ONLINE DATING QUESTION ~ ASK J SMOOTH!!!



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PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 1:43 pm 
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Hi, can I just say this is a great thread. I'm not really into online pickups etc I've always prefered to do the face to face stuff as I'm better a judging reactions etc from that.

Trouble is an ex of mine from my AFC days has got back in touch by email doing the whole "friends thing" and I can't help myself but try and sarge her. Trouble is firstly I'm quite inexperienced in online sarging and secondly I've only ever tired gaming people I don't know.

I've been doing all my usual stuff, Cocky and Funny, Push pull, negs, but it's difficult to tell if what I'm reading as IOI's are real IOI's or if she's just being friendly. I think there's a little resistance in there because of the past - not that we broke up on bad terms, and I don't really know how to break this down. I'm not sure our history helps or hinders my game.

Anyway in a few weeks she's back in town from taking a year out travelling the world and I want her to want to meet up with me. I trust my game from there on but don't know how to ensure it gets to that stage, any help or ideas would be greatly appreciated!


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 5:31 pm 
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Hi, can I just say this is a great thread. I'm not really into online pickups etc I've always prefered to do the face to face stuff as I'm better a judging reactions etc from that.

Trouble is an ex of mine from my AFC days has got back in touch by email doing the whole "friends thing" and I can't help myself but try and sarge her. Trouble is firstly I'm quite inexperienced in online sarging and secondly I've only ever tired gaming people I don't know.

I've been doing all my usual stuff, Cocky and Funny, Push pull, negs, but it's difficult to tell if what I'm reading as IOI's are real IOI's or if she's just being friendly. I think there's a little resistance in there because of the past - not that we broke up on bad terms, and I don't really know how to break this down. I'm not sure our history helps or hinders my game.

Anyway in a few weeks she's back in town from taking a year out travelling the world and I want her to want to meet up with me. I trust my game from there on but don't know how to ensure it gets to that stage, any help or ideas would be greatly appreciated!
Wow, great questions! Thanks for your compliments to the thread as well. Your previous game both helps and hinders you at the same time. She has past experiences with you that have taught her things about you. It's possible for people to change and I'm sure you have. She's going to draw her own conclusions though and the only way to counteract that is not to break frame. Stick with the Cocky Funny, and trying to build attraction. It's obvious you have comfort or she wouldn't still talk to you.

The main thing is getting her in front of you. Until then all you can do is be playful as you would in person trying to build attraction. Make sure to incorporate DHV stories as you usually would do to flip those attraction switches and keep the comfort. Try not to talk to her every day. Make sure she thinks you are busy, and don't give her much explanation. We don't want to come across as needy to her. Other than that, just let the game play out until your 1 on 1.

When you get 1 on 1 then it's on! Revisit attraction phase some and kino escalate and see what happens. If you can advance you're good to go, and don't make a big deal out of it. If you can't advance and she hands you the friends card again, then it's pretty much over.

BEST OF LUCK!!!

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 10:34 am 
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I've totally changed since we split, in those days I was a total needy AFC, but the new found confidence and development of a game has seen the birth of the new me and I wonder if she could handle me :lol:

However I did have a bit of a Cocky and Funny type thing going even back then, not that I knew how to use it properly! And I'm slightly worried that she won't notice the difference online, that's why I've been concentrating on the negs and push pull stuff, in an attempt to express the confidence and that I'm not afraid to stand up to her and keep frame.

I know the comfort is there and there's a playfulness evident between the two of us but I think that's because she feels safe communicating online, as she is able to shield her emotions.

I think she knows if we meet up something will happen and I suspect part of her wants it to and part of her thinks it would be a step backwards, which is why I need to show her I'm different and remove the idea of it being a backwards step fom her head, I'm just not sure if I'm doing it


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 12:50 pm 
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I've totally changed since we split, in those days I was a total needy AFC, but the new found confidence and development of a game has seen the birth of the new me and I wonder if she could handle me :lol:

However I did have a bit of a Cocky and Funny type thing going even back then, not that I knew how to use it properly! And I'm slightly worried that she won't notice the difference online, that's why I've been concentrating on the negs and push pull stuff, in an attempt to express the confidence and that I'm not afraid to stand up to her and keep frame.

I know the comfort is there and there's a playfulness evident between the two of us but I think that's because she feels safe communicating online, as she is able to shield her emotions.

I think she knows if we meet up something will happen and I suspect part of her wants it to and part of her thinks it would be a step backwards, which is why I need to show her I'm different and remove the idea of it being a backwards step fom her head, I'm just not sure if I'm doing it
Okay I see what you are getting at with negs, cocky funny, and the push-pull tactics. Those are things that are different about you and your present game. But it's just as easy to over neg online as it is in person. After a point you go from standing up to her to just being a jerk. So be careful not to over do it.

The best way you can relate that you've changed is through stories with DHV spikes built in them. When you were AFC I'm guessing like most of us you didn't get out much. Express to her that you're going out a lot, on dates, meeting new people, etc. Believe me she's already noticed, women are very intuitive. :wink:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:25 pm 
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Ok thanks for the advice


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:46 pm 
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Ok thanks for the advice
You are welcome!

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:50 pm 
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So today my friends where talking about this perfect hb10 they saw on facebook.

