An area I seem to be struggling with at the moment when I am using POF is moving from getting an initial response to meeting in real life. I fear I am doing something wrong, or at least I could be doing something better.

Usually we swap a few messages before I ask if she uses MSN, if she does we chat via that. If not, i usually move straight onto next step.

Once I've chatted for a while and shown that I'm not the dreaded pervert they fear so much, i will invite her out for a coffee "sometime". Most of the time the lady will say yes.....then i'll suggest she chooses the time and I will choose the place.

And thats as far as I get. Sometimes they will simply not reply, or suddenly never appear on MSN again.....or we end up arranging a time/place then before hand they will cry off with an excuse.

How do others move from initial mail to meet up?

Thanks

OK, from the lack of information, I'm guessing that your online game isn't tight enough and you haven't been talking to her in real life long enough. In order to have someone want to go out with you, you have to be interesting and trustworthy.

Also, just a pointer, don't say "sometime" that is SOO easy to flake - really. I suggest you set a time and tell her to come with you. If not, then set another time that would work (making sure you seem busy) and make sure she knows if she flakes, then you won't give her another chance.

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You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take

Stunt may be correct...you may need to tighten your online game. However, you also need to realize something about many girls on those dating sites...especially POF.

Many girls will be on those sites, "looking for love" or to meet new people or whatever they say in thier profile. But, many of these girls are dumb. They will talk but never actually date or meet or even respond to any of the men that are on the site. This is silly to me, but it happens a LOT. So it MIGHT not be you.

Everything Stunt suggested are good, also, let her bring up meeting in person. if it's her idea, she's more likely to go through with it.

Yeah I've noticed that a lot too. I think its a downside of the site being free. A lot of women are just looking and will say things like "I don't want to meet anyone, I'm just chatting." I mean why bother! Stop wasting our time!

Ive met several girls from myspace. But they all intiatially messaged me. Basically i just leave a pic up with no shirt. But not one of the douche bag bathroom pics. Just a pic of me at the river or in the sun doing something. Not posing or anything.

Second, i make sure their profile is legit. I determine if it is legit if their top friends are females. And if their comments are responses about their weekend and stuff. Not comments like "hey you're hot whats up?"

From their it's pretty easy, just send a few messages back and forth then we end up hanging out. My main guess as to why your situation is not working is, they could be fake profiles and you may be talking to someone else who won't wanna hang out and is just desperate to talk. Also i would pimp on your profile page as much as possible so that the girls will come to you, cause then you know they are interested. I don't bother searching for them. I just wait til they message me since then i know they are interested.