Hey guys, this is my first ever post on here and I was wondering...
How would you go about getting a girl into bed without tricking her into believing that you want to date her?
If you decide you are going to pick up a girl with only the intent to have sex with her, would telling her for the sake of being morally correct kill your chances no matter how subtly you do it? I have a feeling that if I told any girl this then, 99% I'd get blown off.

I'm new to the game and I've spent a solid week of daily studying, but this is a concern of mine that I can't seem to find any information on. I've slept with girls in the past and they have been pretty pissed when I cut them off or even told them politely that I wanted nothing more.

I have a few things to say here.

First of all, there are a LOT of women out there only looking for sex! It is perfectly natural but we don't see it because they can't openly display it. know this to be true first and foremost. If you find the girls interested in sex only, your problems will disappear.

Secondly, be discreet and tell the girls that you are discreet! Stop talking with your friends about how you banged Christina last weekend, it won't help you. If a girl trusts you and KNOWS you will not kiss and tell... Oh boy, she opens herself up in ways you couldn't imagine!

And last... Why do you want to leave them after just one bang? For me, the first bang with a girl is usually the worst so I like to keep them around to explore just how great the sex with each girl can become! I present myself to them as a "lover", and then I keep them around casually until either I or them want something else. No hard feelings, no jealousy, just pleasure. It works for me. I want them in my bed, but I am not a commitment kind of guy right now, and they love me for being that way.

Anyway, just something for consideration

Cheers!
- Andreas

Ok I am guessing this is not a joke so I will tell you this...

There is no way. Also I don't understand why you are telling any females you want to sleep with them. Everything should be mostly innuendos or implied...not sure where you got your training as a Pick Up Artist at. I can understand certain situations, but you are acting like that situation is going to happen or you are going to induce it to happen. You're trying to walk a high moral plane and without you telling them you want anything serious you've already took the basic steps in telling them you don't want anything serious...if that makes any sense to you. So NOT telling them is telling them. You don't bring it up, like "Hey, we are going to be in a relationship after this!!!" So why tell them that you are not going to be in a relationship after this?

I know the answer you're looking for is not this. You're looking for some "nice guy routine" where to not hurt their feelings. Well let's go to Disney Land and I'll have Mickey Mouse tell you all about it. I know I'm being an asshole, but that's the point You are not going to end it nicely, you're not going to be friendly with them again. You could be direct to the point that you are looking for something casual and see if that works, but be ready for a chance that it could possibly fail. It doesn't always and I know this from experience, but you don't have to take that chance.

Also what the other person said on this thread is correct, why just one bang? Use them or lose them. You keep in touch as friends, you get more lays from them on lonely nights if they're into it, if not you have one more female friend who possibly hangs around other females (We're hoping or she's weird!)

This other guy in this thread had another great idea!... Find the woman seeking a "friends with benefits" and don't be a big mouth to all your guy friends while high fives galore so they'll be knocking at your door again. Learn to keep a secret!

Anyways the conclusion is we live in the real world where if a female can't grasp that you didn't want more after sex then she can't grasp why you fucked her so fast. Unless she's just completely stupid as most previous females you've encountered she'll try to get past it, but wont want to be your friend, so don't count on it. Seek sex from women who want only sex or sex with friends. That's the only ideal situation for you.

Quit trying to live on some high moral plane because what you didn't tell her is not leading her on, what she's assuming is leading her on...remember this always

No. In fact, subtlety will generally hurt your chances even more. That's because YOU believe on some level that there is something morally wrong about a girl having sex with someone with no strings attached.

If you heard about a female friend of yours having one night stands every night, will you judge her?
If you heard that your sister was having sex with a guy outside of a committed relationship, will you judge her?
If you heard that your mother slept around a lot when she was younger, will you judge her?

If you answered "Yes" to any of the above questions, you're not ready yet.

If you heard that a male friend of yours was having one night stands every night, you'd be jealous of him.
If you heard that your brother was having sex with a girl outside of a committed relationship, you wouldn't think twice about it.
If you heard that your father slept around a lot when he was younger, you'd beg him to teach you his secrets.

Fix that double standard within your own mind first.

Once you're in the right place mentally, some simple frame control and honest expressions of your pro-sex feminist worldview will be more than enough to resolve your issue.

In social settings treat her like you have moral standings as if she has a boyfriend. Ignore her and flirt with other girls.

A more direct approach is to flirt with another girl but eye your target when you're talking to a girl as you're talking over her shoulder. It works very well. Talk, be focused on your conversation with the other girl but make eye contact over the shoulder of the other girl to your target. I really don't need to explain how effective this little tid bit is. Just try it, dude.

Also... It totally depends on the women. Some women want immediate investment or they lose interest. Others want you to prove your interest other than sexual regardless of what they're after. There is absolutely no one single way to get any girl. That's just a farce. You can not do it. Only certain women will fall for whatever you learn in pick up. It might work over time but majority of women require a specific skill set. Don't fuck yourself over by believe otherwise.

If you ever need opinions or help this is what the community is for... given the appropriate context of course.

Plenty of girls are down for casual.

If a girl is ONLY down for commitment, pretend like you're into it, and then act REALLY needy after you've slept with her. Boom, girl gone.

Otherwise, most girls are down with casual. If anything, they like it more. Especially girls under 25.

