I don't like to use status that says I am a player. These are what I use that have got the best response.


some things I learned, don't promise when you're happy, Don't reply when you're angry, and Don't decide when you're sad.



In a cab with the most deafening, heavy-breathing taxi driver ever. Am half-expecting him to turn around and tell me that he's my father.


That awkward moment when you think u got a text from someone u been wanting to talk to and it turns out to be someone else. (Soon as I put this up I got a text from a girl thats been playing hard to get (: )


If you don't like the way I drive get off the sidewalk



Buy a diary.. Because as much as you like to document your every thought on Facebook. Nobody can read all your posts!!!




You can tell alot about someone by their car. For instance, if its in a ditch its a girl haha (makes girls qualify selfs)


Tell a therapist, not facebook(This one is gold)



"I hate it when I forget to turn my swag off at night and I wake up covered in bitches..." - Albert Einstein




Have you ever seen grafitti on a highway bridge and thought, “How did it get there?”



Those are my most liked, and are the ones that have brought up the best conversations for me.

"I hate it when I forget to turn my swag off at night and I wake up covered in bitches..." - Albert Einstein

Nice...

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Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Which one got the most comments?

this is awsome!!!hahaha!!keep it rolling!!
i also use this website...

http://textsfromlastnight.com/

its got some hilarious shit!!!
but yea people keep posting this is gooood!

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"oh just fuck them already"

Tell a therapist not facebook, got the most reactions.

Thanks for sharing the site, Funny shit:)