Over the last few months I've had girls flake on me most of the time. I must have agreed to go on dates with maybe 15 girls, and I've managed to actually meet up with about 3 of them. My game isn't amazing, as you've probably guessed already. It's being made worse by the fact that I'm starting to grow hateful towards women. I just don't trust them anymore. Obviously this is gonna have a big impact on my game. What makes it worse is that a lot of the times it was their idea in the first place - they asked me to meet up with them,and then they didn't turn up.
One girl flaked on me 3 times, and then she tried desperately to meet up with me a 4th time. I agreed, and then I said ''so what are the chances of you not turning up like the last 3 times?'' and her answer was ''well it all depends whether I'm late from the doctors''. Guess what happened? She was late. I didn't get a text until after I'd waited for her for half an hour.
Yesterday I agreed to meet a girl in town - once again, her idea. Texted her this morning to make sure it was still on, she said she would be in town for 2. It was fucking frreezing, I came out of college at 12, and walked around town by myself, bored, freezing, just so I could see this girl. It comes to 2, she's not here. I text her and ring, no reply. I get a text at around 3 saying ''sorry i didnt text back had shit to do''. What the fuck?! We'd agreed to meet up at 2, her fucking idea, and we confirmed it earlier. I'd been bored shitless walking around in the freezing cold for nothing. ARGH!!!
Guys, seriously, I'm starting to see girls as evil fucking creatures. It's as if they just enjoy fucking me about. The one problem is flaking, how do I prevent this? Help me out ASAP? Cheers.

i would LOVE to help you... but... the same shit happens to me a lot of times... I guess you could say you are too dependent on them though... always have options number 2. If they don't show up 15-20 minutes from when it was agreed; just leave and do your other stuff. I'm sure you will find something else!

For them, as i see it, you are simply optional to their life. This is what you have to change; be the one people want to see and would wait 2-3 hours bored in the cold freezing. TBH... really though... situation sucks and there isn't much we can do about it... just do not depend on women; you'll end up desperate and will never be satisfied . Seduction is a though world... just be it's master!

If EVERY girl behaves the same way to you, then it's something YOU'RE doing.

Can you post an actual sequence of messages between you and one of your girls? Whether it be a conversation, or a text message conversation.

Something about what you're doing makes them feel wierd. You get them attracted and then something about the way you behave makes them wonder why they were even attracted to you, and they have to find a way to back out.

"sorry i didnt text back had shit to do" - hahahahahahaa... geez! She wants to talk to you so little she can't even be bothered to come up with a proper excuse!

I agree with conker.

I have a similiar problem but it is slightly better than you.

I can get numbers and can get day 2's but after that I hear nothing.

The only conclusion is I'm doing something wrong to put them off.

If this is happening to EVERY girl you meet then you must be doing something wrong.

You must be coming across as too needy or you're not selling the date as a fun hang out which is what it should initially be.

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I know it is something I've done, but I couldn't see what it was, I may have figured it out but I'mnot sure. What makes this so confusing is that these girls seemed to really want it, and THEY ASKED ME out most of the time, not the other way around, so I must have built some good attraction in the first place. I deleted all of my texts, or I would have shown you what we'd said to eachother.

One thing I've noticed that has happened with every girl is that I've sent a message before meeting asking if they are definately going to be there. I did that because I wanted to make sure they had no excuse to not turn up (LOL) and to kind of show that I respect my time and didn't want it wasted. My guess now is that instead I came across as too needy.

Also, I've heard a lot of things today about the girl I was supposed to meet yesterday, she sounds a bit of a twat. I'm glad I didn't get to meet her lol.

Flaking happens. Either they are actually busy, or they're not. However.... If they give you "excuses" like that one - step your foot down and tell her.

That is fucking disrespectful and I wouldn't tolerate it. Make sure she gets the message and then either continue gaming her or change targets.

Seriously, that line would totally piss me off. Geez.

Yeah Zentrrode, that was probably the worst excuse I've had. It's ok I haven't tolerated it, I've fucked her off.

It might feel good to say you fucked her off, but it's important to accept that it was actually the other way around. Otherwise you never deal with the issue and just develop a negative mindset and start expecting them to do something bad, which of course actually affects your behaviour in a way that will encourage them to. Like you said, you were starting to hate all girls.

