Can't move after opener



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A Sticking Point or SP is an issue you CONSISTENTLY run into.

It is NOT a point where you get stuck with ONE SPECIFIC GIRL.

A Sticking Point is:
Quote:
I keep getting LMR whenever I bring girls back to my place. This has happened at least 10 times already! What am I doing wrong?
A Sticking Point is NOT:
Quote:
I got LMR with this one girl! What do I do?
IT IS AGAINST THIS BOARD'S RULES TO POST THREADS ABOUT JUST ONE GIRL
If you have not already gone out and practiced enough to have a real Sticking Point from meeting an ABUNDANCE of women, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO POST HERE.



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 Post subject: Can't move after opener
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2015 8:46 am 
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I am very new and have been out for the last 3 weeks trying to sarge by myself. I get into issues after opening a girl. I feel that after the opener I try to transition to attraction but can't. I think sometimes I go into comfort after opener and maybe that's my problem but girls who I talk to seem to lose interest after a while. I think the issue is I make it seem like I like them and don't do much to make them feel they can lose me. But i feel that I don't do well enough to say I build attraction. Its becoming a huge sticking point for me. so I could go into another phase. I've been going to the same club and now I feel that the next time I go I am going to look like the weird guy that hits on girls by himself. You know it really bad but i tend to get very drunk so I can deafen the approach anxiety. I feel like I need a page one rewrite. Really don't know exactly what my sticking point is but I feeling a bit discouraged.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2015 2:16 pm 
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First of all, stop getting drunk, that will massively and negatively affect your game. Don't feel like you need to come up with any clever routines or topics to show off and gain attraction. All you really need to do is have a normal conversation. Ask her about her day, what she does etc. But what you need to do is be direct in your vibe. It can be all about how you look at her and the tone of your voice. Display your sexuality. After all, she knows why your there. So be honest about it. Obviously not just by saying 'ive come over to pick you up" (except that could be one way to go if your feeling confident enough". But by how you present yourself to her, she will know that you find her attractive and want to hit on her. So once you feel like she's mirroring your sexual vibe you can then move your verbal conversation forward. What the conversation your having with her verbally is almost irrelevant. It is the conversation youre having with your bodies that matters.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 2:50 am 
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Thanks man. I'll definitely take that advice to heart the next time I am out. But what do you say about the whole solo sarging thing?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 7:26 am 
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I agree with rockstar. I have sarged solo since I discovered "game" and it can be quiet challenging. You have to be your own motivator because there is no one or a wing to feed your ego and point out your mistakes to you, especially body language.

Sarging solo has given me a tough skin though. I don't wait on friends to go out. If you have an interesting life and you have stuffs going on for you, you'll meet women every day.

Don't be outcome dependent, don't rely on routines even though 1 or 2 would spice up things, just interact and have fun.

_________________
"Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own." - Bruce Lee


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 12:23 pm 
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The best solution would be to find a wing who pushes you to take action.
If you can't find any, you have to put down a plan for yourself and get methodical about it. List all your sticking points and think about a way to overcome them.

And a really important thing that nobody does, is to keep a daily diary. It could seem stupid to you, but keep tracks of your progresses is pure gold. At the end of every day ask yourself two questions:
- What did I do today to improve my life?
- What should I work on?
And write the answers on your diary. You'll see a total change in your situation!

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http://bit.ly/get_academy


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 12:48 pm 
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Quote:
Thanks man. I'll definitely take that advice to heart the next time I am out. But what do you say about the whole solo sarging thing?

It's all in your head.

Stop getting smashed off booze. Google "how to transition"

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 3:39 am 
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Thank you gentlemen for your response. I've had better nights where I could transition but that last time was bad. The thing is I was trained as an actor the the canned routines do kinda work. But I will make it more of a conversation and not stick to a script too much. I think I need to keep a diary better and list my sticking points better. I also believe I need to start relating the conversation back to me and make it us. I think I get lost when I make it about her when I have been able to transition. Thank you again.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 9:27 am 
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I only read the first couple sentences of your original post.

You are stuck in pua lingo.

