i am new to the whole scene, and i have been reading, obtaining, and using alot of this excellent information from this site on this hb 9 i've been gaming for the past few weeks. my problem is, i am getting one-itis. but i have never really gamed a girl before just always had girlfriends so its natrual for me to "fall for" any girl i get with and usually go out, but i'd liek to change and play the field. my problem is jealousy however. ok heres the story with this girl.

the first few weeks we hang out we hit it off great with her giving many IOI's and every night always leading to k-closes with some nights close to an f-close but to this moment still never got that yet ( she is very very respectul about herself and i've heard from many of her close friends whom i know she has never slept around so she is a challenge ). i've been getting closer to breaking this but i feel jealousy is now playing a role. as i've hung out with her more and become more attracted to her and the thought of having a g/f, i become more jealous when she goes places, parties, hangs out with friends, etc. ( i've killed many possible hook ups in the past due to always thinking negative like this ) and jealousy kicks in and boom its over my personality and everything changes. THIS hasnt happened yet but i feel it coming. as of now she still texts me every night and calls occasionaly. my question to you guys. how do you become from getting one-itis or becoming the jealous type? when i first meet a girl i have no emotional connection and i can game perfectly and hit it off with just about anyone, until jealousy hits and thats all i think about ruining my whole game. any help at all is apprectiated!!!! if you need any more information i'll do my best to write it out!

Just remember that its her chose to be loyal to you or to play the feild. You can either chose to accept her chose, and continue living your life, or get upset.

If she doesnt have a ring on her finger she has no reason to stay 100% loyal to one man. This is not a double standard it holds true for anyone.

Unless both people in the relationship agree to being exclusivly with each other then its only wrong if you let it be. This agreement can take many forms. Like formaly asking someone to go out "steady" or "exclusivly". Once the expectation is set if its broken then you have every reason to be upset.

However from what you've told me at this point you guys are not dateing exclussivly, and my advice to you would be to go out when she goes out, have a good time, game if you like, and keep your mind off her.

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Thanks Ka, and as i definately agree with what you've said, obviously everyone gets jealous at some point in time and its a part of nature, you cant help it. my question is. how do you or anyone else for that matter, get over it. other than going out and seeing other people, what do you guys say to yourselves as confidence boosters or words for encouragement to overcome jealousy. I still haven been going out and gaming others, just this past new years night i was with a hb 7. but i talk t to the hb 9 daily and hang out frequently. one thing that helps me somewhat is to tell myself that i was fine before her? i feel as if i almost fall into a false sense of attraction? i want to like this person so i do? if that makes any sense. are there any phrases or things any of you say to help you out with these circumstances? words help me a great deal.

Its an inner game thing. A mentality. Personally im not looking for one, LTR, but many. I generally tell girls this up front. I let them know its a 2 way street and that they are free to date whomever they want.

However like you, i have always had exclusive, long term relationships. So jealousy i am no stranger to.

You have to understand that no mater how you feel about it, its going to happen a certain way. The best defense is to be occupied, to realize they are thier own socail being and that doesnt center around you, and to be ok with that.

Pay less attention to her, dont respond every time she calls/texts/emails. Involve yourself with other people.

What you refered to as rationalizing that your attraction to her as "false" is rue in some ways, i have noticed it in my own feelings. Often times while gameing a girl i lose attraction but instead have a desire to close.

What ever you label your motive for countinued relations with this girl doesnt matter. Really working on your inner game is gonna be the best resolve to feeling this way.

Accept that her actions are out of your control, but yours are completely within your control.

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."