Could I get a Critique?



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 Post subject: Could I get a Critique?
PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 2:37 am 
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Ive searched the forums for examples, etc. on this. But could I get some help building my friggin myspace? I get a ton of views, but maybe 1-2 friend requests a day. Ive tried the not serious, funny, w/e profile, Ive tried the Hi my name is, I like this/that, etc. Now its just basic b/c of frustration. lol. My ratio of Views to Requests are like maybe 7-2. Most of the adds I did, by searching and opening on them through msgs, etc. So if some-one doesnt mind looking @ my profile and giving me some suggestions, etc? Thanks.

myspace.com/babyboy41102


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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 3:12 am 
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Use the C&F to myspace profiles...

any doubt , check this out:

http://www.myspace.com/choraumm

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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 3:21 am 
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AOL: toan1990
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listen to this podcast:
http://www.pickuppodcast.com

Ep 33 Dave M Interview

_Saiko

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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 4:06 am 
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Cool page man, choraumm. I did however before changing it tried the c&f way. Had something like:

***WARNING***
Inner-acting with me will result in health problems, some side-effects are including, but not limited to: Randomly Saying "I want you", Sweety Palms, Nervousness, and uncontrollable touching. etc. etc.

My ratio was the same. Tried 2 different c&f versions. still ratio of like 8-2. Maybe girls dont iniate as much. So far out of 81 friends, id say 92% is women, some that wanted my request, others I would msg and end up gettin requested or requesting. Any other ideas? Keep em comming! Thanks again bros.

( Im tryin to get those that visit my page to request me...Get my ratio like 8-5 or so, b/c I know not everyone will request. )

Tryin the DHV Story style...See how it goes.

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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 7:00 pm 
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Ok update. I went with a DHV Story in about me...Still new to this, but im pretty sure its DHV. Its working a little better than the c&f approach I took. I got a few msgs and a comment asking me for more details, like why i was in jail, what happened to my car, etc. So far its ok.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 7:11 pm 
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ive never really used myspace for PU. i do get lots of private comments from girls and stuff so check mine out....

http://www.myspace.com/neilishot


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 7:23 pm 
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Not bad man. Basic with some c&f. Not sure if that works for me tho. Tried just something simple, still just got alot of visitors and no msg/requests. Id say ive tried 5-6 different styles so far.

Im not really using myspace for PU. But what im tryin build my friend list and get a shit ton of comments. Just buildin my profile I guess. Ive had a few requests to meet, but thats not what Im after...

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"Give all your life to one girl, you lose livin life with all girls"

"Life is like a football game, play the right strategy or fumble the ball...Play the game or get played"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 9:23 pm 
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Okay, you people clearly don't know how to work C&F in a Myspace profile lol. I know not everybody's a writer like me, but damn, y'all, I expected a little better around here lol.

Bear witness:

Here

Girls luvvit.


Last edited by Goldeneye on Wed May 14, 2008 10:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 9:45 pm 
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ha, that is nice. mine used to be somewhat like that, funny cocky and random. i dont use myspace for pickups though, i really dont like it at all. the only reason i have one is because my two of my best friends from home who i dont get to see often because i go to college dont have facebook. The general consensus for my age group is that myspace is for creepy 40 yr old stalkers


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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 9:52 pm 
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I never use Myspace for pickups. I tried it once, and it was a dismal failure. I don't like trying to pick girls up online. It almost always comes off as sleazy and, honestly, it just puts me at a tremendous disadvantage. I mean, on one hand I have a big leg up over most other guys because I come across very well in writing, but on the other, most girls aren't gonna have all that much of a reaction to just a picture of me, and also I never really figured out a good way to open online. I'm incredibly charismatic and sharp in person and none of that means anything online, and I don't like attempting to meet a girl when I've been stripped of all the things that really make my game.

I use Myspace to stay conveniently in touch in all of my friends in different states and countries, though AFTER I've started gaming a girl and she knows what I'm about, I'll often friend her on there because when I've established myself in person it's easy to continue the game in writing. My profile is usually private so girls who don't already know me can't even see it...I only temporarily made it visible so I could demonstrate here.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2008 1:37 am 
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Nice, very nice. It is very well written and good use of C&F.

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"Give all your life to one girl, you lose livin life with all girls"

"Life is like a football game, play the right strategy or fumble the ball...Play the game or get played"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2008 1:55 am 
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Myspace is great for practicing flirting and just dicking around but Goldeneye is right. Myspace is not the place to pick up women. You need to stop messing with your Myspace and start getting out more.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2008 2:48 am 
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Yep. Like I said, I *do* think it can be a place to reinforce once you've made the pickup connection (when you get her name or whatever and friend her on 'space later, it certainly doesn't hurt if your whole Myspace is consistent with your pickup persona and you continue the C&F on the page and whatnot), but the game isn't played online, and that's not where women wanna meet guys. Myspace is at BEST a minor supplement.
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Nice, very nice. It is very well written and good use of C&F.
Thank you! I was particularly pleased with the reimagining of Rumpelstiltskin with me as the princess and Flava Flav as the elf lol.


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