Need help with a bartender



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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 5:21 pm 
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There's a bar near my apartment that I go to frequently. I noticed that one of the bartenders was interested in me. One day, she stayed after her shift and bought me a few shots. She got drunk and started kissing me.

2 weeks later, I decided to ask her out. This was last Monday. She said yes, we went out on Wednesday. Dinner, then we hung out in my apartment. We just watched a movie, had wine, cuddled and made out. She even said that I'm such a good kisser.

She left around midnight cuz she had class at 8am the next morning. She ended up oversleeping and missed class. She works Thursdays from 12pm to 7pm. I went to the bar after work. We talked a lil bit. Then at 7pm, she said bye and left. I thought that was a lil weird. I texted her asking if she's going out cuz i thought she would stay for a lil bit. She said she just wanted to go home because she gets sick of being at that bar sometimes. I said, yea, me too. i only go to the bar to see you. She replied with a smiley face. Then i said, but you left me so i went home. She just wrote, boo.

Friday, I texted her, telling her to come over my place and hang out. She said she's just gonna stay home. She didn't work Friday. I said ok. She worked Saturday and Sunday but I didn't text her or go to the bar.

Yesterday, Monday, I texted her asking if she's working cuz I was gonna ask her to hang out. She said she's working. I said ok. Around 8pm, she texted me saying they made this soup that she's been wanting me to try so I went over there.

I couldn't talk to her cuz the cook, who knows me and talks to me, was by my side the whole night and he doesn't know that me and her hooked up. The bar was dead so it was just the 3 of us.

Every time she asked me to go have a cigarette outside, he joined. I texted her at one point asking if we can have a cigarette alone. When the other guy went to the bathroom, we went outside alone but 10 seconds later, he noticed we were gone and joined us. I ended up staying till closing.

I texted her, before closing, asking if she can drop him off before dropping me off. She didn't reply.

When she drove us home, she dropped me off first. I texted her asking why she dropped me off first, she said that she just wanted to go home. I texted back saying, you just didn't wanna be alone with me ;(. She didn't reply to that.

This morning, I texted her saying that I wanna take her out again tomorrow. She said that she has something to do tomorrow. Then she said another day. I texted back asking if she still wants to hang out with me. She saw the text but hasn't replied yet. That was at 9am. She's in school now so maybe she'll reply when she gets a chance or won't reply at all.

What should I do? I know that a couple of my texts were douchey and I wish I didn't write them. I'm off of work on Thursday and she works from 12pm to 7pm. I was thinking about not texting her again today and tomorrow and go to the bar on Thursday around 12:30pm to have a soup and a couple beers and possibly talk to her to see if she's still interested or not but leave the bar before her shift ends. Should I do that?

Do you guys think she lost interest all of a sudden or playing hard to get? Or maybe nothing's wrong and I'm just being insecure?

I'm 35. She's 31.
Her first language is polish but she speaks good English. She's been in America for 4 years. She had a green card and lives with her father.

I welcome all advice and criticism.
Thanks.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 7:19 pm 
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I think she's lost interest.

Suggest you give her some space, game other women and see if she texts or calls you over the next couple weeks... If she doesn't - she's gone...

If she does - you can give it another shot.

Looks like you're blatantly chasing her at this point and she probably sees that. Let her come to you while you find someone else :)


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 9:05 pm 
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You should have laid her man, point blank. Happened to me in the past, not anymore, if a girl is on your couch making out with you and then also spends the night?! take that shit as far as it can go, you dont hook up that night do it in the morning, forget her schedule its your world!
Basically she thinks you aren't confident enough to bang her so why hang out with you?

So stop chasing her, hang out at that bar with other chicks, flirt a bit, she might come back around.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 10:12 pm 
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Thanks for your replies.
Sucks. First girl I've met in a couple years that actually interested me.
I guess I was expressing neediness with some of those texts.

She didn't spend the night. She was at my place for a lil over an hour.


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