Value Negotiation Theory

Over the years I have observed certain patterns in social interactions and have come to appreciate the subtleties inherent in such interactions. As with any theory, all VNT does is portray a systematic methodology of understanding the social environment as a means of understanding and manipulating interpersonal communication for a positive outcome.

VNT (Value Negotiation Theory) is one I formulated on my own but draws from several legitimate Communication theories, including Symbolic Interactionism and Expectancy Violations Theory. The theory is quite simple:

In any given social interaction between two people, an assessment occurs, at a conscious or subconscious level, which initiates a "value negotiation" between the two parties.

We all went to high school. We know about social hierarchies. What we didn't pick up on back then that we can appreciate now is that every person occupies a particular rung on the proverbial ladder that is determined by any number of factors: intelligence, appearance, athleticism, personality, etc. This rung corresponds to that persons socially "perceived value".

This is of course is opposed to a persons "actual value" which I will venture to say is largely unknowable so I will avoid the term in application of the theory. For our purposes the only term worth noting is "self value" or self-esteem.

It is the interplay between these two perceptions, "self" and "perceived" value, that constitutes the basis for VNT.

Based upon the outcome of the "value negotiation", individuals will either "qualify" or "condescend" to one another within the interaction.

Let's start with some context. You are having a conversation with someone you perceive as being "out of your league". The immediate effect is that because you perceive this person as having higher value than you, you will instinctively feel the urge to qualify to that person, to prove yourself to them as it were.

Similarly you will naturally condescend to those whom you perceive as having lower value than you. There are however, several interesting cases worth noting:

The first is that of close friendships, where due to a mutual perception of equal value, both parties effectively condescend to one another, though one may begin to qualify if the other gains an upper hand.

In the second cases, strangers will often qualify to one another as a means of diffusing tension. We call this common courtesy.

In the social environment, we are engaged in a kind of value economy where we are constantly shifting position in this invisible hierarchy. The benefit to the PUA in this environment is the knowledge that this hierarchy is easily manipulated.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why do chicks love assholes? Because they condescend to everybody. Because from a VNT standpoint, they are perceived as having higher value; regardless of their actual value. In fact actual value has nothing to do with it. You can be a fat, ugly, son of a bitch and still come across as having the highest value in the room.

The goal is the management of perception, both of yourself and others. What is MM all about? Demonstrating higher value and getting the other party to qualify to YOU. Similarly, you shouldn't get inflated ideas of other people. The AFC is often guilty of seeing a beautiful woman and attributing her a higher value based solely on appearance.

This is why I'm almost always disappointed when I meet a beautiful woman; they fail to meet those inflated expectations. People are people are people. Often just by talking to a person you will gain a much more accurate perception of their actual value than you will from passively observing them. Hell you may even be pleasantly surprised.

Okay, that's VNT. Let me know if you guys have any specific questions or comments.

_________________
The truth is rarely pure, and never simple.