I went out on a first date about 2 weeks ago with a woman who I met on okcupid. The date went really well; we had amazing chemistry and we made out a couple of times by the end of the date. She really likes me and she’s very affectionate (and possibly clingy). For example, the day after the date, she texted me “would I sound needy if I said I missed your face already?”. She went on vacation to another country for about a week soon after the date and she texted me almost every day. One of her texts on vacation was “wanted to text you that I haven’t thought about you at all”.
She recently came back from vacation and I scheduled a dinner date for this Saturday. She was very enthusiastic and one of her texts was “meeting up with you feels like it’s forever from now”.
Later, we had the following text exchange:
Her: what are we eating Saturday?
Me: there’s this good Italian restaurant in [city I live in] called [name of restaurant]
Her: so does that mean I’m coming down to you?
Me: indeed
Her: why?
Me: hahahahahaha
Her: haha that was sorta a silly question but I had to ask
Me: I thought it was a segue into a joke. Is there some place in particular you wanted to meet up?
Me: (can’t tell whether you’re being serious)
Her: I just got home and was talking to my parents. That wasn’t a joke. Just wasn’t sure why you picked [city I live in]
Her: it better be good!
Her: now I know why you say I sound kinda mean haha
Me: haha, so how about I come pick you up so you don’t have to worry about driving?
Her: haha, we could do that. or I drive to your place if your place has parking
Her: I just don’t like asking unless someone offers
Me: I live in the suburbs so there’s lots of street parking and there’s a parking lot as well. We can figure it out later though. You’re probably tired as hell right now- go get some sleep! I don’t want to keep you up
Her: Nah, I’m ok. It’s ok if you don’t want to talk 
[we text for about an hour afterwards]
She lives a 15 minute drive away and she has a car, and the first date was walking distance from her place, so I think I’m being totally reasonable by having the second date close to where I live. I’m worried that she’s high maintenance because of this text, but also because she drives a BMW and owns a couple of watches that cost a few thousand dollars each, and she also spends a lot of money on clothes (she says that she likes “nice” things). Even though she makes much more money than me and likes expensive things, I don’t think money is the issue here because she knows I drive a very affordable car and she knows I wear a cheap digital watch. I’m worried that this is the tip of the iceberg and she’ll just get more demanding over time. I really like her though and we have amazing chemistry, so I don’t want to stop seeing her.
What are your thoughts on the situation? Does she seem high maintenance or is any of this a red flag? Why did she get an attitude about driving to where I live?
I really don’t want to pick her up and since she brought up driving to my place and then I drive us to the restaurant, that’s what I’d prefer to do (as a middle ground). I also don’t want her to think she can boss me around and make me pamper her. Did she offer to drive to my place just to be nice and she was really implying that she wants me to pick her up? Or do you think she’d be okay with me telling her that she should meet me at my place? How should I tell her that she should meet me at my place and when should I let her know? Do you think it would have negative consequences?
How should I act in the future so that she doesn’t think she can take advantage of me?
CHAT