I find myself out in bars by myself quite often and I find it hard to create any easy opportunities for pick-ups.

The thing that bothers me is I look a bit of a sad loner when out by myself.

So is there any methods to look cool when out in bars alone which will cause attraction in the opposite sex, which would then make any approaches easier? Or maybe even having lady’s approaching me?

I’ve tried going out to bars and reading books but that just gives out the wrong signals and sitting there drinking alone with nothing to do is more than I can bear!

Any tips would be appreciated.

Thanks, DD.

Get to know the staff. When you shake hands with someone working there and chat with them for a bit, it can make a good impression. Alternatively you could just talk to customers... make light conversation with random guys, doesn't even have to be interesting conversation as long as you look to be interacting with people. Or, you could just go up to whatever girl and tell her you're there by yourself and feel weird without your friends, so you want her to keep you company for a little while. Just be playful about it, you don't wanna come across as weird. A warm smile goes a long way.

Open all guy sets and make friends. If you can successfully entertain them with guy stories you get social proof. Or just use your cellphone to talk to your "friends"... Or pretend to send a textmessage to someone.

Yea i agree with Soloman II. This gives you a great oppurtunity to go up to cute girls and open sets. Just tell them you waiting on you friends to get there and you would like some company. Like its not even a big deal to talk to them, you just want some entertainment til your friends get there. Hang for a little, not to long no more than 30 to 45 min, get the phone #, then tell them your friends are meeting somewhere else and you have to go. I've had some success with this. good luck!!

yup is all about framing.. just get chatting at the bar to anyone like normal.. "whoa what drink is that .. cool ... bag/shoes/jacket/watch"etc... .. if people ask/you tell people (and yourself) you are waiting for a friend, he/she is running late you'll find it's easier to pull off than just standing there trying to open feeling all alone

If it's late on and you are asked by a girl where your friends are I've sometimes found "they left with some really drunk girls a while back ...I have far higher standards" gets a laugh and puts them at ease.

dont forget the 3 second rule

as soon as you walk in, go to the nearest group and open them. this raises your social proof. then, move on to another group. you want to be as sociable as possible.

This is a good one! Copying this into my database; categorizing; and can browse/search whenever I need. Anybody else do this?

thats all in your head, your thinking a spot light is on you and everyone is looking and staring at you......really everyone else is just off doing there own thing and having fun, drinking whatever....... so just try and get that bad thought out of your head that your being looked at every second your there..

and folllow whatever tips above you thought were good as well

_________________
How You Approach Is A Matter Of How You Feel "mPUA Savior"

You Live What You've Learned

mPUA Savior... You are spot on mate!

A lot of this is inner game.

The tips above are good but look a bit text bookish to me.

Go to the nearest group and then open them up…eeck!!

Sounds easy on here but in reality you need to be super confident in yourself to go do that. I guess that might come once I’ve tried it over time on a number of groups say more then 50 and know the pitfalls to avoid…but as novice it’s a bit terrifying.

At the moment I’m struggling with getting the small talk going at the bar with people and not weirding them out. I worry about people getting the fear that a stranger is speaking to them… maybe they don’t? Maybe that’s all in my head to? ?

I’ve been working in a new town for the last 3 months and I’m going on holiday soon to Miami and San Francisco woohoo…Therefore I can’t use “I’m waiting on my friends coming” As it’s just not true…guess I just need to come out as confident as being independent entity and indicate up front that I’m not a clinger.

Maybe the best way to start conversations with people is to ask where they think the cool bars are as I’m want to plan where I want to be moving onto next… That way they will be getting the idea that I’m not hanging about but planning to move on soon, so they might not put their barriers up.

I guess I can only experiment and see what happens but tips are appreciated, gives me ideas to play with for which I’m grateful.

Cheers, DD.

Actually, Dundee,

I've always had it in my mind that it'd be easier when you're out of town because your excuse is that you're out of town and don't know anyone!

Of course, if you wanted to use that excuse, they don't know if you traveled with anyone or are by yourself...

Hey Fiend, it's no good to me in your mind.

Would you be so kind to go try out the theory in the field for me.
Then get back to me on what pitfalls and shortcuts you found.

Cheers, DD

Just kidding, feeling pretty fired up now so going to go into my holiday with some gusto and give a few things a try.

A good opener use is "Hey, i've been looking for someone interesting and was wondering if you could help me out"

you immediately DHV and there are no questions about why you're alone because theyre too busy trying to interest you

i used this one in the field and its pretty prime.