Hey all,

Wanted some advice. So I've been working at my job for a little over a year now. I've made a couple of good friends and one who I hangout with regularly. He knows I'm single and he's been vouching for me to hookup with this girl at my job who is also single. The girl and I flirt once in a while but I feel theirs a lot of social pressure which is what I told him. He says who cares, and to have fun with her. Ask her out and try to get her out on a weekend.

I've asked her to lunch one or twice but she's always busy. I think once she does come out to lunch with me I can then go in for the kill. My problem is that I think a lot of people will know what's going on.

All thoughts and advice would be helpful.

Ya idk I think that could make things awkward and basically the ball is in her court and high chance she will say no as no one is in the mood usually to be asked out at work...

Maybe get her number instead..and go for a night out shortly afterwards, not a lunch date lol.

So being interested in someone is still taboo even past the age of 13?
And you're inviting her to lunch of all places?

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What do you suggest?

I suggest flirting with her since this is a person you see on a daily basis. Get a connection going. And then ask her out on a proper date. That means no dinner, unless it's at your place. No movie, unless it's at your place. No day time dates.

Night. Drinks. Bowling. Whatever.

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How to keep a girl.

Who gives a shit, it's your life, not theirs.

The sooner you stop caring the sooner life gets easier.

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If you're worried about the social pressure, and other people knowing, you don't stand a chance. The guys that overly concern themselves with the opinions of others tend not to do too well in anything in life, not just with woman. A man thats going to get the girl is not considering what others are going to think; thats for the guy who lacks belief and confidence.

However, the popular cliche " Don't miss business with pleasure" didn't become a popular cliche by accident. Its a popular phrase for a reason. Theres lots of truth in it. Especially if you consider getting serious. And even more so if you've yet to develop yourself as someone who has choice with women. Its more easier for a guy who already has success with women to navigate in this kind of situation than a guy who asks these types of question.

Have you even went for her number yet?

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No I haven't went for her number yet. But I've been flirting with her a bit. Today was a bit extreme. I saw her and kneeled on one knee and placed her hand in mine as If I were about to propose. I said f*&k it and just looked into her eyes. She then handed me a ruler and said I accept and walked away. It was a bit out of nowhere and many people were watching. But I think she may have known I was messing with her. I then saw her again later in the day and was talking regularly as if what happened earlier didn't happen. I still didn't ask for her number yet though. I'm trying to figure out how I can get her out. When I ask how her weekends are she always says she is working so idk.

Update:

I got here number. Here's how it went...

I was away for a couple of weeks on vacation and went to work today for an event that we were running. When I first saw her she had a gazing smile on her face and her eyes were lit up. It was kinda funny. Anyway I said hey how are you, its nice to see you. Idk if she knew I was away or not but whatever. We were chatting for a bit and then I said I have to head out because I had to be somewhere. I then went to my office to pack my bag.

She was already upstairs and heard me fiddling around so she called my name. I shouted yes!!! Who is calling me. She said to come here. I went to where she was sitting which is another office she shares with a few people away from mine. She was giving me information on something I asked her to check out for me. However, no one was upstairs just us. So I thought it was the perfect opportunity to chop it up for a bit and try to build a connection before asking.

We chatted for a bit and I asked her how she was doing as I haven't been at work for two weeks. She said fine just working non stop. I said oh ewwww j/k that's good, where do you work?

She told me about her job and I was making some funny jokes about it because she works as a credit card analyst for a bank. (The ones who can increase your credit line, help you with consolidation) and all that other BS.

I then said so when do you have free time for yourself. She said Friday's Saturday mornings and Sunday evening. I said oh ok that's not so bad for someone who works two jobs.

She said yea but I work over night at the other back to back and it burns me out. "I live a boring life."

Me: Boring! Like how boring, what do you do for fun?

Her: Sleep, do my nails and shop at the mall once an a while.

Me: Yea that does sound boring... Haha J/k

Me: Let's hangout! I can show you a good time

Her: Where? what do you want to do? I'm boring.

Me: Yea, forget it. From what you told me you do seem pretty boring, just loose my number. (hahah joking, I'm such a jerk)

Her: Smile, laugh...

Me: Take my number down, we'll get together. I'll show you a good time and un-bore you.

Her: She writes it down.

Me: What's your phone number, I will give you a call and arrange something for a Friday or Saturday... Oh wait, Saturdays I'm pretty tied up but Friday would be a good day.

Her: Ok, well here is my number

Me: Nice, I'll be in touch... maybe I'll see you tomorrow then.

Her: bye

Me: See you, enjoy the day.

So that's that. Not sure how I handled it. I was almost not going to ask her but I figured why not, who gives a crap if we work together. I enjoyed gazing into her eyes and smiling while she was talking. I actually got turned on by it and I think she did to because I can just see it in her eyes. Anyway, was thinking of giving her a buzz next week as this week and weekend I can't meet up with her as I'll be tied up plus I'm going out with friends. It's a week layover but I work with her and see her once in a while so I don't think it's a big deal. All thoughts, suggestions and help appreciated.

Read my guide.

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My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Nice write up man! Haven't read the other post yet but I did the first one. So I guess where I went wrong was saying tame my number down. I said this because she made a comment about not having her phone with her but I did initially ask for hers and got it. Secondly is the follow up section... you wrote 1 day 14hrs. That's doable but we work for the same company. I think hello good morning would be good enough for our initial interaction before I schedule something with here. But please let me know if that's wrong. I was gonna reach out to her via text or call in a week I was think so we can go out next Friday. Is that to long. My week is tied up with work and this weekend I'm going out with friends.

Nice update man, and nice save on that phone number lol, would have been lame if you just handed her your phone number, but you did well and got hers to secure it.

Recently had a similar situation, she asked for my phone number first, she wrote it down, but I was like okay now you give me your phone number so I know who is calling, and she did.. Good stuff.

She seems quite open to you. So as long as you dont come off as creepy in your text and not overthink things like when or what to say, she will find away to make time for you. Just not text her friday hoping she wont be busy that night.

You probably read it wrong. I didn't say wait 1 day and 14 hrs.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Thanks man I appreciate your help but the one word answers and sentences don't really provide me with enough depth. Can you elaborate more here so that perhaps others who may have a similar experience can also use the help. Would appreciate your knowledge base.

Jesus christ.

Lunch/coffee dates are for platonic friends. You take girls you want to have sex with out on night dates.

Haha, are you going to take her back to your office in front of everyone?
Who gives a shit? Go for what you want in a respectful way and don't worry about the rest.

Since she has declined the lunch dates twice, I'd wait a month, hit the gym in the meantime, and ask her out for a drink at a bar. Stop talking about her with co-workers, too. That shit gets back to her.

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