I want to settle down. I don't want to get laid, I want to find a girl as my wife. What book or video courses can help me?

Going through a lot of women will be the best way to find someone you are suited to, whom you have chemistry with, whom you can grow with together. If you just grab the first girl that likes you that's attractive you may realize in the long run she's actually a psycho and isn't suited to you at all. The best way to find a woman suited to you is to have experience with many women so you know instinctively, so you get a good understanding of women in general, of human relationships in general.

Read up on PUA, everything about it, including all the techniques, inner game, outer game, sexuality, and so forth, then go through the process of putting it all into action. Do that for a few years and you should be good to go.

I'm sure plenty of guys are in a very similar position.

In fact, the vast majority of guys who seek help from the PUA community just want a girlfriend. They didn't come here with the intend of banging a bunch of women. They just wanted to find a partner to enjoy a healthy relationship with.

I have a similar background. When I first started learning this pickup stuff, I wanted love. I was so desperate and lonely that the idea of sleeping with a ton of women had never even crossed my mind. I was convinced that I would be happy if I just met one attractive girl - ANY attractive girl - and convinced her to be my girlfriend.

I eventually learned that my goals were based on a very limited and flawed perspective.

You see, compatibility is very important. And, in order to learn enough about yourself and what kind of women you're compatible with, there simply is no better alternative to dating a ton of women and finding out for yourself.

So, even if you don't want to have sex with a ton of women, you definitely need to date and experience some sort of intimacy with enough women to understand yourself and your compatibility with different kinds of women better.

And, during this process, you'll PROBABLY discover that you want to have sex with a lot of these women, too. No need to force things, though.

Another important thing is your own maturity in regards to relationships.

If you've never been in a relationship before, your first relationship is going to have a lot of shitty stuff about it. Hands down. No question. If you let yourself learn and grow and mature from your experience, your next relationship will be better. Granted, some dumb guys never learn and they make the same mistakes over and over again, but in general the more experienced men will be more mature boyfriends/husbands/partners and will be better prepared to know what to do in order to be happy in a relationship, and will be better prepared to make his partner happy, too.

So to answer your question, the books and courses from the PUA community that teach you how to get laid will help you reach your goal of having a successful marriage in the best way possible, as long as you don't lose sight of what you really want.

If you're naturally extroverted, I recommend... everything. All of the material in the PUA community is really great for extroverts who really enjoy going out and meeting tons of new people.

If you're naturally introverted, however... check out the link in my signature

You still need to obtain her right? So the same rules apply as the would with PUA. You need to be able to build attraction with a woman through flirting with her.... You still don't want to meet a woman and immediately lock her in a relationship.


Now of course different rules do apply once you're IN A RELATIONSHIP.... but you need to get the girl first before you worry about that.

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What Chief said.

I have multiple friends that avoid this stuff like the plague, despite my phenomenal success with it, because it, "teaches you how to get laid, but not have a real relationship with a girl." - when in fact, it teaches both, and both are absolutely related to one another because of the whole experience thing.

With experience, you stop being intimidated by any individual girl. You won't let yourself be suckered into terrible romantic situations. You have standards, rules, and you can walk away.

Do you have sex with more women? Hell yes you do! Why wouldn't you?

Being in love is great, having sex with women is great. The only two problems I see with that are the following (these have both affected me):

Your standards and experience will improve rapidly if you really dedicate the time into this. A girl you wouldn't even think about getting now will naturally think about you as a prize and you will think of her as "sorta ok I guess". This has been my experience - women I was INCREDIBLY attracted to became average or even below average as my standards improved. Until you finally start to plateau with the quality of girls you can get, it can be difficult to settle down. If you start improving your life in other ways that are indirectly related to getting girls (more success in your career, working out, getting cool interests/hobbies), you'll find that it takes a long time for this to happen, and even ultimately that most girls are available to you (as long as you're reasonably attractive).

Second, and I think Chief was sorta alluding to this - you can get distracted from your goals. When you've got multiple women all clamoring for your attention and wanting you, it's very easy to forget that you want a relationship. I once dropped a great budding relationship because I didn't want the ties of commitment on me. It ended up hurting me and the girl and I realized it was a mistake after.

But these are growing pains. I don't think there's a man on here who, having put his time in, and gotten good with women, would say that he isn't happy with his progress. Just the fact that you have options, and you know what you're doing is well worth the time, effort and energy put into this.

I'm just going to be blunt here and just say that i believe that any girl you get using PUA techniques is going to be based on shallow psychological tricks, etc, it's "The game" Everyone plays it and what you want is outside of "the game" unless you use "the game" and it develops into something more but even to do that you have to stop playing "the game"

So in my opinion it's better not to ever use "the game" if looking for an actual life partner. I have several times in my life used PUA techniques to get a girl, even got engaged to a few. I fell in love but later i realized they were not quality people and i had just fooled them with psychological techniques. So that is my honest advice for you. I hope things go well for you.

