Hey folks,

I'm a complete beginner (in terms of actually going out and taking action....I've done some reading) at all this and I have a few questions about it all. Any answers appreciated!

1. I've read some stuff about being dominant and about how women find dominance in men attractive. I'm OK with understanding how a man can be dominant, but what I'm not sure about is what can be done in situations when another guy is dominant over you. How do you retain the position of being dominant without coming across as a dick with issues?

2. The reading I have done has been interesting but also quite overwhelming. It's been overwhelming because there is so much of it to read and I have experienced a sense of information overload to the point of paralysis. I have seen on the Anxiety and Shyness page of this forum that someone has put up a mission for guys to do before posting on that page, namely to go and say "hi" to all the girls in your local shopping mall. My question is.....is there such a thing as a series of missions that somebody has put together that would teach a person how to be successful with women? It would just seem a whole lot more simple than to assimilate all the reading material and to somehow formulate a working plan of action for actually putting it into practice.

3. The third question is simple: how long would it take for a relatively articulate, intelligent and determined guy to go from being hopeless at this to being good at it, roughly? Are we talking years here, months, weeks, DAYS????

Thanks guys

James

To answer your third question

I'm new to pua. I wouldn't say I was hopeless though. I've always been descent with girls but needed to be better. And had terrible anxiety about approaching most of the time. Especially the ones I really liked. It's been 3 weeks for me after reading and watching videos. I've gotten 5 numbers. 1 Kclose and hopefully coming soon an fclose. I still need work in escalation when first meeting women. I'd like to Kclose one this weekend the same time I meet her. I'm going on my second day2 tonight with two friends. Hopefully I can Kclose with one of them tonight

So what I'm saying is. If you can muster up the balls to actually go do this stuff, you can see results immediately.

1. make friends with the guys, hate just divides and makes you more hostile. If the guy is a jerk, pull the girl to you with her back facing the guy, so her eyes only sees you. but if hes just a normal guy, Id doubt he would talk to you while you talk to the girl.

iv talked with girls in my highschool with guys around, and the guys dont say anything. Treat them like friends or dont acknowledge them at all.

2. make an embarrasment of yourself, dont even focus on pickup, just focus on doing awkward wierd shit in public or normal nice things like compliment. when you get over the "Im scared what people would think of me" attitude thats when you can go into pickup.

How did I start out? I high5 people walking by saying HIGH5! and smiling too.

A good practice is to laugh in public without holding back, laugh without trying to hide your laughter in front of random people. It seems hard at first but when you do 100% your completely confident of yourself or you completely dont care what people think of you.

Youll see significant change before 1 year if you truly care and do this stuff. I had little popularity in highschool, in 4 months people would wave at me, greet me, talk to me, hug me in the hallways. In 4 months, I made more friends and im considered a crazy awesome guy. but honestly it wont even take 4 months to see change like that.

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1. Although initially appearing to be similar, being dominant and being a dick are two different things. Being dominant is having control over the situation where as being a dick gives off the appearance that you are putting people down just for shits a giggles. Too much dominance will result you you appearing to be a dick. Too little will be ineffective. It's all about finding the balance.

2. The reason you cannot have a laundry list of steps to do is that, believe it or not, everyone is different. Where as one might have a problem with approaching girls, another may just have a problem with closing. We each bring a different set of strengths and weaknesses. The challenge is to motivate new comers. Go out and challenge yourself without fear of rejection (im doing it tomorrow). Its not much, but its a step in the right direction.

3. All depends on how much time you put into it. Like anything else, I find days to be a poor measurement of how much time you need to improve. Obviously, someone dedicating an hour a day is going to see significantly less results than someone putting in 3 hours a day over the same timespan. The more dedicated you are, the faster you'll improve. Find something that fits your lifestyle and do it.

Hope I could help

Cheers,

Tainted Lust

Thanks for the responses guys.

I'm all for throwing myself in there and making a fool of myself. I'm in a band so I am lucky enough to get paid to play music to crowds and there is usually some time to go and talk to people between sets, so it's kind of like being paid to go on a night out and meet people almost while also entertaining them with some music.

I guess there's more than one way to swing a cat and I guess that everyone wants different outcomes. Personally, I'm not so bothered about developing a lifestyle of clubbing and nights out as I've done all that before and I'd like to experience other things in life.

Thanks for helping me to become clearer about the way I'm going to approach this.

All the best

James