hello

I'm 23 yrs old, short about 5’4, I look like a teen, and I look much younger than my friends, I have no problem with the way I look and many girls tells me that I'm good looking "sometimes they call me cute X( " but I hate how others don't give much value based on my physical appearance, I guess they assume that I'm just a boy or whatever.

The real problem is not about my physical appearance but it’s about my social skills,
I don't talk that much and I've been like that since I was a kid ,"introverted" would be a better description, this was happening with my relationship with my family too (it's getting better now )

now I wanna change that and become more social ,but I'm not used to dial with ppl ,some calls me shy but I don't think I'm being shy I just don't know what to say or what to do.

I often find myself in a situation where I don't know what my friends r talking about (shit tests or jokes)and because I don't get the terms or the jokes I come as stupid or Innocent who doesn't get it.

this lower my value and makes me feel afraid to participate again , I was once on a trip with one of my friends who brought two of his, the trip was horrible because I lacked the social skills, one of them was aggressive, so while we were talking I looked like an awkward and angry (which I wasn't),it became like a confrontation , I never saw the two of them again, my friend told me later that I'm being too serious and I should have more fun, I don't care about them but I wanna be able to adapt and make friends not the opposite.

today I had a guest who talked about my colleague(he's gay) and mentioned that my colleague had an argument with him and my colleague got upset, the guest told me that he was being sensitive and should be more polite with his guests at the hotel,, (nothing offensive actually) I didn't know how to respond so I said few words and I got silent, it was awkward, he asked if I was offended or angry because of what he said I told him no (I wasn't angry but I looked angry to him because I didn't say that much) it was awkward moment, he said that he doesn't have a problem with my friend and he apologize if he said anything wrong.... all this happened due the fact that I didn't know what to say at that situation.

I don't like this, and I’m planning to improve my social skills

any ideas or guild lines??

_________________
"you're responsible for how ppl views your character"

Working on your general social skills is important. It's hard to be smooth with girls when you feel off in your everyday life.

A few suggestions...

- Watch more stand-up comedy. Develop a sense of humour. Even start learning about the stand-up craft. (Read books or take classes.)

- Practice small talk. Practice with cashiers, salespeople, and others who are paid to be nice to you. If you're not used to talking, you'll have a hard time finding something to say when you're put on the spot. Always be talking.

- If you have to, come up with a topic you enjoy talking about for every letter of the alphabet. (A: alcohol, B: Barcelona trip, C: your crazy cousin...) That way you're never caught without anything to talk about.

- Isolate friends who make you feel good to be around them, and who make you feel more comfortable talking. Spend more time with those and less time with the others, at least until your habits start to change.