The thing I don't get about pick up is that you get their number when you close and then you meet up on a date right? Well if I'm not ready for a relationship how am I supposed to get to the point when I don't want to bother with all the bullshit? In her mind, we're getting to know each other and thinking it will lead to a relationship.
I could be wasting my time picking her up only to find out that she's 'not that type of girl' if I attempt to sleep with her straight away.
It's not that I'd only want one bang, its just that I'm not interested in dating her and really getting to know her because I want nothing more than a hook up/booty call.

Between the number and the date calibrate her sexual needs by escalating you texts in a sexual manner. If she responds then suggest the "date" at either hers or yours as there is "too much sexual chemistry going on"

Think of it like landing a fish: if you pull too hard the lines snaps but if you don't pull at all the fish escapes. Some fish want to be caught.

All girls you get involved with want to be your slut behind closed doors. Outside that context most of them want to be treated with respect. It's a dichotomy you need to learn to get used to. And when I say 'slut" that doesn't imply they don't want to be respected, but understand most women are equally if not more so hornier than most guys you know. Socieity puts a lot of pressure on them to perpetuate the illusion of purity, which really sucks for them. Imagine if you were chastised by everyone for having sex with women? It'd suck massively and you'd likely repress a lot of those urges till you felt safe/comfortable in doing so.

I would like to know how to go about approaching this with a girl too, I understand in public I have to not be like this treat a girl respectfully blah blah, but in private... I imagine I would just go for a kiss after some kino and whatever happens happens.

But, if I could establish that I just wanna be FWBs, I may not spend my time going for the kiss or anything in the first place, if that was not what she wanted.

You do NOT verbalise any sexual arrangement with a woman. You let THEM come to their own conclusions. If you're actually dating a girl and getting along well and it's clear you'd take her as your girlfriend then you can initiate if you want and ask her to go out with you "officially." It's the acceptable awkward "So, are we together?" A "So, are we fuck buddies or what?" will only make a woman feel like a slut and get pissed off.

This is a long as fuck post that tries to dispel some myths guys seem to have here:


There's an implication that if a girl is coming over to your place, you are going to have sex with her. She knows this. You should know this. Whether you can actually make it happen is on your shoulders - that's your job as a man/PUA.

If a girl agrees to come over, ever, unless she is ENTIRELY naive (unlikely except with very religious/sheltered girls, or very young (I'd be surprised if any girl over 18 acts this way)), she expects you to try to fuck her. Not trying to fuck her or at least escalate on her will be viewed as weakness. Period. If a girl comes over to hang out at your place privately and you don't kiss her, you've fucked up, no bones about it. Attempting and failing will be viewed better by the girl than not trying at all. Remember that, and internalize it into your very being.

The vast majority of girls don't expect a relationship out of this - they're open to it, but it's more of a, "Let's see where this goes" type thing - remember, to the girl, you have a high possibility of sucking balls and she has no desire to be attached to a shitty guy, and remember, she has thousands of more options bugging her than you do, if she's even remotely attractive.

ONCE A GIRL FUCKS YOU/FOOLS AROUND WITH YOU A FEW TIMES, THEN they might want a relationship. In my experiences this happens after 3-7 hang-outs with physical escalation (not necessarily sex, but at minimum fooling around).

You can counteract this by making it clear you don't jump into relationships - you have to make the distinction of liking her, while not wanting to be committed to her. The relevant PUA concepts would be "qualification" (making the girl feel desired by you), and "managing/establishing expectations". For a recent example:

I met a girl (former stripper, though this works on non-stripper girls too) a couple weeks ago at a bar. I invited her over to my house to make me cookies and to drink wine. We ended up screwing around, though not fucking.

I was very clear about who I am - I don't commit easily, she probably won't get me to commit. I mentioned how I'm planning on partying with the college girls when they get back on the campus I live near (I'm a 29 yo professional FYI). She said she doesn't do things except with guys that go for commitment. Again, listen to what the girl does, not what she says.

That's managing expectations.

For qualification, you still treat her like she's hot, sexy, fun. I told this girl I wanted to see her this weekend, and her first response was, "Oh but I thought you were going to hang out with the college girls" - my response? "Yes, I am doing that, but I'd also like to try to fit you in too".

This communicates that you don't need her at all, you have many other options, but you still like her, you're going to try to fit her in.

This sort of reaction is like girl crack. It plays into the girl fantasy of having a magical vagina that can tame the wild beast of a man you are. You can never let her truly tame you, but you can definitely play into the frame of you, the consummate player and lover, being drawn in by her charm.

Her response? A very playful, "I'm honored you're going to try to fit me in " - it was half a joke, but half serious. She's absolutely down, and I virtually guarantee that if I meet up with her again (and we will, if I have time), we'll fuck.


That's how you have sex with a girl without commitment. Most girls aren't looking for immediate commitment - immediately offering commitment is a sign of weakness. And you can easily get around that by maximizing your value, and being clear that she's special, but you're specialer, and there are a lot of girls out there for you.


Note, this works better on girls under the age of 27 (and in the US, over the age of 21 due to access to bars/more guy options), because around the age of 27, girls shift into a more solid commitment focus. That being said, this can definitely be used with over 27 girls, and under 21 girls.

thank you pikeman, that was gold.

Pikeman!

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RSDTyler

I take it you are Pi Kappa Alpha?

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PUA Maxim: Leave the woman better than you found her.