Ok, so theres this girl I met in a Barnes and nobles book store, I'm gonna brake down my routine so you can see where I can go from there.

So I was sitting down, in the book store reading the mystery method, the book was open and placed in front of me, when walked right past me, a girl who I saw at a bar and met briefly once, but probably didn't remember who I was.
I was sitting down and see was walking right past me, I used an opener I made up on the spot, which was, "can you tell me what kids are reading these days", because I talked to her a little once and all I knew about her was she worked in the children's book section of the store.
She said, "let me smoke a cigrrette and and I'll be right back to talk to you".
So she came back and walked with me around the store, showing me various childrens books, I talked to her about the books I've read, she talked to me about the books shes read, I told her about this short story I read by Neil Gaiman, and she went and got the book and we read it together.
Then I mentoined that I had seen her at a bar before, she told me she was there 4 times a week, and I asked her if I can buy her a drink if she sees me there, now when I asked her a question like this, the boyfriend objection did not come up,
so it end on the note that, "maybe I'll see you at the bar"
but I have yet to see her at that bar, so the only option I really have is to go back in her store and ask her for coffee or something, but it would look really needy if I went into her store of the intention of asking her out.
I need some other reason to be in there, like one guy at my work, who's become kind of my none mobile wing man, suggested that he wrote a certian book down on a peice of papper and I go in there and ask her to look for it for me.

For me my problem mainly is, that women, all my life, have put me in a state of emotional parallelization, I lock up and don't know what to say, or how to act or what to do next, and when your in that state, thats when a women thinks your a creep, a girl never says, "hey that guy over there is lonely maybe I'll go talk to him" That goes against her survival instincts, never does a girl think, "oh maybe that guy who creeps me out is a nice guy inside",
NO
in their world theres no time for that.

Oh boy, oh boy. You should get to work on understanding and internalizing inner game and the theory of PUArtistry.

First off, never offer to buy a woman a drink. Especially in this case "If I see you at the bar will you let me buy you a drink?" No, don't do that. You are acting quite AFC and demonstrating low value to her by doing this.

It seems like you have some self confidence and self esteem issues though that are holding you back. You won't be able to be more confident with approaching women by reading or posting in forums. You are going to have to force yourself to go out in the field and socialize. One way or another, you are going to have to internalize that you are not only worthy to talk to and be in the presence of beautiful women, but that you are the prize and they are lucky to be in your presence. You should look in to NLP techniques and I'm sure other vets at this forum can give you some great advice to better your inner game.

what about having her buy you a drink to demonstrate value?

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It's better to act and repent, than to not act and regret - Nicolo Machiavelli