Well it sounds just like it says, This post is a self evaluation of what I personally think I am having trouble with. Opinions would be GREATLY appreciated as well as comments but I think this post is also a rant to help me solve my inner fears. You guys can also post your own situations here if you want with your own self evaluation in why YOU think you screwed it up. I'm sure deep down you all have a reason why you think you messed up at something or can't do something. Yes, they are forms of excuses but getting the excuses out in the open and finding a way to correct them might be the proper thing to do so that we don't repeat our own self doubt.

Here's my story:

I have this girl in which i built comfort at the expense of this weird guy who she finds creepy and stalkerish. So far, I think I have had 2-3 opportunities to kiss close and EACH and every time I failed to do so. I know for a FACT that she likes me, thinks i'm quite charming and cute. I made her admit both non verbally and verbally through TEXT.

I think I have underlined the problem down to a few reasons for why I cannot seem to escalate into kiss close When I had a week to do so.


1) I don't want to be thrown into that category of the stalker guy.

I tried to re initiate a conversation with this chick VIA text message after my first attempt failed due to her not giving me anything to work with. (She started the convo after I took her phone and put MY number in her phone instead of asking for hers)

I asked about this weird guy and it seemed to hook really well! I teased, and hit the cocky and funny all at once. This was all done text. I'm more solid VIA text game than in person game due to the fact that you have some time to think of witty remarks.

It seems that my whole not wanting to close her can be due to seeing how she responded to this weird guy. I KNEW that he had no game and was weird, but the way she was creeped out by him was a bit of a shocker to me. (Although I played the "I knew it all along" card)

I guess I don't want to be that person. I got her to invest in me and at the same time, Ill have to admit I have invested a bit in her. It was said that when you spend time investing into someone and worked to get there, you don't want to make a risky move to kinda kill the whole situation.

2) I never found a proper place to close

All the places that I wanted to kiss close were extremely weird public places in NYC. In the subway parting ways, In the middle of the busy streets of NY about to part ways. (Never stand in the middle of the streets to kiss close, it's socially awkward IMO in NYC especially high traffic areas)

I kinda wanted to isolate her to a place where we can sit down. The only time I get to hang out or talk to her in person is right after class. When i'm saving her ass from the weird guy. Lately I have gotten quite nervous as I want to kiss close but I couldnt. I'm both not comfortable with the setting and I'm definitely not in the right state of mind to do so. I'm also worried that I will end up as being the new "weird" guy due to trying to kiss close in the improper setting and state of mind.


One thing I do know is that I think Im really starting to stretch my luck. I kinda get the feeling that she's expecting it and why I haven't sorta pulled the trigger yet. I'm not actually sure on this but It is an educated guess on my part.

She also has asked to hang out. She got her nose ring recently and I mentioned wanting to get my cartilage pierced on my ear. She insisted that we go together. She also asked me if I wanted to go hang out with her on the spot when I was walking her to the train. (She was meeting a friend for some japanese BBQ and asked me to come along)

I think those two are the big underlying reasons for why I haven't been able to pull the trigger.

Another reason I believe I could be doing wrong is that my actual wittyness isn't as sharp as it is in text gaming. I'm not that spontaneous when it comes to talking in person and a bit fast paced talking. Especially when I get a bit nervous. I might also have come across as not liking this girl as much as I actually do. It might have scared her away to get her to admit that she likes me and that I haven't said anything to her yet?

What do you guys think?

Any tips on getting to the right frame and going in for the close? I really want to find myself isolating her to a park bench or something where I can work some magic, but so far it hasn't allowed me too. Either way I know it has to go down soon or else Ill be stuck in her feeling weirded out by admitting she likes me and me not doing anything.

I think im going to try the routine Jaywa posted on the gift kiss close.

I think I better act fast when I see her agian next week. I'll just set up the "I have a surprise for you, remind me to give it to you later" set up in the beginning just in case I can't isolate her properly. What do you guys think? Any advice for a guy who just tried to admit his weaknesses in game? Some friendly criticism, comments, advice or expert opinion would be great. If you have gone through this situation before, Id love to hear it. Maybe I could learn.

Thanks again!