| The following mission has been field tested by many guys, and is really meant as a pre-newbie mission. Just about everyone who did this mission and took it seriously, found a huge reduction in Approach Anxiety:
Week 1
Understand that a lot AA is due to not only fear of rejection, but also fear of closing! You have a goal in your mind (getting her number, a k-close, changing venue, etc) and as you approach it is this goal that is also causing you anxiety. Almost like a huge weight on your shoulders: not only do you have to open, but you have to maintain the set and NOT get blown out!
So here is the week 1 mission:
Approach 30 sets this week, BUT you are only going to stay in the sets for 3 minutes. No more than that. You will open, and here you DON'T have to use an opinion opener. You can ask where the nearest Starbucks is, doesn't matter. You are just opening and staying in the set for 3 minutes. And then YOU are ejecting.
If you open with a smile, they are NOT going to eject you outright. This way, by the end of the week, you will have approached 30 sets and ejected YOURSELF, not having been rejected once (on the rare occasion you will approach a total bitch who won't even give you the time off her watch, do not worry about this, it happens.)
Week 2
You are going to perform the same task, but now you are going to extend the time in the sets to 5 minutes (you will eventually be able to gauge the time easily enough).
During this week, another 30 sets, but now you need to stack your openers a bit. If you are going to ask where the Starbucks is, now you need to come in with a story like: "You're not going to believe this, but I am probably the only guy on the planet that hasn't been to Starbucks, been avoiding it actually. But I am meeting someone there, and you seem like you've obviously been there before. Anything in particular I should I get?"
You want to start noticing during this week, if you are beginning to hook any sets, and if you are, what it was that seemed to hook them. Begin to take your body language into account. However, you main concentration remains, approaching, and getting over AA. And no matter what EJECT after 5 minutes, even if you hooked them.
Week 3
First off, enjoy your success! You've approached 60 sets, and chances are, you haven't been blown out or ejected once! Although this week.....you will! This week, it is going to be another 30 sets, but your goal is to stay in for 10 minutes. During this time, you will:
1) not know what to say
2) fall into lulls
3) get outright ejected
In other words, you will fuck up.
This is ok, and to be expected, this is really the beginning of the newbie mission for you. But, make it your personal goal to stay in for 10 minutes with at least half the sets. During this week, you should be using and reading up on MM material. You should not try this week until you've read the VAH either. These tools will all help you. Think back on each set during this week and find your sticking points, where did you lose the sets, where did you hook them?
Remember, much like the newbie mission your goal is NOT to close here, but rather to give you a series of small successes with little risk involved.
Good luck with it!
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People seeking to excel have continuous barriers to overcome.
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CHAT
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