Hi Guys,

I got a challenge some of you here might be able to help me with.

Ive broken with my ex a few weeks back, and I can see the standard lack of attraction issues coming up and waning over the past few months. (more likely than not due to my lack of focus on the relationship. ie too much time with her and wussy characteristics etc due to "getting lazy and complacent")

Anyway, I would like to get this attraction back again. Weve been together 4 yrs, and up until a few months back we were fine.

Details aside.

Here the challange:

1) See is "seeing someone else" and heading away to see him interstate or with him interstate
2) She still wants to see me all the time, but she is trying to squeeze me into the friend box.
3) She has been head over heels for me for 4 yrs, but started getting frustrated when I havent been ready to marry her just yet.
4) She still finds me physically attractive BUT i dont think she "feels it" the same was as before now as her attention is on the "new guy".

*She leaves to see this guy in a week

NOW

How do 're attract" her again enough to "kill the buzz" for the other guy before its too late? (with in a short period of time as she is also looking to leave the state now too very soon)

Other points:

a) she still asks whether i really want her to go, AND even said she wouldnt go if I didnt want her too
b) She still finds every reason she can to come see me BUT doesnt want to "have sex with me" cause "she gets attached to me again and she has given up on us being together".


Thoughts on how to reestablish the attraction ASAP before I a) she leaves to be with this other guy b) she leaves the state in a few weeks?

If we could go a bit deeper than a simple:

" Move on you have "oneitis"

" See her less" ( which i agree with BUT we have a short time frame here

Thanks for your help guys,

You said it right at the beginning: she wants to leave you because you won't marry her.

You meet EVERY criteria of a guy she wants. She is trying to control you by not giving you any sex until you commit to marriage, which, IMO is fucking ridiculous. She's even pressuring you by giving you a time constraint to make a decision to marry her before you "lose her" to another guy.

I know its hard man, but if you, personally, are not ready for marriage, then it won't happen. She obviously wants a guy to commit (socially and lawfully) to taking care of her and any future children.

Like I said, if you aren't ready for it, let it go. This isn't about game at this point, its about big time life changing decisions. And if she can't respect that you want to wait a little while longer, then chuck her.

_________________