Absolutely destroyed any confidence I had.



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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:30 am 
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Alright the story of my weekend.(including wat i did wrong n wat i did ok)
p.s. my first weekend out sargin since learning bout the community n reading MM. so it wasn't gonna be my normal way of talking to ppl, it was gonna be the mm way.

Fri nite:
me and my cousin are at bar/pool hall. smiling as we walk in and in a happy mood.

It was just me and him playin pool n laughing, didn't invite any of our friends out coz we couldnt be bothered. we were gonna go home after afew drinks.

Next table to us theres a group of 8 guys and 1 HB9.
They all take turns trying to ask her something, buy her drink,so on n so on.She smiles happily n blows them off.

me n my cousin are thinking wow, they are all over her n she isn't biting back, is she alone or she really wit them n 1 of them is her bf.(she was bored as hell tho)

So we keep playin n laughin and we notice she keeps looking at us.
So my cousin said, come on man it's too much of a waste if you don't talk to her. She's clearly not interested in those guys.

Afew minutes later she's kino'n with some guy. My cousin n I guess its her bf or sum1 she picked out of all those 8guys. He gets her to stand up n play pool wit him.


Then my friends came unexpectedly along with my ex and her girlfriends.
So all of a sudden the party of 2 becomes the party of like 12.
All of a sudden that hb9 must be thinking wow these 2 arn't losers after all.

So anywayz she sits back down, n i opened her up with the "hey did u see that fight outside"

she gets interested n goes "was that wat those ppl 5mins ago were cheerin about"
then i give her the jealous girlfriend thing.
and it was really sucking her in, it seems she was genuinely interested n wasn't brushing me off.

Major mistakes tho.
1. i had to keep leaving that seat next to her to hit my shot at pool then sit back down.
2. i asked her who the guys she was wit (showed too much interest maybe/trying to find out if she had a bf)
3. i was leaning in so she could hear me, instead of her leaning in to me.
4. i was talking to loud i pretty much was spitting on her.
5. i kept stopping the convo instead of 1 continuing convo(i was nervous as hell, especially since my x was there watching it, so i couldnt think to even give my pool cue to sum1 so i dont have to play)

so at the end she leaves wit that guy she was kino'n wit.
I was pretty annoyed since i probably had the longest conversation wit her out of all the guys that nite.


anyways the nite was pretty fun. coz my x n her girlfriends were pretty fun to be wit so we just went out clubbing.


Now onto sat nite: (e.g. confidence destroyer) each time the hottest in the group which i ignored is the one that tells me off.

me n my cousin again wit 2 friends of ours.
my friend frigging staring down all the chicks in the place.
but i decide to walk towards this 6set.
they all look at me funny even tho i was smiling.
i open wit "did u guys see that fight"
"we don't really care..."
after bout 15secs they blow me off wit the "we're having a private conversation here can you please leave"

so i goto a 5set after about 10mins
tried the my friend over there n his gf are fighting we need a female opinion.
hottest in the group yells behind my back with"she doesn't want to talk to you"

ok so im guessing my approach sucks even tho im casual and smiling.
I also think that those questions are shit openers to a serious looking group.
and the one major mistake i think i did was to open a 5/6set on my first nite out sarging.
I think i should have stuck to a 2set first.
what do you guys think i can do to prepare myself next time.

cheers.
p.s. that nite ended up being shit, we went club hopping n had to line up each time for about 40mins. we met some nz chicks while lining up. who were pretty hot but the guards wouldnt let us in coz we just met them that nite.
but i got some kino wit a hb8 "lets hold hands n remember our names otherwise the guards won't let us in" she played along just fine lol.
the guards asked us for our age tho n we couldnt answer LOL.

also met some randoms in the terrace(smoking area) coz they were taking a photo n i smiled in the background n they laughed bout it n thought it was cute n wanted to dance wit me. otherwise it was a shit nite.


Last edited by _Sponge_ on Sun Jun 22, 2008 6:13 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:56 am 
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Ok, First off you need to look at the positives and work on the stuff that needs a little more work. You seem to not have any AA which is a major accomplishment. Some Men never even get over that.

Next, your Openers are really weak and overused. Personally, I like to go in with a situational opener. Try to make your own opener up and tell it to NO ONE!!! So when you approach they are unlikely to have heard it before.

Also, I think since u are relatively new to the game You should stick to 2-4 sets anything more is a crowd. Also if a girl does something rude or negative when you first arrive, you need to neg her immediatelty after opening. The Girl that says or does something 1st is often the Alpha Female and your success with the group depends on her liking you. It may also be a test to see if you can stick up for yourself.

Overall, you seem outgoing and if u keep refining your game it will all work out!!!


