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 Post subject: need help
PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 3:58 pm 
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hey guys say if you have just opened a girl on facebook and you start getting questions from her with in her first measage,or for that matter any questions any time whats the best way to deal with it ?


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 4:16 pm 
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Can you give us a little insight.

What sort of questions?
How did you open her?

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Rich


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 4:57 pm 
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yh it went how you been? what are you up to nowdays? do you still go college?.....questions questions


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:10 pm 
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I get the impression that you knew her a while ago. And Facebook has brought you together. At the moment she's just running standard questions. You have to try and turn the interaction so you are leading it.

So on the last question "Do you go to college?" Answer along the lines of Yes/No Im in my dream job and then ask her a question back. (Not the same one) then whatever the answer is make a assumption/statement about it. Then right at the end, almost as a p.s. Add another question built on that.

What you're trying to do here is build rapport and then find connections and reasons to see each other.

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 03, 2008 7:13 am 
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what just tell her the answer she was looking for ? and ask her a question ?


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:39 pm 
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Yes, the thing you have to avoid is asking lots of questions. You want to avoid a interogation. So when she answers YOUR question. DO NOT ask another question immediately. Make a statement about her answer. What you need to do is LEAD the interaction. Not out of some form of dominance, but because if you just go question, answer, question, answer. The answers will get shorter and shorter. And you'll end up at that uncomfortable silence. Statements need to make up 80% of the response to her answer. Its the best way to gain rapport.

So, as a (rather odd) example. Questins are in BOLD. Statements are in Italics

She says : So do you go to college?
You say : No, I've finished my course and now I was lucky enough to get my dream job as a director in an IT firm (or whatever). Whats your dream job?
She says: Oh Id love to work with Animals.
You say : Oh animals, that's cool. Takes a lot of effort to work with animals. Long time at college/university. See, that tells me that you're hard working and dedicated. Those are great attributes. Lots of people take the easy way through life so I like that you're quite deep. Where do you like to hang out?

So now, you're setting the questions. So eventually after a few more exchanges, you'll get into her qualifying herself to you.
Does that help?

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 03, 2008 11:55 pm 
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Great example RR, i like that. Remember also to throw in some C&F every now and then to break up the rapport and stay outta the LJBF zone.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 04, 2008 5:36 pm 
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interesting im trying to take this whole frame and in-bed it into apart of my online game,until my next sticking point,hmmm with the very least im goner learn something so do appresiate your's help,will up date when theres something to update on thanks


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