I know why she acts this way, its because her dad wasn't around much in her life, and her stepdad didn't treat her the best. the people she surrounded herself with (her friends) parents were all split up, and had abusive 'father figures' that her friends mom's would date.

I can see a great girl underneath all of this, she has good morals and values.

So my question is...how can I call her to hang out, without first ignoring her, because the less I care the more she tries.

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Call her, "Hey I'm going to check out this really cool place and it's going to be a blast."

Don't invite her yet. After you hang up, call her right back and say, "Oh, I guess you can come too."

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I'd say have agood one to one with her. Screw games, and PUA routines. Your at a point where you both know what you want out of eachother. Sit her down and just talk to her about where you wanna take your guys relationship. Be honest with her, be yourself and reassure her that you will be there for her whatever she decides to do. But first what I would do in your situation(I just happen to be going through somthing similar) Dont let her behavior be detrimental to your happiness. Live life, go out with friends, meet and date new girls. When she see's that you can be happy without her, you will of course naturally be DHV'ing and then you can have your talk when she comes back begging for you.

I'm not convinced that her issues have anything to to with her dads. She's showing a very controling behavior style. It's a very passive/aggressive thing that always puts her in the drivers seat.

Screw that.

I'd show my cards. You can either get this chick under control or just walk. Cause if you can't, she's gonna be too much work. It won't be worth it.

Do things on your terms. She wants this? Give her that. She wants to hangout out Friday? Too bad cause it's gonna be Saturday. She want's sex, fine, come on over. When she comes over,,, whoops, changed my mind.

These types of girls like to be in control, and the great thing about that, is that they will surely lose respect for you when they get it. So you get that shit second class status while her head is gonna be turning for every Alpha male she meets.

Hey Bro,, just a bunch of guess work here!

Good luck with you deal.

Yeah nightriders right, Im not convince either.

Sounds like a controling type for sure.

Mistake you made is to ask her for sex. Never ask. When she wants resist, and when you want it take it.

Walk easy with this one fella. Trouble written all over it, and besides no girl has a genuine excuse for the way they act, so stop making excuses for her.

Shes like every other girl on the planet, a bitch who wants to get FUCKED, the sooner you see that the sooner you change your attitude and stop this bullshit.

It sounds like you like this girl for more than just sex, which is a problem. It's a problem because she sounds like one of those girls that loves the chase and then loses interest when she gets what she wants..

This is advantageous because every once in a while you've got this girl throwing herself at you so you get to have sex. Positive points there. Also you get good social proof with her hanging off you at a club all night. (Wouldn't it be funny to use this to pick up another girl when you're out? haha)

On the other hand it sucks because you sound like you actually like her but since you don't seem to be able to get her past the point of playing games, this isn't the type of girl you want to get seriously involved with but if you can keep an emotional distance, she can be fun.

hope this helps..

+1 Nightrider Girl wants to be in control. She is training you.

It's up to you to decide if you want her to be the alpha or beta in the relationship; neither is a bad choice, depending on what you want. But it seems you want a more flexible dynamic where you both can be alpha and beta. Maybe it's not the right person...

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But any time I show that I care about her, she'll take control of the relationship, ignore my calls and text, and come and go as she pleases.

The second I ignore her, she'll call me non stop, push to hang out with me, when we're together she'll hang all over me, kiss me and try to turn me on.

If I go to a club, she'll make sure she can come over afterwards, and she wants to have sex. If I tell her I'm not in the mood for sex she'll try so hard to get me in the mood.

If I am in the mood and I ask her if she wants to, she comes up with some excuse. Too tired, too cold, feels ugly, etc..

Typical behavior...

But I don't want to seem so uninterested all the time, I want to be honest with her, and if I want to hang out with her, I want to be able to call her and hang out. I hate ignoring her, because I know what it's like to be ignored.

Fight your AFC tendencies, they will only bring you misery. Ask any recovering AFC on this board...

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Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Mistake you made is to ask her for sex. Never ask. When she wants resist, and when you want it take it.

Woah!! What is this shit? Is this what guys like Mystery and DD et al are telling you guys??
If a guy wants to withhold sex from a girl to boost his game that's his call, but guys advising others to not ask and just 'take it' ??that's bad behaviour. Girls aren't just pieces of meat that you take whenever you want. It should always be consensual.

Acer, I don't think he meant it that way. I think he meant to create the environment of where the guy can pretty well dive in and and good things happen for both parties.

But I completely agree with your point and would add, not only should it be 100% concensual for both parties, but it should also be an excellent experience for both parties every time.