So i decided to look her up and use the poke routine (I forget who's it is), I poke her, she pokes me back, so i message her this -


DevVvo:
Didn't your mother ever tell you not to poke strangers? :)
---
Stella (Perfect HB10) :
hehe nope... she missed that. :)
-----
DevVvo:
Scratch her off the "mother of the year" list...

But i must admit, It was a good poke :) How was it for you?

-----
Stella:
hehe will do.

yeah it was! im glad i did. ;)

------
DevVvo:
Me too... :D

What school do you go to?

-------
Stella:
hehe =D
i go to kings robinhills nu?

-------
DevVvo:
Never hearda that?

King David, yes yes.. i know.

you look like trouble, am i right?

-----------

She hasn't replied yet, but im not quite sure where to take this conversation, how to progress?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 7:17 pm 
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Quote:
So today my friends where talking about this perfect hb10 they saw on facebook.

So i decided to look her up and use the poke routine (I forget who's it is), I poke her, she pokes me back, so i message her this -


DevVvo:
Didn't your mother ever tell you not to poke strangers? :)
---
Stella (Perfect HB10) :
hehe nope... she missed that. :)
-----
DevVvo:
Scratch her off the "mother of the year" list...

But i must admit, It was a good poke :) How was it for you?

-----
Stella:
hehe will do.

yeah it was! im glad i did. ;)

------
DevVvo:
Me too... :D

What school do you go to?

-------
Stella:
hehe =D
i go to kings robinhills nu?

-------
DevVvo:
Never hearda that?

King David, yes yes.. i know.

you look like trouble, am i right?

-----------

She hasn't replied yet, but im not quite sure where to take this conversation, how to progress?
Okay well you did the facebook poke routine well. I can't remember who off the top of my head wrote it either but too bad she didn't catch on. Anyways, you fell back from your frame and routines and went to comfort building with "Where do you go to school?" She answered but you didn't give anything up about yourself which creates a mystery. That can be good at times but not always online. She doesn't know who you are.

I like the "you look like trouble, am I right?" I am guessing if you get a response back it's going to be "Yes, No, or Why do you say that?" So you need to figure out a response to each of those scenarios.

Also, since she hasn't sent anything back yet, if it goes more than a few days with no response you need something catchy to send her to grab her attention again. So I would use something like..."You know how you were says you went to WYZ school right? Well I don't know why but it reminded me of...." then start a DHV story routine.

Otherwise we're going from Opening to Comfort which will put you smack dab in the friends zone. So we have to go back and build some attraction with some DHV stories, subtle negs, and a few false disqualifiers. If you send your second message and she doesn't reply after that then it's over. Hopefully she'll get back in touch and we can go with the plan.

GOOD LUCK!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 03, 2008 7:26 pm 
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Thanks a fuck load man.
That really cleared stuff up.

DevVvo

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 06, 2008 5:02 pm 
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Thanks a f--k load man.
That really cleared stuff up.

DevVvo


Always happy to help! 8)

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 11, 2008 6:42 am 
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Hey J, First off I want to thank you, you gave me some advice awhile back that got a girl back to myplace, i didn't full close but close enough it was my first great succes since joining the community.

ok so my question, I know this girl i guess you could call her my pivot, she has been trying to hook me up with her roommate. She has been doing a great job of talking me up, the girl is pretty interested. The potential girl told my pivot that i should hit her up on myspace. I know all the tricks for myspace and I am getting damn good at the myspace sarge. But in this situation the girl has already seen my profile so i cant go with some opener from the "Myspace Methods," I need something good that shows my prior knowledege of her without sounding too AFC. Or should I just treat it like a regular sarge, and say like "your attractive but do you have any personality"

Thanks


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 11, 2008 12:46 pm 
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Hey J, First off I want to thank you, you gave me some advice awhile back that got a girl back to myplace, i didn't full close but close enough it was my first great succes since joining the community.

ok so my question, I know this girl i guess you could call her my pivot, she has been trying to hook me up with her roommate. She has been doing a great job of talking me up, the girl is pretty interested. The potential girl told my pivot that i should hit her up on myspace. I know all the tricks for myspace and I am getting damn good at the myspace sarge. But in this situation the girl has already seen my profile so i cant go with some opener from the "Myspace Methods," I need something good that shows my prior knowledege of her without sounding too AFC. Or should I just treat it like a regular sarge, and say like "your attractive but do you have any personality"

Thanks
Glad I could help out before, I'm always happy to hear when people have success. You asked a great question. Just because she has some insight into you because of your pivot doesn't mean I'd treat it any differently. You are still the high value man, so if you say something like "you're attractive but do you have any personality?" that would convey the frame of the 10 that you want to have.

Just because she knows a little bit about you doesn't mean that she doesn't still have to work a little bit for your attention. You just want to approach this with the attitude that she's pretty cool, but you aren't sold on her yet. As a matter of fact I've even said that line a few times. :wink:

CHEERS!!!

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 11, 2008 10:56 pm 
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SINCE THIS IS MY THREAD AND THIS WORKSHOP WILL HAVE ONLINE GAME DETAILS, IF YOU ARE INTERESTED LET ME KNOW, OR CLICK THE LINK IN MY SIGNATURE FOR MORE DETAILS!!!

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 16, 2008 9:08 am 
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Let's have a Page 10 party for J Smooth...online lol


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:43 pm 
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Let's have a Page 10 party for J Smooth...online lol
THANKS CHIEF999! I'm all for having a party on Page 10. Let's see if we're having a party the first thing we need is girls. So...

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