Hey, how exactly would I go about a response to an AMOG who's finally finished his pitty insults, and has just apologized to me after realizing that he crossed the line?

I figured it would be a form of qualification, and he now sees himself as beta. However, what type of response will show that I don't get too emotional but still shows I'm a human being instead of an arrogant prick?

"Wann get a drink?"

Act as if he is now ur best mate. He did what you wanted, reward him. Have a good time!

Agreed.... ...damit everytime I read your posts I start planning a road trip south haha!

Relax, he's no longer a threat to you, say something like "don't worry dude, you've apologised, we're cool" (enforces the idea that you are in control, but you're forgiving, and not going to act like a dick)

Show that your cool, don't look riled. But don't be unaffected by his apology. Accept the apology and move on.

Life's to short to bear grudges!

Happy sarging.

Be polite and get continual light compliance e.g. 'yeah your ok buddy. Hey, wouldn't mind getting us a drink man? thanks dude' 'could you hold this for me for a sec? thanks dude

etc. etc. Light compliance, not heavy coz THATS being an a**hole.

I don't know where you come from, but if I stepped the line then apologised, I consider it even, thats the whole premis of apologising. Their is no way I would buy him a drink and formally apologise infront of the group.

It's too much of a flip going from alpha male of group, to the new guys bitch. Some guys would take it, many would flip, and their goes that calm dominance you had.

His apology is his "surender" I can't see any reason to push it.

Arg, i guess i am gonna have to break this down more
But before i get started, if fin starts stalking me because of this there is gonna be words had!!

Understand that the whole idea of being alpha and a leader is essensally a balence between submission and leading.
An appology is a submissive behavior which, if u imagine social status as a ladder, improves your leadership (alpha). You didnt do anything, u stayed still, his appology moved him (who was above you) down below you. This automatically makes you closer to the top of the ladder.

This is GOOD behavior. He did what u wanted. Now you must REWARD him but still maintain your dominece. First, u have taken his appology on. This is the start of your reply "Thanks". Then you want to allow it, move on from it so to speak, our reply is now "Thanks. Well, lets put this behind us" You have taken his appology on, but also shown you have accepted it. Now the last part, REWARD. This is possibly the most important part. Its renforcing the good work. This could be going for a drink, do not buy it for him or anything because the reward is your attention.

Final reply "Thanks. Well, lets put this behind us now *smile*. Lets get some beers this evening"

Madals
p.s. Fin, if u appear outside my window i will inform my other stalkers, they are very protective

Well an apology can be an effective way to show a specefic type of alpha characteristic or dominance.

Everyone remembers the "trouble kid" from school who refused to apologise to anyone. It was a lack of self esteem that meant he viewed the world in terms of "apologise and you lose".

An apology is a sign of sub-mission, it can demonstrate that you are unafraid to confront your faults, it shows that you can keep your ego in check.

Most of all IT SHOWS BRAVERY!

Do you know the balls you have to have in order to apologise infront of a group of people you have just met, and then continue the conversation like nothing happened

This doesn't have much to do with the subject, but it's important.

Apologising and having the guts to realise you will fall down occasionally; and then have to stand up again, is all part of being Alpha.

P.S
Madals, My stalkers are determined, I'm certain they will travel down following me in disguise, if you foolishly reject my alliance.... ...it'll be my stalkers vs yours in a pitched battle. Kinda like the opening scene from "gangs of new york".

Mine have red hot hair straightners and curling irons. And Giant statues of my as battering rams!! THIS IS SPATA!!

Anyways fin, although i see what your saying that an appology can be alpha it all depends how you appologise and how you act after that. I consider an apology in 99% of cases to level the playing field, it has to be immediatly balenced to make one of you dominant. Who that is all depends.

Madals

1. My stalkers have dancing poles converted into spears and are well trained needing only 1 friend to help them squeeze into size 2 jeans!!!

2. Agreed, it's like willingness to emote, too much = wimp, too little = insecure asshole.

"It's all good bud! No worries!" *pat on the back/shoulder with a big grin*

Shows you don't take stuff too seriously and that your feelings are hard to hurt, which makes later attempts to insult you useless to him, so he pretty much will stop all together. The pat on the shoulder/back will increase your dominance over him if he is insecure at all, if not, then you'll be more accepted as an equal and just a buddy-buddy kind of thing, again with the taking things easy. Remember, the pat isn't condescending, it's just a friendly pat and it's all up to him how he interprets it based upon how he views himself.

_________________
"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

now you're gaming men, that sux so much

why dont you take advantage in the open window he made and go for the kiss?

"hey buddy, im sorry for the other day, are we cool?"
*grabs by the hip* "knock it off, pal" kclose


ps: he apologising just mean he respects you, in no way you are now promoted to the dominant man in the group because of it, and if you dont act just as respectful, he can very probably break your teeth, AND WITH REASON!

Care to back that with psychological reasoning?

An apology in front of the group, often demotes you. It's accepting your wrong and showing submissiveness to the person our apologising too. It's possible to gain the frame back, but apologising is saying "I'm wrong can you forgive me".

We learn male psycholopgy as well in order to learn how to deal with AMOG's we need to learn to affect them as well as women.

"You need to engage the group not just the target", haven't you ever heard this?

It is feasible to continue not accepting his apology but it wouldn't be the "cool" thing to do. If he has over stepped the line and the group has recognised this, things are NOT even until you say so.

Act like you're not bothered about it, be the bigger person and command him to get you a drink.

"It's all good bro, I'll have a beer though."

well, the guy who apologises may as well be seen as high value too, but then it comes to consistence, Im afraid you guys sometimes focus on small pictures, if you really are a grown up man youll have no problem asking or accepting apoligies, if anyone sees you apologising there's nothing bad in it, and when youre grown up you wouldnt brother if people perceive this or not, cause someday or with other actions of maturity of yours they'll notice how big is your moral fiber and start admiring you(which is much better than thinking youre cool for 10s)

thats how real men do, if you wanna try to be a smartass, gangsta or punk go for it, try to get the guy to buy you drink(oh, and dont forget backfire...if someone acted this way with me I wouldnt need to say a word and would lower their value 5x) some ladies may dig it, but do you dig these ones? if you do, then do it

1. I agree apologies make things even, no need to ask for favours afterwards.
2. Like I said it depends when you apologise too much wimp too little ass-hole.
3. A formal apology is a public declaration that you were wrong and it puts you in a submissive position. It doesn't matter if "thats what adults do" it's still a subissive stance to take. That's why it can be a really alpha thing to do.
But none the less you formally apologiseing for everything, can make you look very beta. One of the major traits for beta males is apologising when it really isn't necessary.
4. Do you honestly think the members here are too insecure to apologise? Where does this, "don't apologise it makes you weak" theory that we all have, stem from. Becuase your post seems to imply that we have made such a statement.