I am just wondering if anyone might happen to know as to what would make a girl end a relationship with you and then start to follow you one day while you are heading to firearm safety training.

I am just curious because this has been bothering me for a long time and I believe that it is one of my sticking points that is preventing me from truly being successfull. I have tried to study this relationship for a long time so that I can learn from it and so that I can improve my game, but so far without much luck.

Understanding this relationship is important to me and as to what happened with it as I know that I did some things right before I met this girl, but I also did some things wrong as well and I am pretty damn sure that it is because of my stupidity and lack of knowledge of the game as well as my lack of self confidence and my overall lack of social status at the time that caused me to lose this girl.

After she ended the relationship with me and after she followed me that one day I once asked her if she wanted to get back together and she said no. Because of that and because of what I have been learning I have gotten into things like sales and marketing and because of what Ross tends to talk about relating to BF destroyers I once considered the idea of going up to Colorado where she is currently living with her husband and picking her up.

I know that she is married now and for the most part I have just tried to understand the relationship as I figured that it would help me with my game. During the process that has gotten me to look at myself very deeply and to ask myself as to what I could have done wrong and as to what I might have done right during that relationship so that I knew as to where I was making mistakes at and as to where I could improve.

Because of what Major Mark said about married women I have often wondered as to whether or not this girl was really happy in her current marriage and as to whether or not her decision to marry the guy that she is with now had anything to do with me and the relationship that I had with her.

I've been looking at because I am trying to balance out the nice guy in me with the jerk so that I can be the Alpha Male while at the same time maintaining my morals and values that I was taught as a kid.

I don't know if it is true or not, but I have heard that some of the best pick up artists in the world are those guys that basically grew up without a father and because of that I have been trying to work on myself so that the lack of my father's presence does not effect me at all, but I have noticed that a lot of people are questioning my character and integrity and are tending to think that I am a thief and a liar which I am not.

Because of what Matador and Mystery have said and because of this relationship I have also been attempting to get back into the martial arts while at the same time trying to make some real honest and trustworthy friends so that I could create that social status that Mystery and Matador tend to talk about and because of what Mystery said about wealth and my own financial status I have attempted to start my own businesses but due to some romance scams that I came across I am having some legal issues with Paypa as one of my ideas to get myself out of debt was to sell on eBay.

Well, from teh looks of things, it seems that you are too needy. That is what I get out of this post. Plus you have a MAJOR case of oneitis. Yes, you may "try" to get other girls, but you aren't trying because you like them, you are trying because you are telling yourself "I dont have oneitis" and since you do, you are setting yourself up for failure.
Now I'm not saying that its wrong to settle for one girl and live out the rest of your life happy. Quite the opposite in fact. I got into this community to help people achieve that.
On to the fact that this woman you want is married. This is VERY soft ground, the ONLY way that you would ACTUALLY be able to get this girl, is based on a few things:
A. You two have been in VERY good contact ever since she moved.
B. She has expressed to you that she wants you more then her husband.
C. She has expressed to you the fact that she is unhappy in her current situation.
D. That she has no problem breaking her husband's heart.

I know this by experience, married chicks fuck with your head the most. Especially if you both want each other. If none of the things have happened in the above list, then you have VERY little chance for success. Especially if you have already gone out with this girl.

Now, just because this relationship went wrong, doesn't mean that you have anything left to learn from it. You have seen what you did, you recognize the fact that you were "AFC" and that you didn't have enough game to be able to keep the relationship. What this translates to in the rest of the world, separate from the pickup community, is that you didn't stand up for yourself. You let her walk over you, you did things ALWAYS for her, and never for you. You didn't communicate your feelings that you were being mistreated. . . and so on.

Now on to balancing the "nice guy" and the "jerk." I want to put this a different way, lets say that you are finding the exact person that you want to be. You are figuring out that you KNOW what you want to do, and you do it. Simple as that. Nothing has to get in your way, and nothing has to be given up, unless you WANT to. This is why some people call people a "jerk" or "nice guy." The "jerk" part of you is the part that does what he wants, despite the fact that others dont want him to. The "nice" guy is the part of you that does what he wants, and others DO want him to do it. Its just a matter of perception. Some people will want you to do things, that others DONT want you to do. One thing is always constant though; it is EXACTLY what YOU want to do.

As for making friends. It is NOT hard to make friends, it is VERY hard to get GOOD friends that you can trust. I'm not a very trusting individual, and THAT is one of my character flaws. But the people I DO trust, end up being VERY good friends with me, and we tend to be friends for a VERY long time. To me, its all about trust and dependability.

Basically my entire life style is based around a VERY simple way of thinking and doing.

Do the things you WANT to do, and DONT do the things that you DONT want to do.

any questions,
feel free to post.

_________________
"Everyone's got a little captn in 'em"

Why are you still going for the same girl that broke up with you years ago? Aren't there enough OTHER women in the world for you to practice your new skills with? Sure, it's a fun thought to think about banging an ex (especially if she is married to some other dude) but seriously...Move on!

Guaranteed there is some better chick out there, but you're too busy thinking about some married woman miles and miles away from you...

Just my thoughts on the subject...

PS...married women really ARE easier as Major Mark alluded to...why not go find some other married woman!?

If I can ever get my computer to stop acting up then you will get the full story here.

I started studying this first with the intention of picking her up because of what Ross, Mystery, and Major Mark said, but since then I have just been trying to learn from it and so that I can bett understand as to how the BF destroyer really works and as to how to actually apply it as it all need to come out looking and sounding unrehearsed and second nature.

I suspect that many of her reasons for marrying the guy that she married were based upon the relationship that I had with her and that she is currently in marriage that she really is not happy in, but just cannot figure out as to how to get out of it.

Because of what Ross, Mystery, Major Mark and because of things that I have studied like psychology and NLP as well as what I know about her and about male/female relationships I suspect that she is still thinking of and dreaming of me on a subconcious level.

I've been studying it in an attempt to improve my overall game as I am pretty sure that the reason she ended the relationship with me was because I fucked up and did not listen to her or really pay attention to her in an Alpha Male sort of way.

Also because of what Ross, Mystery, and Major Mark said as well as my own individual studies I have learned to pay attention to patterns and has made me much more observant.