Hey Guys,
I've been going out to a lot of clubs the past few months. But it's always been impossible for me to approach girls, or even initiate grinding with them. For instance, last night, I went to a club, and most guys would have no problem at all approaching, but I just hung back and kept to myself. I guess I'm just afraid of being called a creep or a pervert, so I don't do it. I feel that club game is too tough. Any suggestions on how to get that breakthrough and not be afraid to talk to any woman I see in the club?

Beginners challenge, aka AA challenge.

Week 1: Go to any crowded place. You will walk into the path of every girl you see, make/force eye contact for as long as you can. Take a mental note of their reactions. Immediately eject.

Week 2: Do the forementioned and immediately say "wassup!" or whatever greeting you choose. Immediately eject.

Week 3: Now go make eye contact with every hot girl you see and do something rediculous, like "HEY HIGH FIVE!!!" Immediately eject.

At any time you feel able, you may cut weeks 1 or 2 short and progress to the next step.

At any time you start to fall to AA, rinse and repeat week 1 then 2 and so on.

Just talking to regular people seems to help at first (bouncers, bartenders), wouldn't recommended ejecting as drunken says could just get you stuck on the follow through.

From what I've witnessed at clubs around here sometimes there are tons of really awkward dudes even the ones that approach. No game! If your objectionably outside the situation you can notice girls giving them signs they like them that are so obvious.

It's loud in clubs, you should have pretty high noticeable energy.

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Do an approach anxiety drill, google good looking loser approach anxiety... DO NOT DO IT AT THE CLUB, but do it in day game which is way easier.... Then after you have done the drills go back to the club, and if you still have anxiety ask women for a lighter even if you do not smoke or ask where is the bathroom or easy stuff like that.

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Start easy, just say "hi" to a bunch of girls in an area where you can talk, for example in the line or close to the bar. See how they respond and you should ease up (they will most likely respond in a normal way, specially in the earlier phases of the night, where not every guy has hit on them 10 times).

Also look into the specifics of HOW to approach. Depending on the area of the club, they change. If you are in a quiter area, say hello and start talking. If you are on the dancefloor, a whole other set of rules apply (skills360 above me has written some pretty sick posts on the subject). Knowing what exactly you are supposed to do already goes a long way.

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Do you feel more comfortable talking to guys instead? If you do, start there.

The guys that get called creeps and perverts are the guys that are afraid of being called creeps and pervert.

I'm not sure what you are expecting someone to say. There is nothing I'm going to tell you thats going to magically just make you begin approaching the next time you go out, but you just have to realize something. What makes every other guy thats in their grinding on the girls different from you? I see ugly guys, fat guys, even old guys sometimes grinding on girls at clubs. Its all in good fun. Besides, most of the girls are drunk as hell.


All in all, you just have to man up dude. I don't have a magic pill for you to swallow to turn you delete your creepiness. The only way to get rid of that is to approach, get rejected and realize that it ain't so bad. Girls turn me down every single day, but so what? I don't like everyone so why should everyone like me? I don't take it personal. If I approach 10 women a day get 4-5 of them I'm good. Thats 30 women a week, 120 women a month, and close to 1500 women a year that I have an option to have sex with. Thats also 1,500 rejections.. But isn't it worth it? I think so.

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