TL;DR version: Met girl, was indecisive about her, she went from making sure I showed up and initiating hugs to not inviting me and kinda avoiding me, plus she showed up with some guy and invited only couples. So did I wait too long? Should I give up, keep waiting, or text her and just ask her out directly?

Long Version:

A while back (January-ish) I met this girl, basically part of my group of friends, party bus, multiple bar kind of situation.

I was instantly attracted but didn't really game her much, as I thought she had a boyfriend. Saw her going home with a friend of mine, freaked out and texted him asking what was up. He was just getting a ride home but he let it slip to a couple of our other friends the next day.

So since then they've been doing a decent job of getting us together, and I suspect one of them may have mentioned I liked her. Basically every time she'd show up she'd make sure to greet me with some kind of physical contact, hug, arm around my back, just giving me a little elbow shove from behind...

Now the problem on my end is, busy, was kinda seeing someone else, and perhaps more importantly, worried that I don't have anything in common with her. So I kinda decided to back off and see if things developed slowly/naturally. Eventually she was going to be laid up for three weeks after a surgery, and at that point she made sure to get my number from a friend so she could invite me and of course I went.

Now, a couple weeks ago she was back in play from surgery finally and our group was making plans for a "local" holiday. The girl was also texting me aside from the others to make sure we were going to where she was.... so cool.

I get there, sideways hug (essentially her arm around my back, my arm around her shoulders) which she held for a bit before breaking away. Here's where I think I screwed up, we're standing around and I wanted to check out inside the building so I said to everyone "hey let's go inside." Not sure if she didn't hear me or just didn't want to, but basically only one of my friends went inside with me. Thing is, the inside bar had better beer and it was really tough fighting through the crowd so we kinda stayed inside for a while.

When we got back out, she handed me her pussy willow and said "hold my pussy." (part of the local holiday, chicks are supposed to hit guys they like with it, which reminds me she hit me with it before the hug.) Now this is where I should have said something clever, but my brain didn't come up with a good reply for like a week. So anyway, a few minutes later she's looking talking about how she loves crowd watching. We talk about it for a sec, and she ends up telling me she's "only attracted to dickbags" and that she's "trying to figure out what level of dickbag that guy is."

Later our group was moving, and last I saw her she was talking to some guy (not sure if it was the same dickbag.) I had run into the other girl I was kinda seeing, so ended up talking to her and dancing for a bit.

So now it's the next weekend, and my friend (basically my wingman) and I decide to go to this other little "festival." We're walking down the path and I see her waving us over. It was so unexpected I didn't even recognize her at first... which is a big change from Monday, when she was texting me to show up. She's there with some muscular, dickbag looking guy she introduces me to. No hug or anything that she's normally given, although she did offer me a sip of some alcohol she'd snuck in. Basically she told us to follow on a tour they were starting, but my wing and I got bored and wandered off. At this point we ran into like our entire group of friends, as she had invited one of the guys and he invited everyone else except me and my wingman for some reason. Which, as I think about it, means all the couples.

Once we were all back together she didn't really talk to me at all, and I was trying to read her body language but it seemed inconclusive to me although my wing said there was some flirting.


So basically, have I just waited too long and should move on? Or should I just text her and see if she wants to see a movie or something, just the two of us? Or continue waiting and just see what happens?



Only other thing I'd add to give you a better picture of her, she's kind of a tomboy I think, lots of male friends and she's in the military.

There is usually a moment that comes across in your mind when you think "I should make out with her." This is your body telling you the time is right. Girls give us a window of opportunity to do this... if we don't take it; we're done.
Hate to say it, but she put you in the friend zone right here telling you she's basically into someone else (that guy).

My advice, work on your outer game; push/pull type stuff. It will help you create massive amounts of attraction. Like the next time you hug that girl again, or someone else you know, just say "I love your hugs... now get the fuck off me"; this is push/pull because you basically say you love xxx then you hate xxx. Look for more examples online. Also work on just saying and doing what's on your mind; you're inner game: Give girls a change to experience the real you. What I mean by that is (and bear with me): It's like when you step on a lego in the middle of the night. Some people just don't say anything, but they are saying "Aw f*ck" in their heads. Other people however just say "Aw f*ck" out loud because they have their thoughts words and actions aligned. You want to be like that!! The sooner that you do not care, the sooner you will rid yourself from that "I am needy" mentality and be more alpha lol. Another example is if someone spills a drink on you. You could think in your head "god fucking damn it" and not say anything, or just tell him; whats on your mind; "god fucking damn it watch where you are going you autistic faggot" etc. Hope this helps!

_________________
---Red's Journal
Motivation Mindset="If I can do it, it can be done"
No Fap Mindset="If I fap, I will turn into a god damn retard"

This was definitely not such a moment. It was more jokey/flirty, and a good reply could have helped build/rebuild some sexual tension I think. But no, this was not a time to kiss her as she basically handed the pussy willow to me because her hands were full and she was trying to do something.
Not surprising I guess. I was hoping maybe it was an attempt to make me jealous or something...
Unfortunately the "real me" was just confused and uncertain. I didn't have any urges I didn't follow, I was stuck in my head the whole night trying to work out what I was doing... and the other girl I liked showing up just made me more uncertain trying to decide how I should act if they each saw me with the other girl. I spend far too much of my life confused and uncertain... :/


But at least it sounds like there's hope I can turn this around if I keep working at sexual tension, so that's good. I need a lot of work on my inner game too. (In case you couldn't tell