I get what you're saying and I understand that everyone's advice is well-intentioned, but I don't feel any shame whatsoever for past mistakes.

I plan to learn from them and continue onward in the right direction. I'm not going to get my stomach in knots about it, though.

I no longer feel ashamed about getting money from my parents. After considering the arrangement of dynastic families such as the Bush or Trump family, I can't say it's a huge deal or that it will hold someone back.

I agree on the inaction part, but if you knew me you'd see that I've come a long way from just a year ago. I'm moving in the right direction and I'm pretty happy with the results.

I am pulling a girl and getting free sex, whereas a year ago I was not. It's just that she's in her 30's and kind of trashy and has a kid.

Some of you guys are your own biggest enemies.

_________________
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My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

I actually have a name for this. It's called

"Making illusionary gain to avoid the real world pain."

If you "kick back and watch videos" passively, you will get illusionary gain. You will THINK you know something, but in reality, you don't learn anything at all.

It actually works against you, because now you know the rules of the game without even playing the game - and you're conscious of all the mistakes before you even say Hi.

If you spend 1 hour of your life trying to approach women (notice I said trying, because you're most likely won't do it because of fear) you will GAIN MORE than if you watch videos on youtube for 10 months straight.

Period.

Here's a question for you to study:

What is learning?

> Is it accumulating more information?

> Is it reading books and watching videos?

No.

Learning is CHANGED BEHAVIOUR. If you haven't changed your behaviour in the real world, you haven't learned
anything.

So I know it can be hard, but grip yourself, sit with yourself and make the investment of that 1 hour.

Do it once, then do it again, then again ... and soon you'll be talking to women.

Don't spend your time passively watching videos or reading books, it won't do you any good.

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Will spending time talking to the cute chick at the front desk of a hotel count improve my skills with talking to a woman?

If so, I at least did that, last night.

It was weird. I asked her to fix the card to my room and we just ended up chatting for a very long time.

No.

Newbie challenge. Do it.

I'd count it, but I'd definitely second that you need to do the newbie challenge.

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

It's the equivalent of doing a crunch. Does it count towards getting a six-pack? Not really, no.

If you want a good body you need proper training and proper nutrition. Systematically. And overtime you will improve.
Same goes for this.
But attending the gym once in a blue moon, purposelessly flying dumbbells around will get you absolutely nowhere.

That's the impression I'm getting from you Mojo. You're constantly looking for ways to minimize your involvement in this journey of yours. You want to get from 0 to 100, but then you spend half your time and energy watching other guys do it. Meanwhile you're still at 0.
Then you spend the other half trying to implement as little as possible for it to be "good enough". So congrats. Now you're at 2.
At 2. Out of 100.
And that's not because you're incapable or special in any way. It's simply because you don't want it enough to take it seriously.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

I'm just trying to encourage momentum. You know when you start taking action and before you know it, it's addictive? The army get up every morning and make their beds, to start the day productively (so I heard) now this isn't productive really... But it's a start.

I once heard about something self help related, which I'll call "the rule of one" - it was essentially "well I can't be bothered to work out so I'll just put my workout clothes on, drink my pre workout, make my water and do ONE crunch rather than a full ab workout" ...do you think it'll really end at one crunch?

I hear what you're saying, and if I went out to "game" at this point then I wouldn't count it, although I haven't actually made an approach in over a year (seeing someone) but he still did SOMETHING. Now we'll have to see if he really wants it or if he just wants to give up and pretend he tried his best.

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Jd from this guys history this is not momentum. Momentum would be he goes to the bar and doesn't approach anyone. Then he goes again. Then he goes again and makes one approach. Even if he can't approach what is holding him back from at least going somewhere he can? I'm all for small steps but watching videos and talking to a receptionist after Five years ain't it.

Admittedly I've only scanned the thread... but I find that once every few weeks we get a guy like this... for example the guy who had that ~15 page thread about his "ex" who was only a girl he'd thought about for a while and gone on one date with or something. My thing is, we've got mad with them all and it's never really achieved anything. They just dig their heels in more and it becomes a futile circle. If the guy feels like he's achieving something and we're impressed by it... maybe it'll give some incentive to do more and impress even more. Five years though, I didn't know that... yea, that changes things considerably if I'm honest. I'm not even five years in yet. You can go from Redstar to Jack Zero in five years lol wtf are you doing? Even Nathoonder actually goes out and approaches girls, and even got laid a couple of times!

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Or he'll just feel enabled because we said kind words, so he'll keep half assing.

I don't know man, I think honesty is the best we can do for him. And deep down I'm sure he knows he's slacking.

There's a difference between wanting the end result, and wanting to put in the effort needed to achieve.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

ER is a good youtube channel

Hey guys. I'm back. Yes, I know deep down that I'm slacking ... I'll look into the newbie challenge.

Where are you getting 5 years? I hadn't posted on here much at all until last summer I thought.

The thing that's holding me back is that I feel like a creep talking to women 10-15 years younger than me.

It's like, I know that some of these girls weren't even born when I first made out with a girl. It just feels "illegal."

I actually have a pretty easy time talking to women my own age.

I just don't understand how or why a younger woman would ever find me attractive in a million years. Also, younger women seem to pour on the shit a lot harder than girls in their 30's. It seems like the tests and disrespectful behavior come from a combination of immaturity and raging hormones. Idk.

Regardless, I'm on a "dry spell." I just started a new job and I'm completely exhausted. I'm not sure I can take on both of these challenges at once.

Then don't. You're not doing it for us, you're doing it for yourself.
We'll sleep fine either way.
If a younger one wouldn't, why would an older one be? If you're an attractive guy then you're an attractive guy.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Thanks. I moved to a job where I should be able to set my own hours within a month or so. I did this *deliberately* so I could work on my social life. Anyone who says I lack momentum is wrong. I helped get myself fired from my last job because of what it was doing to my self esteem. I passed on some other full-time jobs specifically so I could wait for something that wouldn't interfere with my social life. I aimed to work less than 40 hours a week just to address my social life. I will be going out more often once things settle down. I have been going to clubs more often, month by month, over the past year. A year ago I couldn't even walk into one. I said in another thread that I finally opened a girl within the past month. She was there with a mutual friend but I still had to push myself.
It's a single mom thing. Single moms just want a guy who can provide. My employment in software is attractive to them. Even working less than 40 hours a week I can make a decent living.

Young girls want a guy who is "fun", is good in the sack, has the right image, passes the mating tests, whatever superficial else, gets along with their other annoying single friends, and they don't care about career as much.

Hey I just ordered the 1967 book Pimp by Iceberg Slim. I found a 1987 edition for $1. Supposedly this book is an authoritative profile of female mind control. Interestingly, one of the things he mentions in interviews is about his formula is "never letting on that [he] had a problem or [he] was worried about something," aka "neediness." I'm going to read this...