I'm not really gaming this girl, I'm just stuck for what to say. I'm always trying to improve my social skills. I sucessfully gamed this girl in the past, but we only occasionally talk now.

(she died her hair crazy redish)

Me: holey moley, you're a crazy-hair girl

Her: is that a problem?

Me: well I wasn't going to say anything. But since you brought it up........

Her: blah. whaterver. I like it

Me: ????


(she's obviously trying to keep her frame, how do I respond while keeping mine. this is a very short-simple convo, but has great potential for learning frame control)

well if you were trying to neg her it might have sounded like you insulted her was she pissed off?

it was online.

yeah, it sounds like I was just rude. I shoulda added a little (nudge nudge, elbow elbow) in there.

how to recover?

she has a smiley in there, i dont think she took it the wrong way. She is wanting your approval.

Ask her what look she was going for. Then neg her. tell her how you would like it instead. Make her validate to you.

Girl i knew was trying for the rockstar look, bleach blonde with a good portion of her tips black about 6 inchs up. i commented:

Yea its cute! i can see where you where going with it, but if You take the black portion and made those tips red or better yet purple...thats pure rockstar!

Two days later she did it.

of course online put some emotion in your words

~ Mystic

_________________
"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."