So there's this girl that I've known that I've known to for a while, but she was in a LTR until lately. Since then, we've talked a little and she has given me a pretty good amount of IOI's. I have been laying back for the most part and not returned them. I have negged her and socially proofed myself around her a few times.

Anyways, I was playing basketball at our gym the other day and she walked in and we said hey, and then I got back to my game. She was playing bball with some guy on the other court.

After I got back home I sent her a C&F message on myspace like, "for a girl, i was somewhat impressed with your bball skills, haha."

Then she replies, "really? you were watchin me from the other court? pervert haha. i noticed you were rockin it on the courts too. btw, you owe me a rematch in bball when vball starts up (shes on my church vball team)."

My question is how do I respond to that? I was thinking about using a cocky funny response, but I was not expecting that response from her at all.

Are you blind? That's an IOI indicating that she wants you to be looking at her body because she's running around and jumping.

I would say, "Sounds like you were the one oggling me sweetheart, I just thought you had a decent hook shot . I'll tell ya what, I'll give you that rematch, but loser buys the winner dinner ."

That negs her, acknowledges that she was checking you out, and sets up a date for afterward and if you win, then she buys you dinner and feels good about it. If she wins, then you don't DLV for buying her dinner. Also, what you can do is tell her, "Since I'm dinner, you can buy some drinks " Assuming you are old enough, and don't drink lots, just one or two while chatting. Its not about drinking, its just an excuse to keep talking (which she will take if she wants to keep talking and you suggest this near the end of dinner at a restaurant that serves drinks), because typically once dinner is over, you get up and leave.

_________________
"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

We have a winner!!

Great post. One addition.

Do not have the drinks at the resturaunt. Take it to another venue. Something close ("Around the corner")

It will provide Kino and phase shift opportunities

_________________
Recommended reading list.

Double Your Dating by DD
(This will work on your inner game)

http://www.freewebs.com/xfman/
(This will work on your outer game)

Wow! That's an IOI? I guess I am blind. Good thing I asked you guys cause I would have responded to that completely differently. I guess I'm worse at recognizing IOI's than I thought.

Hopefully you get better! SCOTTIE DOESN'T KNOW, SCOTTIE DOESN'T KNOW, SO DON'T TELL SCOTTIE, CUZZ SCOTTIE DOESN'T KNOW! HAHA Sorry Scottie you need to learn to take a hint man!

Moving to the bar at a restaurant is like bouncing, but you don't have to make any sort of trip, so you don't have to justify it, its much more casual, because you are already there.

If you have her hooked to you, then yeah, you want to suggest heading to the pub down the block. If you don't have her hooked yet, because you're still just in the initial stages, then you want to just suggest she buys a round of drinks at the bar, where you have greater ability to angle your body away from her a bit, and talk to her slightly over your shoulder (not lots, because you are already in a conversation with her and that's weird) and draw her in more through good conversation that you can't really carry on that well during dinner. Now that you've gotten her enthralled, you can either bounce to the place down the street, or arrange to meet in a couple days, because you give her a FTC like having to do homework (make sure you make it sound valid and not sound like an AFC).

Just don't invite her back to your place, because that's too quick and AFC. If she suggests going to her place, or your place, then you can either neg her and then agree, or neg her for moving to fast, and then tell her another time, so that she wants it that much more then.

_________________
"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Update:

I responded "Sounds like you we're the one gazing, I just thought you had a decent jumpshot. We're definitely gonna have a rematch."

She replied. "By decent jumpshot you mean, FREAKIN SWEET JUMPSHOT, don't you?"

I said, "I'd describe it as a decently awesome jumpshot personally."

Her: "Well, I'll brush up on my moves so that I can rock you next time."

----
Ok. I know I probably should ask her out to have a rematch, but I didn't want to do it over Myspace. Anyways, I'm seeing her in our small group meeting in 2 hours, any suggestions for what I should say? Oh, and here's a kicker, shes been hanging out with this guy that also a part of the group. We've known each other for a while, but me and him aren't exactly close or anything. Should I avoid asking her to a rematch in front of him?

Dammit Rye Lee ... I am throughly impressed with the way you weave that shit together. Props.

_________________
"Responsibility for our lives is something we never lose but which we often deny... You can blame whomever you wish, but you’re the one who must experience (or endure) the results." -Steve Pavlina (http://www.stevepavlina.com)

i wouldnt worry about the other guy at this point as she pretty clearly indicated she is interested in u, but u should deffenetly use the other line about the loser pays for dinner... thats money right there, about the guy if anythin just befriend him
good luck

There are very specific reasons to bounce about when dating.

Do you know why Rye? As it pertains to MM and many other techniques?

_________________
Recommended reading list.

Double Your Dating by DD
(This will work on your inner game)

http://www.freewebs.com/xfman/
(This will work on your outer game)

Dude, if you get nothing else out of this, realize this . . . IT'S ON.

Hopefully your class with her went well.

Yes, I know the concept behind bouncing. As I said, the reason why I suggested moving to the restaurant bar is because during dinner you may not get enough talking going on (I know a lot of people that hardly talk at all during dinner) and so she doesn't get thoroughly hooked to the point where you can bounce to another completely different location. By moving up to the restaurant bar, then it is still a change of location, just as valid as moving from inside a bar, to the patio (which is considered a bounce) and its so close that she's not gonna refuse unless she just won't drink. Read my last post, its all laid out there plainly. Please stop treating me like a noob without reading my posts.

_________________
"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Well, she is a virgin, so I dunno how much of it is ON. lol. But I like her and would ideally like to try and get involved in a LTR. The problem is, her friend keeps hitting on me and is taking more initiative. She's cute, but not my target. I know I need to isolate, but it seems like her friend is getting in the way of letting us do that.

I still feel like we need to build rapport though. Could I ask her out on this date without first building rapport? But I can also do it at our small group meeting after it is over... Should I build rapport first or ask her for a rematch first?

The way she's talking, according to what you are reporting, her being a vrigin has very little to do with this. At the very least she likes you very much. She may not jump into bed with you tonight, but if handled correctly, she would be ready soon. If you want a LTR with her, it sounds like at this point there should be no problem with that.

Obviously her friend is attracted to you too, by what you say anyway. It's not a real problem honestly. It just takes alpha characteristics on your part. If nothing else, have them both hang out with you for a bit, so you can talk to your target more directly.

With my wife, her friend was VERY forward with me about the time my wife and I started liking each other. Her friend actually wanted me to fuck her before I ever got that far with my wife. I did do certain things with this friend, and believe it or not, today the three of us are great friends. In fact, she was with us at a time in our lives when only the CLOSEST people to us were what we needed, and she was there. For both of us.

Yes, you can ask her on a date w/o first building rapport. Build the rapport on the date. Don't wait until your small group meeting.

Go ahead and ask for the rematch too. Use that time to also build rapport.