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 6:10 am 
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thanks for the pointers man.

does this mean i should come up with a neg for the alpha female before i even go up to the group or if i can't just make up one as i'm talking to the rest of the group.


now i need help with this.
as i said i got blown off.
when someone goes "we're having a private conversation"
or" she doesn't want to talk to you" obviously this is the end. but how can you leave with our guns blazing instead of just saying "ok have a good nite guys"


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:59 am 
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From what I read, I dont think you used a false time constraint, using that helps so much as it says to them this guy is not going to hang around. Also your body language, in the 6 set you say some girl yelled something from behind your back? How did she get behind your back?

I tried a test with the false time constraint and just watched the body language of the girls of a 3 set. If you look carefully you can see one of them getting annoyed. One girl last night, turned her body towards the her group and her facial expression was like "when is he going to leave".

But apart from that man, you done awsome. As Smarts said no signs of AA which does affect some men real hard.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 3:20 pm 
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You may have got some bad responses mate but as the other guys have said, you are approaching without fear and pretty big groups too. You should take a lot of positives out of that!

I suppose they were very common openers you used but for your first time out sarging I'd say you should be proud of your approaches, regardless of the reaction you got.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 3:47 pm 
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Quote:
thanks for the pointers man.

does this mean i should come up with a neg for the alpha female before i even go up to the group or if i can't just make up one as i'm talking to the rest of the group.


now i need help with this.
as i said i got blown off.
when someone goes "we're having a private conversation"
or" she doesn't want to talk to you" obviously this is the end. but how can you leave with our guns blazing instead of just saying "ok have a good nite guys"
Try the make it off the top of the head so it goes smoothly with what your talking about. After the one girl said something behind your back you should have been like "Man, is she always this rude. How do you all stand her?" Make sure you say this playfully and with a smile.

That comment is quite popular, but for good reason. It makes the women view you as an Alpha Male, who will not be walked over. Also more importantly it teaches them that if they call you out or do something that Lowers your value (or whatever) they are going to get called out for it. Basically, It makes them less likely to do stuff like that again.

As far as the other 2 comments. It already seems they shut you down, but that can't stop you from trying can it? You have nothing to lose at that point. A lot of times (although not all) 5th grade answers will make them laugh.

Heres what you could have said:
"we're having a private conversation"
"GREAT!!! I love private conversations... Who is this one about."

" she doesn't want to talk to you"
"I don't want to talk to her either... (something, something)"

Hope this helps

Smarts


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:44 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Heres what you could have said:
"we're having a private conversation"
"GREAT!!! I love private conversations... Who is this one about."

" she doesn't want to talk to you"
"I don't want to talk to her either... (something, something)"

Hope this helps

Smarts
haha I love the responses here :)

Keep up the super work "Sponge" and you will get there with success.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:20 pm 
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hehe...drop the fight thing unless there really was one cuz im sure i've seen that on TV somewhere...


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:34 pm 
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your material is old, read MM's book and develope your own openers and read more books on different methods of pick up.

and for your confidence problem
my-game-has-changed-im-sharing-vt23775.html

_________________
I'm addicted to facing my fears.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:46 pm 
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i always glance over smile at who ever the hot chick is then go back to what i was doing kind of ignoreing her most of the time theyll come up and find out why i didnt approch them to which i will say what makes you so special that i would approch you or some variation of that lol then carry on the conversation from there if they dont come up to me no love lost there on to the next one


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 9:37 am 
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Quote:
From what I read, I dont think you used a false time constraint, using that helps so much as it says to them this guy is not going to hang around. Also your body language, in the 6 set you say some girl yelled something from behind your back? How did she get behind your back?
Yerp, I totally forgot about false time constraint. Will make sure I add it in next time.

The alpha/hb yelled from behind me because it was 2 tables pushed together, I was standing between the 2 tables. So 2girls(incl. alpha) were on 1 table and 3 were on another and i was talking to the 3 girls.
I thought this mite pay off as i won't have to face the hb. backfired as she went apeshit behind my back lol.



Quote:
Heres what you could have said:
"we're having a private conversation"
"GREAT!!! I love private conversations... Who is this one about."

" she doesn't want to talk to you"
"I don't want to talk to her either... (something, something)"
Love these lol. i should have had them ready before i went over.
next saturday i'll have them ready incase i get ambushed haha.



Quote:
i always glance over smile at who ever the hot chick is then go back to what i was doing kind of ignoreing her most of the time theyll come up and find out why i didnt approch them to which i will say what makes you so special that i would approch you or some variation of that lol then carry on the conversation from there if they dont come up to me no love lost there on to the next one
I find this one is more of a hit and miss back in high school parties. Most of the time they will probably wish you just came up to them and start talking(female pride). At actual clubs/bars this one is even harder since the chicks wouldn't even have a clue who you are. atleast in highschool they would have seen you around.

