How to get over ONE-itis?



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:47 am 
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I went out with a girl from work who I'd say had the body of a 9, the face of a 6 and the personality of a 10 when we first met.

She's was the first girl I'd ever even gone on a date with, first kiss, first everything and we ended up going out for 2 years. But I broke up with her when I found out she was sleeping with another guy in my office.

Now, its been 5 months since then and I've only been out with one other girl since but I realised that it wasn't the same feelings I was having for her.

Then I read the game and since then I've wanted to learn the art of being a PUA. However, every girl I see, I end up compairing to this first girl and think, whats the point.

I actually go out of my way to find girls that have a slight resemblance to her. Do I have ONE-itis and how can I get over it??


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 4:18 pm 
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i believe styles said in the game... go and score with 12 hbs! 8)


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 4:57 pm 
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agreed go out and pick up as many hot woman as humanly possiable then you'll be in the mind set i have all these beautiful woman around me all the time who needs just one lol it works :twisted:


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 5:27 pm 
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i do the same thing, in high school i dated a wild girl that at the time i was honestly convinced i was in love with, i think the main thing i admired was her i don't give a fuck attitude and the fact that she catered to my ego so well, she was also really protective which i didn't mind because i was convinced i had the hottest girl in the school so i was content with just being with her, so now i have a habit of comparing every girl i meet to her, i wouldn't necessarily call it oneitis though unless you find yourself unable to move on and sarge other girls, for me i just think my relationship with this particular girl just helped me realize what kind of girl i'm attracted to, i say just continue to look for those things that you liked about that girl in the other girls that you meet, after all you are the prize so you might as well go out shopping and buy what you want right? haha

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:39 pm 
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Talking about oneities ,
back in colleague there was this hot 10er who joined and all the guys wanted her too badly ,

ironically I was the guy she liked , maybe because I did not approach her or maybe because I was just being myself around her.

anyway things got tangled , we lasted for 2 years , and after that we almost got engaged up to a point where I could not handle the whole pressure of the relationship ,
so after I broke it off , she used to call me daily and ask and beg for me to come back to her (she lost her virginity to me so I was the totally alpha male for her)

after I rejected her soo many times , she got married to another guy who was a family friend. and at that instant moment , I started missing her , so after realizing she was gone , I went heartbroken , I could not eat for weeks , all what I did was smoke smoke smoke.

finally its been like 3 years now and im still cooping (god bless)
but whenever my sexual senses are on , all what I can think about is her her her. Maybe because she was the last women I got physical with , thats when I came to know about this world , the world of PUA.

Now im trying to recover out of the old mess I created and have a new life , but although we are far apart we miss each other soo much , but its just really time to let go


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:04 pm 
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that reminds me of something i read once, that said alot of times if you've broken up with someone and convinced yourself you don't have feelings for them you'll go to a party or something and see that person talking to a big group of people and they're laughing and having a good time, you start to miss them even more, that was just the example they gave, but in a way this can be applied to PU, because the same feeling that, that individual feels is the same feeling a girl feels after you've opened her, entertained her for a bit and then set a false time constraint, once you say "well i'm gunna head over here and talk to some friends" if you've gotten her interest she'll start missing that feeling of having you around, i guess this all relates to mystery's cat theory

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 10:24 pm 
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Here's a quick NLP tip (actually made it myself); BURNOUT TECHNIQUE

(it is of best use if you get an one-itis over a girl you have met recently, but it can work for LTR too)

Next time you catch yourself thinking about something you two did together, do this;

1. Stop the "movie" going on in your head

2. Focus on the flaws that were there. That is useful to break the "best time of my life" barrier - e.g. if it was a sex/romantic scene, focus on the bad lightning, no music/bad music, bad clothes, shitty bra hard to take off, and anything that separates it from the absolute ideal.

3. Focused on the flaws, burn her out. Not kidding here imagine her bursting in flames and disappearing forever from that memory. You don't care anyways, it just WAS, it is not now or will ever happen again. After all, the *flaw* was there, the *another flaw* was wrong etc.

4. Ask yourself, "Is she really that important in that scene? Or could it have happened with another girl? Was she just lucky enough to be in the right place in the right time; could it have happened with another girl you met that night?" Answer is, yes it could. You could have had intimate relationship with any other girl, accidentally it was just her.

5. Imagine other girl in her place; nameless one, just some girl. If there is a problem, open newspaper and use first girl you set eyes on. Replace her.

OR

5. Slowly make these feelings that were there go away - after all, it is just an empty scene now! If it is hard, first make the sound quieter and quieter, until it stops. Then imagine all the details - decoration, another people or whatever - disappear (after all, they were never really important). Then make all the furniture, scene or whatever disappear, until you are left with nothing at all. It is easy to dismiss feelings from empty nothing.

6. Ask yourself; "Can I really survive without that moment? Of course I can."
-----------------------

Do this with few most important memories (first meeting, date, kiss, sex, "I love you", most fun moments, etcetcetc) and it WILL help.

Otherwise, yes, focus on the flaws, her flaws and flaws in the relationship. Be selfish, needy, intolerant, childish or whatever you need to find them, but do it.

Carpe Diem

Carpe Diem.

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:04 am 
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i liked the guy's technique on dealing with this burn out situation. garbage in garbage. out

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:37 pm 
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Go and sleep with 10 girls. One-itis is over after that.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 12:58 am 
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Paetar that's derived off of Ross Jeffries filmstrip techniques :D

I like it though.

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