Girlfriend and I have regular sex, I love it, she says she does also, and tells me she wants me to cum and often it is her who is trying to initiate sex, which I like heaps.
I've had sex with other women in the past and made them finish...but I can't with my girlfriend. It's not too relevant I don't think, but I was her first.
Weve been having sex for one month, a few times a week.

I could never finish, but I did for the first time (with any girl ever) with her last week, and since then I haven't had a problem finishing every time (new position Doggy is the freaking best)
Don't read on if you hate details.

She always gets close, very close, I can tell by her moans and movements.
Usually I'll finger/lick her for like 10 minutes while kissing her passionately, sucking her tits, licking up her body etc. We work up to that over a course of 10 minutes of kissing and caressing etc.
She then starts saying stuff like "oh my god I'm close" etc and I see signs of that.
At this point I'll either try to speed up the fingering, getting very tired in the process (hand starts cramping) and it seems she gets closer and closer and then just plateus, or I'll tease her a bit with my dick then put it in once she's begged for it and all that jazz.
Then I'll just pump slowly and deeply, gradually speed up. She moans and all that, but never finishes (she did once, but it was a small orgasm..not the kind I'm trying to give her).

The problem (I think) is that she's afraid of orgasming. She says it feels like she needs to go to the toilet and she's worried that she'll like...urinate or something. I've heard that this is how women feel when they squirt, and that if they are worried of doing it it won't happen.
Do you think that's it?
Or do you think it's more likely that I'm not doing something right? I'm open for criticism/questions about what I do exactly.
What are some ways you get a girl to cum?

If you want, your response can simply be a number of steps which you know girls love.
Thanks a lot!

i had that problem with my ex girlfriend everytime i'd perform oral on her.....it took a few times, and some work on my part to get her to just go with it....and surprise....she never peed!! but yea, the first few times she would grab my head and pull me up and say 'stop, it feels like i'm guna piss everywhere'.....and that was just stimulating her clit.........i was never able to get her to just go with the flow when i'd be performing oral, while having 1 or 2 fingers inside massaging her g-spot......she'd say the feeling would be so much more intense......i wanted to see her squirt..but she didnt want to pee on me lmao.......


but back to your story..... its common that girls that dont cum during sex... don't let the porno's you've watched tell you differently...do what you do...switch the positions up...when shes feeling really close, continue to drill her while she rubs her clit...that way she's getting both vaginal and clitoral stimulation and she'll be sure to cum to that

Its quite possible she is a squirter and is embarrassed about it, which ain't that uncommon with girls that never had it happen before or not that comfortable with it. I know this is unsexy but you should sit down and talk to her about it and let her know you are okay with her squirting so she feels more comfortable and relax about it so the next time she gets there she be able to let go and let it happen.
There are millions ways to get a girl to cum really.

work your bed game. lol.

feel her out. Some girls work different than others. Vary speed, depth, position, etc. note how she's reacting w/ every variation and remember her sweet spots. and change it up. keep her guessing until she loses it. if you only go into straight fwap mode she'll get bored.

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I finally chose the red pill

Alright! thanks for the responses
Strido, what's Fwap mode?

It;s when you try to get your balls to make that fwap fwap fwap sound against the girl while you shag

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I finally chose the red pill

...
HAHAHAHA

cumming during sex is something that some girls find difficult for reasons unknown to the male population. I knew a girl that was so messed up with her body that sex just hurt her instead of stimulate. but every girl is a different story.
I remember that my ex used to love dirty talk you know telling her how much she's hot and you enjoy fucking her and stuff so maybe that can help.
And going down on a girl never seems to fail if you do it right.

wait a second.

i'm confused.

she gets "very close to cumming"...then can't?

why doesn't she just play with her clit?

most women do that anyways, while you fuck them.

at least, that's my experience.

i fuck, they rub (or i rub too), and everyone is happy.

unless i missed the memo somewhere.

it can be quite difficult (or impossible, depending on the woman) to give a vaginal/g-spot orgasm just from straight intercourse.