Thanks for all the replies guys.

I'll update again at the end of this weekend comin and tell you how i went lol.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 11:58 am 
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" she doesn't want to talk to you"
"I don't want to talk to her either... (something, something)"

How about....

Reaction 1: Follow up with "It's you I've been waiting to talk to" - dumbfounded (because she thinks it's her friend you wanted to talk to) you then:

a) Continue conversation
b) Neg her by saying "but hey, if you don't wanna talk, then that's fine..." walk off and see if she follows.

Reaction 2: If she says "I don't wanna talk to you either" then say "That's fine - talking's overrated - how about I get you another of those (pointing to her drink) and you can just listen then?"


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 12:49 pm 
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lol those are awesome mrieus


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 1:27 pm 
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TX sponge :wink:

I do what I can!


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:07 am 
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alright guys, heres the story for this weekend.
key things:
be confident and smile alot!!,
don't give a shit if a chick looks like she's not interested,
don't give a shit about other guys around her, instead grab her with confidence and make her feel like your the man in a bunch of boys
and have fun of course.

ok so went out last nite wit my cousin again n some female friends of ours to this club our friend's gf was havin bday at.

Pretty eventful and funny.

First we get there and just dance for a bit with our friends, then I lie down on the couches and me and a mate pass out LOL. security wakes us up. So i start dancing with the rest of our group so I dont get sleepy.(this is a vip area for the bday)

Then i grab my cousin n tell him to come to the main d-floor.
Our chick friends were leaving so we had to do it without a pivot on the d-floor, gonna b hard.

We see this 4set of hb8's n 9's. We start dancing on the side of them n then get in their circle. They were sorta cool, they didn't blow us off or move away n just kept dancing wit us.(had this happened last week, i woulda been blown off i reckon since i woulda felt awkward)

Then i see a hb9 with afew guys around her so i get eye contact first, then i ditch the 4set n go to her n smile n start dancing with her(cutting off the guys in the process). we start gridin, then i tell her come outside n get some air wit my cousin n i. she follows.

soon as we get outside tho, all these guys are talking to her n being typical amog. so instead of fighting off a crowd, we just left her. went back to d-floor.
this time a 3set, a hb8,hb4(if thats even a hb LOL) n a guy who looked gayish. we dance wit the hb4 for ages n ignore the hb8 n the guy.
the hb8 was norwegian n was a shit dancer n she kept getting caught looking at me, so my cousin told me to dance wit her.
So i start dancing wit her n after awhile i do the whole twirl thing wit her and i think i could have kissed her in the moment but she was turning me off wit her shit awkward dancing so i was like laughing in the inside lol.


Then I see that hb9 again with afew guys.
So i ditch my cousin n the 3set n i grab the hb9's arm n turn her around to me n i smile, she smiles too.
So we start dancing, grinding (like as if these guys wern't even there lol).

I then twirl her n have my arm around her as she faces me again. Then push her out n twirl here again and this time i kiss her and i must say, it was the best feeling in the world, grabbing a chick in front of a bunch of guys n kissing her. p.s. she had the best/softest lips i've ever kissed. it was pretty passionate too.
then i stop n push her away n smile n she goes "your so bad bad bad" with a cheeky smile.(im not sure wat this meant yet...) n we seperate.

my cousin then comes up to me said im an idiot coz it was just me n him left at the club, all our friends had left.
I'm like so?
He goes "well that chick has a bf n that was his mates around her, probs guarding her,I think her bf is wanabe gangsta, fark man we're gonna be in a fight watch out"

we got lucky tho coz her bf started a fight on the side of the dancefloor just as i finished dancing wit her ended up getting kicked out for starting a fight lol. so she had to leave.


oh and another thing.
any1 here from australia?
rhianon from "so you think you can dance" was there,
she comes into the d-floor n was just standing there looking lost so i tell her start dancing, n shes like "nah im not in the mood" n im like why ur meant to be good!! so i point to sum1 n go "go outdance that guy then" she tells me her n her bf are fighting. so i told her d-floor is only for dancers, so get lost lol. so she leaves haha.
i realised normally i'd b too scared to go up to sum1 sorta hot let alone sum1 sorta famous but ya i was just in a confident mood all night.

Alright any comments or advices how i should isolate that 4set at the start of the nite would be good(they were hard enough to get into let alone isolate tho) and also i realised i was an idiot for not getting that hb9's number since i already kissed her newayz.

i felt really confident and happy energy last nite, so im gonna try bring that with me next week again lol.

kk hope u enjoyed the read


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