Okay, I had a conversation with this chick, and it was just casual talk blah blah blah. Then here's how it goes. I'll try and post what I remember, it was last night we talked on msn btw. I need help with what I did well, and what I should have said instead of where I fucked up...

Her: Blah blah blah... btw, I saw someone that looked like you.
Me: I know you knew it wasn't me though.
Her: How?
Me: Well, you would have ran up and hugged me...
Her: Hahaha... well what would you do if you saw me?
Me: At first, I'd probably run away and be like wtf?
Her: Oh...
Me: Haha you didn't let me finish... Then after I realized it's you and not some psycho, I'd give you a hug back.
Her: Hahah that's not good enough...
Me: So what would you want? A kiss?
Her: So you want to huh?
Me: I wouldn't mind it... I have really high standards though.
Her: hahha
Me: What would you rate your kissing?
Her: Ehh, I don't know I don't really like boasting
Me: Boasting means it's good...
Her:...

HERES WHERE I FUCKED UP!
Me: I'm sorry, I don't like cocky girls...
Her: Whatever - I wasn't even being cocky- I didn't even say anything

From there on I said someshit to just kinda recover, but it turned out horrible, and she just said almost nothing... I ended up just saying "I have work at 7.30... ill ttyl".

HELP PLEASE!

sometimes it's hard over msn to convey the tone of stuff u say. she's obviously taken it the wrong way.
can u post the rest of the dialogue.. it may help us dissect it better

I kinda forgot all the stuff we talked about earlier, it was just normal stuff like, how was school?, how's life? blah blah

So what exactly did she write that made you say 'sorry, I don't like cocky girls'? I take it there was something otherwise you would be screwed if she asked what she said. You could have pointed out what she said.

Reading your chat log, she hit you absolutely spot on. The neg came just a bit too early.

Nonetheless, I sometimes absolutely hate replying to just smileys. You could have just ignored it, and let the chat be for a few minutes. If she's interested, she'll check if you're there, then you can pick the conversation up from there.

When you do neg, to convey a playful tone, I suggest u end the sentence with the tongue out smiley.

read this.

"I'm sorry, I'm not into cocky girls. :p"

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My intro thread: thegunner-from-malaysia-vt28017.html

When I asked if she was a good kisser, and she said she doesn't like boasting, pretty much saying she's good and doesn't like to mention how good she is at it. So I said "I don't like cocky girls", which now looking over, was the wrong word to use. The word "cocky" i think was just too hard of a neg.

You did ok, with minor problems. Like someone else said if you put a smiley at the end of a neg they will probably take it the way you meant it.

Also if I where you, instead of saying "Sorry I just don't like cocky girls." I would have said something like "I like your cockiness, but right now I just don't believe you..." that is a compliment, but then you doubt her kissing ability. You could keep going with the negs (ex. "I bet you just move your tongue in circles...lol") and then the next time you see her you should go in for the kiss.

After you kiss her look her in the eyes, smile and say "wow, i was right about you being a lousy kiss" THEN SMILE AND LAUGH...

-Smarts

Good thread. Okay, when I read the first post I thought your first mistake was when you said: why get into the details of kissing on msn. Sure, it's fun but this is ideally a conversation you want to have in person, right? Such conversations hopefully lead to kissing the girl, but on msn that isnt even possible. Anyway, then i read Smarts take on the situation. I'd say i took something from his insights. I think his point that... I'm down with this advice, however I think i would have said something to the effect that, "I respect the confidence, but I can't let you be the judge of yourself. That's just unfair" In general though, same concept. Moreover, I really liked.. This was even bigger. A thread i read a bit ago lead me to believe that I am not properly neg'n women. My negs turned out to be much more of a joke than anything else. Anyway, this is a damn solid neg imo. This is especially true given the subject matter - her kissing abilities are on the line here. Your complete downing of her referenced kissing abilities is going to make her more affected by your response. You give her validation, she's up on you. You feign disinterest you have her curiosity. You actually down them, you have her wanting to prove you wrong ~ not necessarily by kissing you, but wouldnt that be the best way to alleviate any concerns you may have? Id venture that if you have sufficient attraction built between her and yourself this neg would result in a powerful urge on her part to 'prove you wrong'. im wrestling with how i act after physical intimacy has begun. I often become over flattering - afc perhaps, but i think it works well.. just maybe causes too much emotional connection. I do incorporate negs, though as mentioned they seem more like jokes than actual comments that reduce self-confidence. THis one seems unnecessary to me. I guess this is just a follow up neg and semi comedic, but I think i'd go a different route, something that builds connection / comfort / intimacy with myself. [/quote]

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I do what I can, but I know I can do better.