and, also, none of this even gets into the fact that women are aroused and achieve orgasm by a totally different set of stimuli than men.

you are talking about all of your technique...licked here...fucked there...pinched here...pulled there.

women are emotional creatures. what exactly are you doing to make her feel romantic or diry or - better yet - romantic and dirty simultaneously?

do you talk dirty to her?

do you tell her how hot her body looks?

how pretty she is?

stuff like that?

if not, you are missing 51% of the equation..... trust me.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

He says she feels like she needs to pee and very well is a squirter and such she may not be able to relax enough to let go to cum. Its not uncommon for girls that never squirted before to be uncomfortable with it around a guy.

i'm familiar with the concept.

however, has this girl not discovered her clit?

it sounds like the op is putting way too much effort into giving her "THE BIGGEST ORGASM OF HER LIFE" and thereby making her uncomfortable.

you gotta start small.

how about some slow passionate lovemaking and tell her it's okay to rub herself while you slowly fuck her, makeout, and tell her it would be a turn-on for her to cause an orgasm.

this ^ may be a good first step before mt. st. helens.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Thanks Jurupa

And Mack yeah, I think I do the dirty talking pretty right....I'm not certain but I think.

Sometimes I'll text her before she gets to my place, just something like
"I'm going to make you tremble" etc. Not on it's own, but i'd initiate some sort of conversation.
Then during kissing I might say "I'm so hard thinking about your long, smooth legs. Me kissing down toward your thighs...getting a taste of you...I'll take my time and enjoy myself, and you will love it" or something, before I go down on her.
I'll comment on how wet she is in a cocky way usually, like "wow! you're so wet arent you? Let's see" and put by finger all the way in.
She loves to be bitten so I'll show her how much I appreciate her body by kissing her everywhere, moving my way up, biting her neck, going to her nipples, going back down etc.
The whole time I'll be running my hands/other hand up to grope her chest or massage her thighs, along her hips/small of back.
Then I'll push myself against her, but so I'm not inside, and say something along the lines of "I wan't to be deep inside you. I'm going to slide into your body, and watch your body accept mine as you submit and let me take control. You're going to love it as I fuck you hard and deep, and will willingly open your legs and tremble in ecstasy."
And when inside I'll talk much less, but comment on how tight she feels and how good she feels around me etc.

Is that what you're basically meant to be doing in terms of dirty talk?
Or are you meant to comment more on how pretty she is?
The other thing I do which I don't like, is often use similar material for dirty talk. I always talk about what I'm going to do to her before I go inside her, and wonder whether that because she expects me to say it (different words of course, but same idea) It'l get old or whatever.

sounds like you are doing that right.

just stop escalating to full-in machine mode to MAKE her cum.

you've got to LET her cum.

all things will happen in time.

i'm assuming this girl masturbates. lol. as most do.

can she make herself cum when she does that?

if yes, then why not let her masturbate while you watch until she achieves orgasm.

it will be a huge turn-on for you, it will be a huge RELEASE for her.

and then you can bang her.

kind of like a bonding experience.

it takes time for people to get on the same sexual wavelength.

i think a laid back approach of LETTING her get to orgasm in whatever way she prefers while you two are being sexual, is better than,

let's say, escalating until you are biting her nip, spanking her ass, fisting her, powerlicking her beaver, and calling her dirty names!

ok, slight exaggeration.

but you get my point. that method is trying to MAKE her cum, RATHER than LETTING her cum.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

The girl I am with now cums on the drop of a dime lol. I was literally able to make her cum through dry humping (I was in pain but it was that time of month lol :/).

I've had to finger/ go down on girls for what seemed like forever before I could get them to cum. So its nice to have a girl like this now, jar doesnt hurt as much and I dont have carpel tunnel.

Mack apparently she doesn't masturbate though 0.o
She could be lying...but she told me she has only done it a few times?
Should I encourage her to try it?

I like your points very much on "letting" her cum. That's some good insight.

And watusippin rofl - you lucky man