Wondering if you'd consider this an IOI



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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 6:17 am 
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this girl in my class who've I've become very friendly with (totally would have asked her out by now, but in convo found out she had a bf).

Anyways, I definitely wouldn't put us in the friendzone, but I'm really getting vibes that shes into me but her bf is in the way. We don't really hang out outside of class (her with a bf, and totally different friend circle and all), but to and after class we're always talking. Anyways, in the couple weeks that we've talked, shes only mentioned her bf in convo twice, and both times introduced him as "the guy I was with that time" or something like that. Definitely feel like thats a good thing. Also, just recently we were talking and she mentioned a paper she has about salsa and I was like ohh salsaa and was like I love to meringue, and was being playful and dancing around a little with her. And she was all like omg do you want to go salsa dancing with me? I can't really see this as a friend thing, because she'd definitely drag her bf right? They've been going out for maybe a month to two at the most, so nothing serious. The only possible explanation other than attraction would be her thinking I'm gay, which I would think is at least better than being in the friend zone. What do you guys think


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 7:32 am 
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hmm she definitely seems interested but have u built up enuff attraction? she could just want a partner to dance with(I mean alot of guys don't know how to dance so she might just need a male) not really sure till theres some actual touching or gesture that;; give us a full idea about her...

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 7:52 am 
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yea there hasn't been much touching yet. Thats why i'm kind of looking forward to the idea of dancing. I got a girl into me one time just by letting loose and dancing with her and being fun. However, that was much more spontaneous, so I don't really know the difference.

I'm really bad at telling the difference between interest and attraction, and creating attraction over interest, and thats been my biggest obstacle I've had to overcome.

Once I know a woman is attracted to me, I am as natural as can be and really don't have any problems. However, attraction has really been sparse and random to me. Let me know what you think... I get lots of eye contact and shes definitely comfortable with me, and in the rare case of really not being close enough to be in the friend zone.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 7:29 pm 
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Thing is, when a girl has been attracted to me, I was never really touchy anyways, I was just fun and hung out with her without acting attracted or w/e. I mean, yea it makes it a bit more random. Thing is, I think I'm a pretty good looking guy. My body is a bit flabby but it doesn't stick out under my clothes, and I got a nice face with full (I used to think to full) lips. I've had girls attracted to me before I even tried, so I count myself lucky for that.

At the same time, I've gotten the "just friends" thing more than once, which is really what confuses me sometimes.

I feel like going dancing has to be more than a friend thing though, because she and I don't hang out outside of class. She has her own group of friends. She could have dragged her bf, or at least some guy friend who shes more comfortable with.

Anyways, we'll see what happens. I'll keep you posted


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:12 pm 
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whats good is that ur going to be dancing so definitely a good moment to escalate kino...and seems ur getting enuff ioi's and all that so thats good...now my suggestion for getting out of that LJBF category is by disqualifying yourself from the female which this will initially spark attraction and her attention

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:40 pm 
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hmmm... whats a good way to disqualify myself. I probably seemed a little eager today when I saw her (not overly so, but just slightly) so I pulled back today. I mean, I don't have a gf right now. One time we were talking and while she was talking to me, one of the hottest girls ever (who's really friendly) passed by and said hi to me and I said hey back. I haven't pursued the hot girl at all, but my target didn't know that and I definitely saw a slight change in her tone after that, like she was qualifying herself. I try not too overanalyze too much.

One idea is to make a fake relationship with a close female friend on facebook or something. I have a really good friend back home whom I'm very close to. (Definitely like a brother sister kind of relationship.) Anyways we put we were in an open relationship over the summer just to mess with people. I could do that again. Let me know if you got any better ideas.

Thanks for all the help btw. Whether I end up getting her or not, I definitely feel my confidence escalating anyways just from talking to so many people in similar types of scenarios and how to deal with these things.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:10 pm 
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IDK I wouldnt really consider it an IOI and to tell you the truth when i read that she had invited you to go salsa dancing with her it could be an IOI and it couldnt be. I also read your later post and having a hot chick or any girl come and say hi to you while shes walking next to you defenitly would make her try to impress you the only thing though is she might try to shit test you so watch out for that. I can tell you from experience, one time I was walking next to this one girl and we were talking and my friend Bri came and said hi to me, this made the girl that I was walking next too look a bit jelouse or something anyways after that I noticed she would do more kino and more shit tests so yeah watch out for shit tests ( By the way I was an AFC while she shit tested me so I dont think I passed them). As for Salsa I think you should go because you can have more kino with her. and because girls like a guy that can dance.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:32 am 
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yea mann thats what it is all about even if u don't get this girl it's a learning experience...ok so to disqualify i would use something shes says to your advantage like for instance if she says: ooOO i like to go shopping so much( something like this or what ever)

you say: ooo see i can tell it would never work out between us we're total opposites , but then again opposites do attract hmmm i'm not too sure about this one

you see how this is a push pull and a disqualifier what i personally like to do is combine tactics like this

and yeah definitely if ur able to have a pivot then by all means do it man...

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 7:57 pm 
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dude the exact same thing happened to me... im from latino america and i was talking to this girl and the topic about dancing came up.. she asked me to go dance with her eventhough she had a bf we went dancing(we joined a ballroom club at school). After a week of dancing i got her attracted to me with a lot of kino from dancing and she broke up with her bf and we dated for about a month and got to finger her :P .. just go for it man..have fun


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 9:16 pm 
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wtf

of course bro

wtf are you even serious

is that a serious question

of course she wants u omg

u have permission to invite her to do anything


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 14, 2008 6:44 am 
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if she asks you again I would pull the cocky funny and say like:

"Well you know, I'm very sexy when I dance so you'll have to keep a close eye on me or the other ladies in the class will try to steal me."

See how she reacts, most likely she laugh it off or be aggressive with you and say something like "i'll be sure to keep a very close eye on you."


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 Post subject: action!
PostPosted: Sat Nov 15, 2008 2:41 am 
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make a move! she has opened the door to an invitation. a boyfriend is of no significance if you run your game. otherwiise she would not be inviting you to dance.

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 15, 2008 12:57 pm 
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judging by your post it's an ioi but you're to afc to make a move.
fuck boyfriend just make a move


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 16, 2008 10:12 pm 
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haha. I am definitely no PUA, but I'm in a much better place than I was a couple months ago. She gives mixed signals a lot. Last time I asked her about it, she seemed completely uninterested, so I tried not to act needy and be too into it. Probably bad though. Should I show more enthusiasm then? I told her that theres a class monday and hopefully we'll go. I'll keep you posted. On the plus side I got 2 numbers this weekend, so 2 new openings haha


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 20, 2008 5:49 pm 
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All u need to do is take this girl dancing. her boyfriend is most likely some boring duesch who never does anything with her, thus why she is looking for someone to have fun with. be that guy. when u go dancing, tear that shit up, women relate dancing to sex. its all about the motion in the ocean. Dance with a few other girls other than just her to demonstrate some alpha qualities. basically i think this girl is looking for an adventure, be the tour guide. If she is just teasing you, then forget about her, that will end her game and put u on top of the situation.

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