Hi guys,

I was at a friend's birthday dinner two weeks ago. We were all seated at a very long table since we had a group of 20. I was sitting in the middle.

One of birthday boy's friends brought his gf along. I did not know this friend. The couple was sitting at one end of this very long table. The gf was kinda cute and I saw that she was giving me a few IOI's throughout the dinner.

However, being the rAFC that I am, I did not know how to pursue this. Pursue this meaning not just an introduction and chitchat. But to #close that girl as well.

Can you guys help me with this in case a situation like this happens again?

Thanks

I'm always a bit weary of encroaching on someone's GF. I'm always thinking "if that was me, would I like my GF being hit on?"

Two ways to react really - he could be flattered that his GF is that good, or be pretty jealous - and land one on you at worst!

This would obviously result in the way she responds to you...

a) She gives you the brush off and he's flattered she has the attention and deflects it.

b) She responds and he get's jealous and possibly punches you!

Either way, it's a lose lose situation!

However, I digress.....

Should you wish to engage her, you need to either:

a) Talk to her at the table - this will make the scene more open and less threatening to the BF as you are talking to her in an area he can moderate your conversation. This may not be the best place to do this, so...

b) Make your excuses to leave the table, let people know where you are going but make absolutely sure that you are looking mostly at her when you do this, so she is absolutey in no doubt (or at least you are giving a very strong hint) why you are leaving the table. If you have succeeded in your eye contact, she will also leave the table (probably a few minutes after you so as not to create suspicion)

Example: You say at the table "If you will excuse me, I'm going to get some air for a while." Make sure as you say this, you look around the table, making a brief pause at the girl and making eye contact for at least 1 whole second (any more would cause some uncomfortable suspicion)

Because you have told everyone (her in particular) where you will be, she will join you, probably not engaging you because although you have given a strong hint, she may feel that you have mislead her, so promptly engage her by saying "what took you so long then?" The rest should be poetry in motion!!

If the BF finds you talking, make sure you have a fallback plan - find some kind of common ground (ie hobby, etc) so if he says "what are you two talking about?" You can explain the common interest and diffuse the situation..!

Good luck my friend!

Later,

"G"

Thanks a lot mrieus.

I'll be sure to remember those pointers and put it to the test in the event something like that happens.

Has anything like this happened to any of you guys before?