Hey guys, I'm new to this so hopefully this is the correct place to post my "issue", I really need your help!
It's a long story, but it probably helps to explain the current context.
I've known a girl for over a year now (ex co-worker) and we've become best friends (yes, we friendzoned each other
) chatting almost every day.
She gives me tips on how to pick up girls and I give her tips on how to pick up guys. The thing is, she's pretty shy and has anxiety to talk to other people in real life, so she uses Tinder to get a date. There was an older guy (she’s mid twenty, he’s really forty) and after weeks of chatting, they were finally meeting up. She didn’t want to, because she googled him and she was not attracted to him at all.
Anyway, they meet. He was an hour late and I was a little pissed off he kept her waiting. She was obviously not happy about it either and the first thing she did as soon she laid eyes on him was text me that she wanted to go home. She also wanted to meet with me afterwards, but hours later still no response. I was getting worried, especially when she said she didn’t like him at all, but still felt like kissing. Why would she spend so much time with him if she didn't like him?
Then it hit me like a rock: I was jealous! Was it real? Or was it typical alpha male behavior not wanting to see a girl I know kiss some douche who showed up nearly an hour late? I didn’t know:
fact 1 that made me a very confused man.
Luckily, she did not ending up kissing him, I went to pick her up to get dinner together, but it was already late and I asked her if I should take her home. She said no… She wanted to meet up at my place and have some beers and chill out, so we did. Some way or the other, I was holding her hands in the car and caressed her hand, she caressed me back!
Fact 2 that really confused me!
At home, she insinuated that I should kiss her, but she wanted me to kiss her by surprise. Next to the confusion I already because I was getting jealous and maybe I like this girl more than I knew, I obviously was also confused since she announced she wanted me to surprise kiss her.
I tried to kiss her, but she turned her head =
fact 3 that confused me. “You practically announced it, I saw it coming a mile away”. I wanted to try again, even when I drove her home and she insinuated that she still wants that kiss once again, but I didn’t have the balls to do it, I didn’t want to be rejected twice and to take advantage of this girl who wanted to fall in love but just had a lousy date.
Next weekend we meet up at her please. We had dinner together and again she said she still wanted that kiss. My brain couldn’t comprehend that she would talk about it so much instead of just making out with me!
So I kissed her and after the kiss, we both knew it wasn’t passionate at all. We talked about it (of course) and she said we shouldn’t be a couple, since she wants all or nothing (‘all’ meaning being a couple and ‘nothing’ meaning not even being friends). I believe the kiss felt weird because it's been built up too much, all that talking *sigh*.
That was confusing to me, it didn’t seem like a logical choice you had to make: we could have tried and see if it worked out or not…
Anyway, next weekend, we meet up again. We went to the park to chill out and pick nick and then had some wine at my place. This time, I decided NOT to talk about kisses or being a couple, I just wanted to have fun. We started playing around, tickling each other. Next thing I knew I was caressing her hair, her breast, I was kissing her and she didn’t look away, she kissed me back! I was taking of her bra and kissing her breasts. Then she made me stop and said she wanted to smoke. She but her bra and shirt back on and we went for a smoke. Afterwards, it was very awkward. The only word we could say was “awkward” and then awkwardly laugh about it.
Fact 4 that really REALLY confused me!
We’ve been chatting like passed Sunday didn’t even happen. I asked her to come over to my place so we can cook together (she really wants to learn how to cook), but she said “I’ll let you know”.
And that’s where I stand…
What the hell guys, can you please help me out? I think she’s really afraid of losing me and that’s why she didn’t want to make out. Maybe I should take it more slowly, let her get used to the idea of being with me?
It’s such a tricky situation being best friends for over a year and then making out, but I need your advice guys!
PS: sorry for the long thread, but I believe all the info is important...
CHAT