Based on what I've read so far, you are not behaving in a fun and easygoing way. To try getting out of this mindset, next time you set up something with a girl, make a plan B for yourself that you will get right into if she doesn't show up and you don't hear from her 30 minutes. (Set a criteria). That way you feel good about having something to do and not wasting your time if she doesn't meet the criteria. When she finally does get back to you, act nonchalant and tell her you did something else, and make it clear in your emotion and tone of voice (or SMS wording and punctuation) that your respect for her has dropped. Don't confront her about it directly, do it all through emotion. I believe that confronting her directly about it, coming across as trying to "correct" her behaviour when you've only just met her, will back fire.

Some of the best kinds of plan B's are productive ones. Things that are on your to do list that you never get around to - focus your energy and frustration into completing one of these important things. So it's like a win-win situation, either you meet the girl, or you get some task accomplished that pays off and you wanted to get out of the way for a long time.

And if you're really down in the dumps, (and only resort to this when you really have to) your plan B can be something indulgent - like a new video game, or a several hour stint on one of your favorites, or an awesome icecream. And THEN something proactive after that, hehe.

And never ever EVER get mad! Getting mad is a sign of weakness. Be firm, at the most. If you ever accidently get mad, or you decide to get firm - get positive and happy immediately after.

I'm speaking from immediate experience right now - I just had a girl flake, but turns out her phone only received the messages in the afternoon. She said she was really sorry. I tried to call but she was in the middle of baking and got her sister to hold the phone and relay what I said to her. I saw it all as being evasive and I said she sounds busy and ended the call. I then sent a stern message saying that she should have called me when she didn't hear from me cause we agreed to meet up, and that I wouldn't just cancel on her without a word, and that I was disappointed she thought so little enough of me to think that I would do that. She sent a longer message saying not to guilt trip her and that it was not a big deal that I didn't get back to her. It was hard but I realised (from past experience) that I'd reacted the wrong way, and I calmed down, and I tried really hard to think of the best, positive, non-wussy reply I could do in this situation. It turned out to be "Thanks for clearing that up. Enjoy your baking I'm on holidays so I can do the [what we agreed to do] then. Cool?" then I even sent one right after that said "Tomorrow*" because I forgot to say that in the message. I mention this because people say it can look bad to send more than one message at once, but in this case I think it was justified and also I think the strength of the first message also made it okay.

There was a bit of a delay (like 5 or 10 mins) but she replied - "Yep tomorrow is good. Let's finalise a time and place now just incase technology interfers again. Heh. Asshole phone."

From then on we had an up-beat sms exchange about what we're going to do, and everything is cool. We already have a bit of a history and really made a connection recently which would have helped us get over that little hurdle a little more readily. But I believe that as soon as you catch yourself being a stick in the mud, it's never to late to switch to positive confident mode.

Yeah you're right, as soon as I start expecting them not to turn up I start getting mad and try to make sure they do turn up, sending texts beforehand to confirm it, which is obviously why they all flaked. The first girl (the one that flaked on me 4 times) really wound me up, and I think that's why I didn't trust the others. Getting mad is also a big problem, I lose my temper really quickly. I'll try my best not to next time lol. Maye I am taking myself a bit too seriously.

A girl has asked me to meet her this Wednesday, so I'll make sure I don't fuck up. Would you guys say it's a good idea to text to confirm earlier on in the day or not? As long as it's just a little text? Where we're going there will be a lot of HBs, so if she doesn't turn up my plan B will be to just game some more

That is awesome man!

Came across at needy at first, then you totally changed it! When she threw the guilt trip line you changed the flow of the conversation and disregarded what she said! Shes definately attracted, but expect a lot of shit tests from this girl!

Cambria

Hey willieB.Long,your game is amazing so don't be down on yourself. its just that you can never prevent flaking- simple! Trying to eradicate flaking is like trying to stop a a speeding car with a feather. You can minimize flaking though. If you pressure a chic to date,she'll flake. Best to say,"Hey Alice,Im going out with some friends tonight at...,I'd be nice if "WE"(not I) can meet up. Then leave it there .But don't make her feel as though your going out is based on her going out.

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Thanks man

Ok, now that I drank some Eristoff Black I can give my opinion.

Flakes.
If she lies when she's flaking, it happens because:
1 - She's a flaky girl. It's her problem. Forget her, there are many other girls who'd love to have the privilege of hanging around with you.
2 - Your behaviour isn't congruent. Work your inner game. Behave always in the same way. Don't be a pushy pushy wussy little teenager. Say to yourself while taking a piss "when i see something i want i go right after it, and if i want a girl, i'll show her by my attitudes and body language that I want her, not by my words."
3 - There's little to no comfort.
4 - She's not into you.

If you want to get less flakes than go for the f-close on the same night. If not than make sure you get your toungue down her throat and your hands in all the good places.

A number is easy to forget, however a number combined with a good night is impossible to forget.