ok so whenever im in a club if im at the bar and see a girl is standing next to me ill usually open pretty well simple hi whats your name hows your night etc. but what i really begin to struggle with is carrying on my game from them, how do i build attraction? so after saying hi whats your name hows your night i just become a bit lost and begin to sort of trying to get the girls attention instead of looking confident and that they have to try and get my attention. so how do i build attraction and interest?

Your starting off the right way, first you need to open, you did that. Next you need to talk to her. Your playing not to lose, instead of playing to win. Therefore, you try to hold the girls attention because you're concerned her attention will not be on you. All the guys I know that are good with woman never think about holding the girls attention.

Holding the girls attention is neediness, it's looking for outcome, in short it's looking for VALIDATION. I'll tell you a small secret I learned though the years. If you really want to get rid of Validation seeking, you have to associate it with negative experiences you have and trust me you will never seek validation anymore. For example think about a experience when you tried to make a move on a girl out of validaton(neediness) and the girl though it was creepy, how terrible, disgusting did you feel. This is what seeking validation is its a terrible disgusting trait. From now on when you do moves out of validation seeking and have negative experience associate it to validation seeking.

The opposite of validation seeking is freedom from outcome. Now thing about experiences when you were free from outcome and didn't give a shit about holding the girls attention, when it was all about yourself, when you felt like a boss. How did that feel? Great, right? Well associate that experience to freedom from outcome and in a little while you'll see, you will be so repulsed by validation seeking you will stop doing it altogether.

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"Experience is the teacher of all things"

thank you mate a lot of helpful advice I will use it next time I am out. one more question what is a good way of showing im not looking for validation I mean I want to have conversations but not bore the girl. what should I say after opening to make them interested and want to carry on talking to me?

Truly there is no way of hiding you're seeking validation. The only way is to actually stop seeking it. Girls can smell it from miles away. If you want to make the conversation more interesting be very polarizing unapologeticly. Talk about exactly what you like but don't be over energetic at first. Some tips to keep in mind that will help you.
- Don't smile too much. Don't have a too serious face. Just indifferent face. At first it will seem unnatural to you but you'll get used to it. Girls will be gigling to you and at their best behavior just do it and see watch.
- Very important, use down talk instead of up talk. Up talk is when your sentences go higher pitch at the end. For example you say "do you wanna go to the coffee place with me". and your voice gets higher at the end, making it sound like a question. Instead do down talk. Lower pitch at the end. Sort of like you would say a statement. (When you combine this with the above tip you will get unbelievable results)
- Slow down when you talk
- Have eye contact when you talk. I was one time telling a girl something but had strong eye contact and asked her to repeat the story to me. She didn't even remember it (3 mins after i told her the story). This shows it's the subcummunication that matters most not what you say.

_________________
"Experience is the teacher of all things"