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Let me introduce myself first. I have been doing pickup for about 5 months now.
I have seen immense changes in my confidence and the way I carry myself. I'm able to approach 15-20 girls when I got out. Of course, like anyone who's been in pickup, I do get rejected a lot , but I've been able to have some amazing conversations with a good amount of girls :I was able to have interesting interactions, make them laugh, never run out of things to say, and get their numbers. It seems like I have gone past the approach anxiety.
The one problem that really pisses me off: Flaking.
This may sound pitiful, but out of the 13 numbers I have gotten this past weeks, I was only able to go on a date with one. Yes, only one.
I know I'm still a beginner at this, that even though my confidence, conversations with girls and self image have greatly improved I can still do better.
I know that flaking is normal, but is it really normal that out of 13 numbers I only got one date?
The thing is I really don't know what I'm doing wrong. One time I was talking to this chick for 20 minutes: we were having fun, she seemed really interested in knowing me, she constantly engaged herself in the conversation, at one point of the interaction she told me she thought I was good-looking. When I asked for her number she seemed pretty interested in seeing me again. But when I texted her the next day, it's like as if she became cold and uninterested, as if all the attraction she initially felt for me was gone. What the hell did I do wrong?
This wasn't even the first time a scenario like this happened to me. Many times have I approached girls that were interested in me just to be flaked on when I text them.
Right now I'm confused and frustrated. If out of the 13 girls i had gone on a date with at least 4 or 3 I wouldn't be complaining.
So I wanted to know what do you guys think I should do in my conversations with girls to reduce the chance of her flaking on me? Has anyone gone through the same thing as me? Also I would like to know many girls out on twenty flake on you guys on average, that would really help me
1 Out of 13 isn't as horrible as it sounds.
How much time did you spend getting those other 12 numbers? I found a direct correlation between the time I spent with someone and the likelihood of flaking.
If I spent 5-10 minutes talking with them and grabbed their number I got a flake almost every time.
An hour+ significantly lessened the chances of a flake.
After a while, I developed the "how into you is she" radar where I could actually TELL which girls would flake.
I've also taken girls numbers with little to no intention to calling them back. Sometimes, these girls have contacted me until I ignored them and they gave up (lol)
I may have been having fun with them at the time, but these women simply weren't high value enough for me (e.g. may have been overweight, too many kids) for me to consider anything serious with them.
I'm not a snob, I talk to everyone, but I won't invest a significant amount of time with everyone.
Continue working, expect some flakes, and develop your "radar" as to whether or not shes into you.