Alright so during the school year I was doing pretty well with girls. Back in highschool I was a total AFC and I really let it get the best of me. I started reading alot of pickup stuff online and started to get my game together. On the outside I was doing pretty well, but I still had a lot of inner game issues that are starting to get the best of me. During the school year I hooked up with a couple of girls, a few of them I really liked but I had trouble building comfort with them and creating a deeper connection. Most of it happend when I was drunk and it never went on for long after that. Some of my friends I asked for advice told me it always seemed like I secretly hated the girls I hooked up with. After I F-closed this one chick I'd been hanging out with and really kinda liked we stopped hanging out. I kinda shut down and tried to play it too cool and never ended up hanging out with her again. I ran into her at the store once and asked if she wanted to hang out. She said she was coming over and never did and then gave me some line about falling asleep and wanted to hang out the next day. She's texted me a couple of times and I was pretty sure the option was still open. I started getting really stressed out with work, college and my career choice. I had to start seeing a psychiatrist and they told me I had some mommy issues. She was really overbearing and didn't understand boundaries. It used to really bother me growing up. They also said I was clinically depressed and wanted me to take zoloft. I never did because I want to ride this out and learn to deal with it instead of taking medication.

Over the summer i've been interning at an art camp and it's a really tough place to socialize. Everyone there is really smart and talanted and being around them makes me feel pretty lame. I know I have what it takes to make it far in my field i've just felt completely drained of energy trying to sort this stuff out. It's hard to stay focused on my goals. I've been talking to a couple of girls around camp and thought I was doing a pretty good job because we hang out alot, but sometimes it feels like a battle of intelligence talking to them. At lunch today they mentioned something about going to some expensive restaurant with a bunch of band managers and watching a movie. I don't really know how to interpret that but it kindof got me down. It's hard to keep up the energy and do a good job in social situations. I used to play the nice guy, but now I end up coming off cold and unfriendly.

Anyway, I was talking to one of my good friends about this and he said it sounds like I need to start being myself a little more and let girls know I actually like them. He's pretty good with girls so I normally trust his advice. He said he's seen me do fine with some really nice chicks I just always send out the vibe that I don't really like them.He recomended I send the girl back at college a message on fb and I think I sort of screwed up. I haven't heard back from her yet and i don't wanna dig the whole any deeper.

I'll post the message so you guys can give me some advice.

Hey,

I just wanted to let you know that you're a pretty cool chick... even if you're a little crazy sometimes. And back at college I really did like you, it doesn't matter if you liked me back or not... I just needed to get that off my chest.

P.S. Not trying to be creepy

So what do you think guys... is this totally screwed. Any advice would be awesome.

Never tell anyone you like her with text (IM, email, SMS, postcard, twitter, social networking sites, etc.

Anecdote: The last time I made an exception to this, when a potential fb I hadn't seen in 3 years msged me that she's coming back from college and wants to hang out. We started texting and she wanted to make sure we were gonna be more than just friends when we meet up. I reframed my response several times but she kept asking if I like her and what I wanna do with her. After I told her were gonna be more than just friends, she only sent a few more texts and flaked out the 2 times we planned meet up.

This is when IT WAS OBVIOUS SHE WANTED IT. But it killed the sexual tension when I admitted I liked her. What I would have done is tell her I have a gf; if she asks about that when we hook up, tell her was just fuckin wit her.

So save the honestly I like you're already together with her and isolated. But if you do that it should be from a point of abundance, not neediness, and when you're sexual escalating.

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does anyone have any advice on what I should do though, I know I screwed up on this one... I was not in the right state of mind. But ever since I sent out that message It's all I can think about, I know it sounds lame but I'm still checking fb all the time to see if she's responded.

Alright, so today I finally got a reply

She said,

Oh I don't think your creepy. I also think your pretty cool thanks for putting up with my craziness. I usually don't tell people that I have human emotions but I liked you as well when you were around.

I don't really know how to take this, and I also feel like I'm gonna screw this up trying to reply because I've been so off on my game lately. I don't understand why she waited so long to reply, I know she's been on facebook since then. I'm not home right now so I can't hang out with her for another month... any advice would be really helpful, I don't really know how I should respond to this one.

I dont wanne say to much about on this matter ( I dont know if Im the right person), but sometimes I too feel pretty shitty myself, and I've then started acting like jerk to people around me, and to people I really like.

Here are some thoughts:

What if you were to meet up with this girl, without having a sexual motive.
I have only one really good friend who is a girl, and she's infact the one I turn to when it feels like Im drowning in shit. Sometimes and dont know what it is she got that makes me feel so good, but its something that makes me feel safe and good about myself.


Get to know this girl really good, spend time with her, do fun stuff that takes you out of the state your in. If you feel like having sex with her - jerk off and see if the feeling is still there. Or do you just feel that you need somebody to talk to? Someone who thinks you're important?

I think its hard to solve problems with your inner game with temporary solutions.
Like a new girl, etc. (Im not saying this girl is) But, if things you bad, chances are good you'll be right back where you are now.

PUA is all about not being put in the nice-guy-friendbox.
But sometimes its really good to have a girl just for talking.

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Vino, vedi, vici.
I drank some wine, I saw her, I conquered