Hi Guys!
This is going to be a long story, but I really need your input/advice on this, because I am clearly not thinking straight. And you probably know what would be the best option.

So I met (E) a girl 2 years ago and instantly we were on the same wavelength. She moved into my apartment (we are both students), to get away from her ex (a chick). So we could talk for 10 hours straight without noticing, we were the same on many levels. She even made hints about us getting together, how perfect a guy and a partner I could be etc. Then one night she jumped on me and we were together. Things seemed great, but she had to move away. Then I confessed my feelings for her and for a while she said that yeah we should totally be together. But a week later out of the blue she said that since she is still feels for her ex we should pause this until she recovers and we should stay friends.

This was 1.5 years ago. So basically we said we would wait for each other. And every now and then she said she loved me and we should be together, we planned stuff together, but later she always said that the timing is not right, the circumstances aren't right for this right now.

So basically we were in a friendship status, but we were very close and we weren't together probably because of distance and because she didn't have much time because of work.

Around April/ June she gradually became more distant. We used to talk every day for 1.5 years, but now it became less frequent.

3 weeks ago she came down to my apartment because she couldn't study at home. One day while she way away I checked her messages, because I suspected something. What I've found out was that she was in love with one of her collagues. A woman (M) 10 years her senior, who has a kid and a partner(also a chick). So M cheated on her partner with E. M broke up with her partner and wrecked the poor chick and got together with E. But M then broke up with E to get back together with her partner again.

Then as she left my apartment I told E again that I love her. She said she loves me too. Then I asked her what is going on with her and this woman. She lied and said that nothing is going on, and that I am seeing things that aren't there, and I should drop this subject because she is honest with me.

Then M made horrible things to E. So eventually E deleted M from facebook. But yesterday they became friends again. But M had previously played with E, broke her, made gossips about her on her workplace, cheated on her etc...

So for like 2 weeks E barely talks to me and says that she wants to be alone and doesn't want to talk to anyone. But still yesterday she and M became friends again on facebook.

I love E very much. And I would like to resolve this situation and get back together with her. But since I am emotionally too involved and screwed up right now I have no clue what I should do. I always stood by E's side. Helped her when no one was helping her, cared about her. She hadn't been with a lot of guys, I was pretty much the first one she would get together with. And previously she said that she is tired of dating girls.

So what do you guys think about this whole story? What should I do to turn this thing around, and get back together with E?

I wrote an article on that you will probably find useful. Its called " Take Control Of Your Emotion" its on the home page of the website in my signature. Go give it a look.

Whats happening here is that you are mistaking your feelings for some divine truth. Just because you feel in love with a " Lying home wrecking cheater " doesn't mean that you are suppose to be with them. Where is your self worth? And what kind of guy with any self esteem chasing down a woman with this kind of behavior?

Whats in it for you?

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Wow. Well it was a great article. I enjoyed that indian yogi's opinion on fear. I agree, that sometimes emotions are totally illogical and one should not hold on to them. Unfortunately I am not so good at letting go. Especially not like this. And I always find some reason to stay hopeful that things will turn out fine in this situation.

Oneitis. As crap as this sounds, spin more plates and you won't care if you drop one. I've only quickly scanned through the story, but I did read the 2 comments after it... sounds like you're mistaking neediness for love. I'm doing it too, with my ex. I know how hard it is to let go. But trust me, it gets easier. If you have to chase a girl, shes not interested. The only way to get that interest back, is to walk away and never look back. "The strongest negotiating position, is to be able to walk away and mean it" either she'll come back, or you'll get somebody better. So yea, let go, it's a win-win in the long run, I promise you that.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Thanks for sharing your story here's my take on what I think what is going on, take it with a grain of salt however my advice is only based on my own and friends past experiences. This isn't so much me telling you what you should do this is more of an insight to help you explore your options. What has worked for me and my friends might not necessarily work for you.

With that being said, it sounds like she is toying with you. While this isn't a usual situation I am familiar with ( the whole bi sexual part), I feel like this is a classic case of being the rebound guy. The best advice I can give is keep yourself busy, join a club, find a hobby, find a job or pick more hours up at work. Just keep your mind off her. Ignore her calls and texts, more importantly keep away from Facebook. Facebook is only gonna make things worse. In addition, talk to more girls. There are plenty of girls that you can connect with just the same, it doesn't seem like it but they are out there. Easier said then done, I know but its not impossible.

If you stick with this advice you'll either forget about her and nothing more will happen or your lack of attention will make her come crawling back to you. As far as I'm concerned you seem like an awesome dude so I feel you shouldn't take her back but that decision is up to you.

Best wishes.

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"Veni, vidi, vici"-I came, I saw, I conquered.

This would make the best drama movie ever.

Just get a girl she likes and fuck them both. That way, she'll be satisfied.

I'd suggest you move on, there's really nothing rewarding for you in it, it's all complicated and non-sense...

I understand your emotion, but you most also understand that you feeling something or being incapable of letting go still doesn't change the nature of the game. If you walk outside on a rainy day and stay hopeful that you won't get wet; you're still going to get wet. Thats the nature of what rain is. There are rules to this thing; and they have always been in place. I know hollywood and romantic fairly tale as altered the perception of what love is; but it hasn't changed. This very attitude you are displaying is the reason why she isn't with you today. She could run into me this afternoon and leave both you and the girl in a split second; if i have the proper attitude. There are ways to get what you want..Stubborn hope just isn't one of them.

_________________
Need Coaching? For 1 on 1 Coaching via SPAM, Phone or Instant Messenger - Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: 'The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom - Click Here

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If the other replies don't open your eyes, this one should.

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.