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Wow.

Where to begin.

First of all, your website that you've linked in your signature.

"Learn How To Control Women." This is a tagline that I've copy/pasted directly from your site. You use this line to sell something as an affiliate.

Yeah, that really resonates with the comment you just posted. /sarcasm

Also, "PUA" stuff is very different from what you think it is. Everything that has to do with attracting women is technically "PUA" stuff, including the "natural game" stuff that teaches you how to "be yourself."

Fuck your comment and fuck your site.

To the OP, I have 2x questions:

1) how many relationships have you had?
2) how many girls have you had sex with?

It sounds like you are setting your target very low because you feel it will be easier to bag one girl long-term than lots of girls short-term. Let me tell you something. It's much easier to have sex with lots of girls short-term than it is to maintain a happily faithful monogamous sex-filled relationship.

You are coming from a scarcity mindset, which is unattractive to women as it can cause neediness. It's like when people limit themselves with their earnings. My buddies often do the lottery and say "I don't need to win the top prize, I'd be happy with just £1 million". This is the kind of mindset you are talking about and it is the wrong way to think.

Use your mindset to your advantage. Make a list of the qualities your perfect woman should have. Go out gaming and tell girls you are a hopeless romantic and you are looking for "The One". You'd be amazed at how many women will bend over backwards (literally ) to try to meet your high standards.

^ LOL!

Totally agree with Chief.

WTF? Please don't pump up misinformation to people who are honestly looking for advice dude. I'm in a healthy long term relationship for exactly 3 years now... and I would have never gotten her if it wasn't for being a student in PUA techniques. The way I got my girlfriend is by flirting with her, using cocky/comedy or negs, using push/pull techniques and Kino.

Being with her for 3 years I still use some PUA techniques which has kept the attraction stronger than most long term relationships. Now of course a lot of stuff changes when you're in a relationship with a woman so YES it is different.... but building up my inner game and learning to communicate sexually with women has been the reason why I've been able to meet her in the first place.

So Colby don't mislead people... I'm sure ppl come on this board and have enough to deal with all the information over load and figuring out the right steps to get over any obstacles in their dating life. They don't need ppl straight up lying to them.

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I hear Colby's mindset in a lot of people who have no idea what the hell they're talking about.

There's no magical "manipulation" button you're going to press with women to get them to date you, aside from straight out lying about your intentions or who you are. There's no "magical PUA tricks" or lines you can say to a girl to make her sleep with you. To anyone with any experience, that's just a crazy concept. The big secret is that girls want to have sex with you, and if you turn them on appropriately, they will have sex with you. That's it. You're not fucking tricking them.

Not only that, the ones who are married or really are in committed LTRs will link you up with their friends. It's an amazing world out there go out and enjoy it - but you'll never find "the one" until you've screened several.

I'm not misleading anyone. I'm giving unpopular advice that i honestly believe and have seen to be true from personal experience and from others. I personally believe anyone you manage to get from PUA is going to be built on a bad foundation and risky. Is that to say it's absolute? No. Not at all, but it's general.

PUA is for getting laid and controlling people. Successful and happy marriages aren't really formed often on those things. This guy is looking for a life partner, not just to get laid. Like he said. I would caution you guys about being so sure of yourselves. Everyone can be wrong and things are almost NEVER entirely one way.

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And to Chief, i have a site and i promote products i've tried personally on it, yes. I give honest advice based on experience and knowledge. This is not a subject that i believe PUA is proper for. What i've had in terms of responses is that i apparently "don't know pick up art" When infact i've been doing it for YEARS. Alternate opinions aren't automatically bad ones. Your comment was arrogant and rude. We are all just trying to help, if you disagree with me why not elaborate more? And leave out the unnecessary insults.

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If you're in PUA to simply CONTROL girls your mindset is totally fucked up. Period. That's some sick twisted shit. If you think it's about CONTROLLING people then you really missed the whole point and need a serious face lift on your inner game.

_________________
VIDEO SERIES Shows You How To Seduce Women In Less Than 3 Minutes Without Having To Sell Your Soul
http://www.manmindsetcoaching.com <-- Click Here

No no, i really have not missed the point. The whole point of PUA is you use psychological knowledge to do things you wouldn't normally do unless you knew about the way they affect psychology. That's why it's learned, studied, and taught. Controlling is the name of the game, controlling situations, appearance, etc. Otherwise feel free to go out to a club without showering for a couple days, with messy hair and bad clothes and just be yourself. Or even a step further, go into a club and talk about chess club and ask the girl if she wants to go on a date sometime. Probably not going to work out too well for you.

Most people don't realize the degree to which they control people.

_________________
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Site Exclusive Discounts And Exclusive articles.
http://gettingbeautifulwomen.com/