Can`t believe I`m using this as an analogy, but it explains perfectly my situation with pick up.

Imagine for a second that you are a great driver, you don`t make too much mistakes, and when you do, you are fully aware of it. You can correct yourself by your own.

Imagine that when you drive with your friends, co workers and such you are really smooth and a relaxed driver.

Now for one second, imagine the frustration that comes from you not being able to be that smooth driver with the one person that really counts, that really matters: the traffic inspector.

Yesterday was my third time I lose the exam, so I don`t have my license yet; and yes, I know that I`m not the only person in the world having issues with the pressure in his mind, still the frustration is killing me.

The same goes for PUA; I can manage theory really well, my mind remembers everything; but when it comes to action, to talk to the girl and lay the girl, the pressure kills me.

I can`t have my licence to embed, and that`s basically an issue I had for years now.
A few bad experienceses when I was younger made me this way (15 or so); but I`m a man now and I think it`s time to be able to handle my mind and be relaxed when I want to.

Can anyone relate to this?
And if so, does anyone know the way of getting it under control?

I`m already practicing meditation, but I`m in for some other advices; maybe a special kind of tea, letting go of my usual cup of coffe, clearing my schedule a bit.

Thanks.

Just got to chill out and practice, practice, practice.

Sure, I was nervous on my drivers test, but before the test I parallel parked with my mom a good 15 times, until I got it right with ease.

A good rule of thumb. If you're COMFORTABLE doing something by yourself, you'll do ALRIGHT in front of an instructor/girl. You have to be MORE THAN COMFORTABLE doing something by yourself, to do GOOD/WELL in front of the instructor/girl.

I've experienced this mainly while playing guitar in my band for shows and stuff. It's easy to play a riff at home, but up in front of 100+ people you get nervous and screw up if not prepared.

What I ended up doing is I would practice the act until it was second nature to me. I would make the task more difficult for myself at home by trying to play the riff while jumping up and down or something like that. Once I was able to play the riff jumping up and down or with my eyes closed at home, I could play it fine on stage in front of people while stationary looking straight at the fret board of my guitar.


So I guess my advice would be this. When practicing at home whatever it is you are trying to do in public, make the act harder than it actually is. Once you are confident in doing the act with distractions, or something else also occupying your mind at home, you'll be fine doing the real deal without the distractions.

"It's so easy I could do it with my eyes closed" Practice at home with your "eye's closed" per se, if you get what I am saying. Then on the date or drivers test. Open your eyes and focus as best as you can. It should be no problem because you have practiced the task at a much more difficult level at home.

Thanks south; that`s actually good advice.

Imma ask a friend to distract me while doing the parking or something like it in order for me to manage it.

The more you do it, the easier it gets. Some people thrive on stress/pressure and it makes them perform even better. Some people get really nervous and it hurts whatever they're doing.

Experience helps HUGELY, like, the more you do something or practice it, the easier it is when it comes to the time you have to step up. But what can also help is if you put yourself in the mindset that helps you best. For me personally, I realised once that it was all a bit silly really, I learned to purposefully calm and compose myself and slowed myself down whenever I was doing anything that made me nervous, and it seemed to work. Driving tests, exams, talking to women. None of these things make me nervous any more because of experience, but to get to that stage I had to fight through these nerves every time. And that was where I just forced myself mentally to relax.

In the grand scheme of your life, it's all small potatoes, it just seems important at the time. Good luck passing next time