If you've ever had a girlfriend, just think of this whole PUA bullshit as you meeting a g/f, and all the things that went along with that, happening in a shorter time horizon.

Ultimately that's what all this shit boils down to.

Stop thinking about A4 phase and comfort phase and all that irrelevant bullshit.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 12:43 am 
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You must be CLEAR in your intent before you even open the girl. What I mean is that before you even go in... your intent should be to fuck her and pull her that night. From there depending on a million different variables, you will be calibrating her comfort levels and seeing where you can escalate the interaction.

Funny thing is most girls (not all however) will lets you be very physically right from the open if you just assume it and act with your own intent.

This is a higher level of game because you must first learn how to be entitled to this sort of physical behavior, which normally comes through fucking lots of other girls Lol.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 08, 2015 6:09 am 
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Thanks guys. I do feel like i have a bit of tendency to focus on the lingo and not just being in the present moment naturally. I have been doing that lately, and been kinda successful. I've been steadily talking to this girl, made out first night still talking. But i am trying to be more consistent. I will try the approaching with more attent. I have had a GF before and tried doing that with a girl i met on Bumble (dating app) but because she was already attracted to me it wasn't hard. I need to work on my cold approaches.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 15, 2015 6:47 pm 
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Quote:
Thanks guys. I do feel like i have a bit of tendency to focus on the lingo and not just being in the present moment naturally. I have been doing that lately, and been kinda successful. I've been steadily talking to this girl, made out first night still talking. But i am trying to be more consistent. I will try the approaching with more attent. I have had a GF before and tried doing that with a girl i met on Bumble (dating app) but because she was already attracted to me it wasn't hard. I need to work on my cold approaches.
Stop trying to talk your way into a girls heart/pants, especially if you're at a nightclub.

Escalate, escalate, escalate. Judge her responses and then adjust appropriately.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2015 7:22 am 
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Thanks man.


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 30, 2015 3:18 am 
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There is no real "transition" to attraction. It starts from the moment you say "Hi" and if you don't approach with the right vibe you have limited time to recover it. So it's not about doing an "opener", but already knowing in your heart you're worthy of her and you have something to offer before you even open your mouth. So it in the back of your head that you're are hoping she validates you when you approach by being responsive. More likely than not it won't go well.

Sometimes this can all in the little things. And being grounded in the value of yourself helps. Even a little shift like making strong eye contact can demonstrate this when you approach can make all the difference. Women tend to have a stronger radar and intuition for these type of things. Women are receivers of energy as part of their feminine nature, so it's all about your energy first.

Most of all just have "fun" with the moment. When you approach don't be so focused on the outcome. Just go with the attitude that it's a fun thing to do to approach and whatever comes out of it it's a good thing and your growing. That way you seem less needy and also relieves the pressure. Making it easy for you to flirtateous, which is supposed to be a fun thing to do as well. I mean this is called Game after all. Things with the name Game are supposed to be fun :)

Quote:
I am very new and have been out for the last 3 weeks trying to sarge by myself. I get into issues after opening a girl. I feel that after the opener I try to transition to attraction but can't. I think sometimes I go into comfort after opener and maybe that's my problem but girls who I talk to seem to lose interest after a while. I think the issue is I make it seem like I like them and don't do much to make them feel they can lose me. But i feel that I don't do well enough to say I build attraction. Its becoming a huge sticking point for me. so I could go into another phase. I've been going to the same club and now I feel that the next time I go I am going to look like the weird guy that hits on girls by himself. You know it really bad but i tend to get very drunk so I can deafen the approach anxiety. I feel like I need a page one rewrite. Really don't know exactly what my sticking point is but I feeling a bit discouraged.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 4:41 am 
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I really appreciate the kind words and perspective. Since that time I've adopted more of a just have fun mentality which has helped. Those words of encouragement mean a lot. I actually had a really good day game pick up which happened very spontaneous and allowed me to use all these techniques. Got a number, so hey. BUt I do have one question; what do u do in the club. Its so fast pace and you need to have this I am going to get you and quick confidence I just feel i can't tap into. I talk them to death. How do I not do that. Escalting and playful teasing more and less talking?


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