I get uncomfortable being around women



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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2016 3:54 am 
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Hello all!

I want to ask some advice from you guys on how to ease myself on this problem about being nervous and uncomfortable around women.

Sometimes, the feeling arises not just when I'm around women I find attractive, but basically any girl at all around my age level.

I also get nervous when I glance at a woman, because I get so self-conscious. I get afraid or nervous that they will think I like them or something. And if they think I do, then in my slightly irrational, nervous mind and heart, I become "in their favor" and they will have the leeway to control me because they think that I am drawn to them or something.

They will be thinking "Oh this guy likes me. That means I can play around and control him. He's just like all those other guys. Hahaha. I'm so going to give him a difficult time," or something.

I know it's illogical, but I have developed that feeling.

Would there be any things you could suggest that could assist me in getting over this?

Thanks!

Best regards,
Lonious


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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2016 6:04 am 
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How do you learn to swim? You get in the fucking pool. Be around more women.


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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2016 6:42 pm 
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Eh all I can say is start small. You have confidence issues. We need to build up your confidence! Are there any activities where you feel relaxed......at ease or cool ? Eventually you will have to jump into the pool like the other poster said. Training wheels can't take you all the way.

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PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2016 6:47 pm 
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Force yourself to engage people, even small micro behaviors like asking if somebody at a table is using a chair. Fake it till you become it, even if you feel super uneasy, what's the worse that can happen vomit on their shoe? At least you'd have a funny story to tell us;)


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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 2:53 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:28 pm
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Quote:
Hello all!

I want to ask some advice from you guys on how to ease myself on this problem about being nervous and uncomfortable around women.

Sometimes, the feeling arises not just when I'm around women I find attractive, but basically any girl at all around my age level.

I also get nervous when I glance at a woman, because I get so self-conscious. I get afraid or nervous that they will think I like them or something. And if they think I do, then in my slightly irrational, nervous mind and heart, I become "in their favor" and they will have the leeway to control me because they think that I am drawn to them or something.

They will be thinking "Oh this guy likes me. That means I can play around and control him. He's just like all those other guys. Hahaha. I'm so going to give him a difficult time," or something.

I know it's illogical, but I have developed that feeling.

Would there be any things you could suggest that could assist me in getting over this?

Thanks!

Best regards,
Lonious
To answer your question and find a solution first you have to get to the bottom of the issue. Why are you nervous? From what i read, its all in your head

You need to work on your inner game and get rid of that beta mentality. So what if girls think you like them
Im a huge flirt. So as long as a girl even makes my dick move, im flirting. I dont give a shit if she tells everyone i like her. Why? Becausw im an alpha male who has his shit together. And its in my nature to be attracted to women. So whatever girl i interact with and flirt with has a small window to keep that attention and allow me to game her. If not its her lost not mine

You need to adapt a similar mindset because right now your giving women more value than you arw giving yourself.


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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 7:05 pm 
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I totally hear where you are coming from. Don't think you're the only one who has felt this way. Most guys believe it or not start out right where you are. But you don't have to be that way. You can change!

David DiAngelo did a lot of research about biolocial and social reasons for why this is which I find interesting. Not everyone agrees with him but it does serve as a basis to maybe explain why guys feel that way around girls.

There is some good advice above which I agree with. Fake it till you make it is a good technique. Do you have sisters? Are you uncomfortable around them? If you have sisters and are OK with hanging out with them, then just practicing acting how you would with them but just with other girls. I used this in the past and its a great tool for getting past those nervous feelings. And actually for me its a key part of my game now! It also prevents that concern you have about them manipulating you.

One other quick tip is have something rehursed and memorized that you can talk about. An interesting or funny story is a good idea but it can be whatever. If you're sitting around and there's a girl nearby just start into it like you're telling it to your sister. It seems really strange at first but trust me it works way better than just sitting in silence!

I'd also recommend the newbie challenge posted above. Spend a few hours in a public place just saying hello to every girl you can. It helps to lessen the social anxiety of meeting new people.

Try those few things then report back on how you do. Remember small steps ... Crawl till you can walk then soon you'll be running then leading the pack!


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PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2016 8:31 pm 
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A lot of men have a fear of women which I don't think I could ever fully understand. Male lions do not fear lionesses, Bulls do not fear cows, nor do roosters fear hens. So what is it with the human male in this generation that has developed this fear of the female human as if she has any power to do him any physical harm or danger? I find it ridiculous to say the lease.

My first advice to you would be to stop masturbating and watching pornography. Do some research on semen retention. A lot of men experience higher levels of self confidence, reduced anxiety, and courage after retaining their life creating fluid within their body. Just give it a shot for 90 days and I can assure you that your anxiety will decrease dramatically. Its the fluid that makes you the male creature you are suppose to be. A woman should never make you afraid. You have to come to grips with who and what you are.

All you're saying in this post is " I'm weak and a follower. Somebody please help me".

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PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2016 9:59 am 
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Quote:
Hello all!

I want to ask some advice from you guys on how to ease myself on this problem about being nervous and uncomfortable around women.

Sometimes, the feeling arises not just when I'm around women I find attractive, but basically any girl at all around my age level.

I also get nervous when I glance at a woman, because I get so self-conscious. I get afraid or nervous that they will think I like them or something. And if they think I do, then in my slightly irrational, nervous mind and heart, I become "in their favor" and they will have the leeway to control me because they think that I am drawn to them or something.

They will be thinking "Oh this guy likes me. That means I can play around and control him. He's just like all those other guys. Hahaha. I'm so going to give him a difficult time," or something.

I know it's illogical, but I have developed that feeling.

Would there be any things you could suggest that could assist me in getting over this?

Thanks!

Best regards,
Lonious
Since your perception has nothing to do with the reality it will fade out with time by itself. And you have already approached the changing point. The more you observe women’s behavior the better idea you will get.

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PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2016 3:46 pm 
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Quote:
I get afraid or nervous that they will think I like them or something. And if they think I do, then in my slightly irrational, nervous mind and heart, I become "in their favor" and they will have the leeway to control me because they think that I am drawn to them or something.

They will be thinking "Oh this guy likes me. That means I can play around and control him. He's just like all those other guys. Hahaha. I'm so going to give him a difficult time," or something.
Sounds like you've been reading Redpill stuff. Cut it out. Most of them are bitter, and have no success with women.

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Build trust and comfort by holding their hands and covertly rubbing your elbows on their nipples.
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