So I just met this girl about a month ago and she's pretty cool and pretty cute. But all of our interaction has been at school (I'm in college) and in a studying type of context. I try and be funny and push it as much as I can but it always seems weird since its during the day and at school. I'm not sure if she likes me but I think I've gotten some IOIs. I want to see if I can be more than just friends with her, which it seems like thats all we are right now.

But this seems like a more broad problem I am having. I have no problem making friends with girls and talking to them etc... Cause I definitely want to increase the size of my social circle, especially girls. But i find it hard to like sexually escalate at college during the day. What kind of things can I do to move forward with this girl, AND in general to avoid the dreaded friend zone.

thanks

I've always found that the best way to avoid friend-zone is to always be in a position of non-scarcity. The more "coals on the fire" the better. Acting fearlessly and confidently seems to stem directly from having options.

If this girl is in your class, you could consider inviting her out for a study date. Many PUAs seem to like the idea of ambiguity of intentions. I'm one of them. I would probably say to her "hey, I'm going to starbucks to go grab a tea and do some algebra, wanna come? " She may interpret this as something in the friend-zone, but no biggie. Once you have her outside of school is when you really get your game on.

Read up on KINO escalation. Make sure there's plenty of push-pull.

Some ambiguity of intentions is good. You want her to never be quite sure of whether you want to be friends or more until her attraction becomes very obvious. Look out for IOIs. Once you know she's interested in more, go in for a kiss-close.

Ok thanks, I like this advice. Well I am eating lunch with her this week and most likely will probably go out and party with her in the next few weekends. What specifically can I do or say and how can I tell if shes into it. Other than the starbucks thing, cause I have done that and it hasn't really gone anywhere. And I'm not very experienced with this stuff so Im not too sure on how to calibrate the kino, especially during the day

Personally I like Juggler's standpoint on KINO. Use it as a reward. She tells you something funny, touch her. She says something ridiculous, swat her with a napkin. Personally, I like to make bets that lead to kino escalation if I like a girl: Example, the 5 lies game, but the winner gets a neck-rub from the loser. You can throw the game on purpose if you're good at massages.

If things are generally progressing nicely at a restaurant, I usually like to invite my date to my side of the booth (if I'm sitting in a booth), where I might try to jockey for positioning and complain about how she's a seat hog, then wrap my arm around her when she says something I like.

There's no real way to tell you what to do specifically, but generally, you'll want to make sure that you're making headway with her. If the starbucks thing went nowhere, you might want to tell her that you think she's adorable, but again, do it within the context of her doing something that you like.

Be bold and be fearless. Remember there's always other women out there and that non-psychotic women will appreciate a man who is decicive and not afraid to speak what's on his mind.

As far as ways to tell if she's interested, use your library to pick up a book on body language. The biggest tells are if she is fondling her cutlery, jewlery or hair, exposing her neck and wrists and biting her lip. If you're not very adept at body language, be careful, because similar motions can be a result of anger, boredom or bad shrimp!

I'm trying to get a handle on NLP at the moment. So far it seems to be pretty successful. Determining whether a person is visual for example can allow you to use suggestive language to help to paint a picture which can move things along in a short period of time.


anyhow hopefully this helps. Best of luck!